When AI keeps popping