Manic and Messy
@manicandmessy.bsky.social
Rumpelstiltskin? Honey you haven’t seen anything yet I’m gonna *get* you so good
“Patching holes” Back in my day we had our local Dino it pick up and shake the house like a dog. The fun part was finding all the kids that flew off. They were tougher then, at least the houses were. We sometimes rebuilt the house with less rooms. Always better to just start over, don’t just patch!!
August 14, 2025 at 5:24 PM
“Patching holes” Back in my day we had our local Dino it pick up and shake the house like a dog. The fun part was finding all the kids that flew off. They were tougher then, at least the houses were. We sometimes rebuilt the house with less rooms. Always better to just start over, don’t just patch!!
What if instead of gangsters that did gang things we had freaksters and they did freak things and the had freaksters all over the community freaking the place up freaky style
This is the world that 9/11 kept us from living
This is the world that 9/11 kept us from living
June 5, 2025 at 9:47 AM
What if instead of gangsters that did gang things we had freaksters and they did freak things and the had freaksters all over the community freaking the place up freaky style
This is the world that 9/11 kept us from living
This is the world that 9/11 kept us from living
“Early bird gets the worm” yeah well hookers are up at like 3am and they are fs getting the worm
May 10, 2025 at 8:13 PM
“Early bird gets the worm” yeah well hookers are up at like 3am and they are fs getting the worm
That damn cereal leprechaun dying from a f3nt overdose: Somebody laced me charms
May 9, 2025 at 3:30 PM
That damn cereal leprechaun dying from a f3nt overdose: Somebody laced me charms
Imagine being me, eating the first bowl of a bag of Frosted Flakes out of a deli container. Why imagine? You know what’s holding you back. Take it out QuKing 😮💨😤
May 9, 2025 at 3:29 PM
Imagine being me, eating the first bowl of a bag of Frosted Flakes out of a deli container. Why imagine? You know what’s holding you back. Take it out QuKing 😮💨😤
I’m gonna have all the hair in my body professionally removed and then try and return a waxer with none of the wax pellets wearing nothing but Daisy Dukes and act astonished and make a scene when they won’t take it back it’s gonna be so funny. It looks like I definitely used it. I’d be like a beluga
May 6, 2025 at 9:31 AM
I’m gonna have all the hair in my body professionally removed and then try and return a waxer with none of the wax pellets wearing nothing but Daisy Dukes and act astonished and make a scene when they won’t take it back it’s gonna be so funny. It looks like I definitely used it. I’d be like a beluga
Reposted by Manic and Messy
The president told a Central American dictator to build five more massive slave labor camps to hold US citizens.
April 14, 2025 at 4:43 PM
The president told a Central American dictator to build five more massive slave labor camps to hold US citizens.
Real homies come over at 4am to miss drizzle style dive into your urethra in the magic school bus to save you
April 14, 2025 at 9:51 AM
Real homies come over at 4am to miss drizzle style dive into your urethra in the magic school bus to save you
It’s all “just take an extra shift behind the dumpster at Home Depot” and “ break out the kneepads for the dumpster behind Home Depot“ but what happens when Home Depot goes out of business due to the lumber tariffs? answer that Mr. President. Where will I whore myself out then?
April 7, 2025 at 9:00 AM
It’s all “just take an extra shift behind the dumpster at Home Depot” and “ break out the kneepads for the dumpster behind Home Depot“ but what happens when Home Depot goes out of business due to the lumber tariffs? answer that Mr. President. Where will I whore myself out then?
I’m an office drone. I’m just a beast of burden trodding in the refuse of the beast in front of me. Good thing I’m into that kind of thing amirite?
April 3, 2025 at 6:53 AM
I’m an office drone. I’m just a beast of burden trodding in the refuse of the beast in front of me. Good thing I’m into that kind of thing amirite?
Me: *dying in the battle field as my troop is evacuating* “ go on without me I’m a goner”
Them: I’ll remember you
Me 30 seconds later: no wait I have fomo I can make it lol it’s probably just a cut
Them: I’ll remember you
Me 30 seconds later: no wait I have fomo I can make it lol it’s probably just a cut
March 31, 2025 at 7:44 AM
Me: *dying in the battle field as my troop is evacuating* “ go on without me I’m a goner”
Them: I’ll remember you
Me 30 seconds later: no wait I have fomo I can make it lol it’s probably just a cut
Them: I’ll remember you
Me 30 seconds later: no wait I have fomo I can make it lol it’s probably just a cut
I still ate the whole brownie, baked tummy ache
Got a low weed tolerance, call that an easy bake
March 31, 2025 at 7:28 AM
I still ate the whole brownie, baked tummy ache
Reposted by Manic and Messy
Got a low weed tolerance, call that an easy bake
March 31, 2025 at 7:27 AM
Got a low weed tolerance, call that an easy bake
Reposted by Manic and Messy
Fiona Apple my beloved, I would never do you dirty
March 23, 2025 at 9:51 PM
Fiona Apple my beloved, I would never do you dirty
Tasted the rainbow
Tasted too much; tummy ache
Their true colors show
Tasted too much; tummy ache
Their true colors show
March 31, 2025 at 7:24 AM
Tasted the rainbow
Tasted too much; tummy ache
Their true colors show
Tasted too much; tummy ache
Their true colors show
Having OCD is like having one of those outros they did in 90’s shows when there was sensitive content and they had to be like “yk, I’m not actually a terrible person” except it’s after every conversation and you weren’t terrible but you gotta make sure they know it too
March 21, 2025 at 5:19 PM
Having OCD is like having one of those outros they did in 90’s shows when there was sensitive content and they had to be like “yk, I’m not actually a terrible person” except it’s after every conversation and you weren’t terrible but you gotta make sure they know it too
This was me before I discovered the cleansing power of Dawn™️ Double Duty Damsel Dram that let me get these grippers all clean for my lady. Dawn will clean you up, but you gotta trim those nails you greasy bastard 😏
I can’t hold you, my hands are slippery with the sins of my past (grease from burger)
March 21, 2025 at 8:03 AM
This was me before I discovered the cleansing power of Dawn™️ Double Duty Damsel Dram that let me get these grippers all clean for my lady. Dawn will clean you up, but you gotta trim those nails you greasy bastard 😏
Reposted by Manic and Messy
remember, kids: steal your parents' wallets and buy fentanyl
March 18, 2025 at 12:08 AM
remember, kids: steal your parents' wallets and buy fentanyl
Beyoncé is my geography teacher and she asked me to name the state that is apparently Arkansas. I said that’s Texas. You’re never gonna believe what she said next.
March 17, 2025 at 8:27 AM
Beyoncé is my geography teacher and she asked me to name the state that is apparently Arkansas. I said that’s Texas. You’re never gonna believe what she said next.
When I say goodbye to my bisexual friends they think I’m saying bye but I’m really saying bi. I’m such a silly billy trickster basically a fairy and not like the hot ones the ones, but the ones that leave their pubes in your yogurt as a prank
March 11, 2025 at 8:53 AM
When I say goodbye to my bisexual friends they think I’m saying bye but I’m really saying bi. I’m such a silly billy trickster basically a fairy and not like the hot ones the ones, but the ones that leave their pubes in your yogurt as a prank
What if the stallions were the Megans we met along the way
I need to be in a club wearing all black and dancing to Megan thee stallion right NEOW
March 11, 2025 at 8:28 AM
What if the stallions were the Megans we met along the way
Reposted by Manic and Messy
piss is like water for your eyes
March 8, 2025 at 12:24 AM
piss is like water for your eyes
Reposted by Manic and Messy
Saw someone I’ve been in a prolonged fight with and was going to apologize until I remembered she had no idea.
March 7, 2025 at 11:16 AM
Saw someone I’ve been in a prolonged fight with and was going to apologize until I remembered she had no idea.
Weewooweewoo 🚑🚑🚑 the gay ambulance birgade is here. Oh! You’re gay? No charge, your gay insurance covers it.
See conservatives? The gay people figured out health care before you did. Bet you didn’t see that coming. Be embarrassed.
See conservatives? The gay people figured out health care before you did. Bet you didn’t see that coming. Be embarrassed.
March 8, 2025 at 8:32 AM
Weewooweewoo 🚑🚑🚑 the gay ambulance birgade is here. Oh! You’re gay? No charge, your gay insurance covers it.
See conservatives? The gay people figured out health care before you did. Bet you didn’t see that coming. Be embarrassed.
See conservatives? The gay people figured out health care before you did. Bet you didn’t see that coming. Be embarrassed.
I bet gummies at sky high,from the hit coming of age movie: Sky High (2005) would go crazy, would go crazy
March 8, 2025 at 8:29 AM
I bet gummies at sky high,from the hit coming of age movie: Sky High (2005) would go crazy, would go crazy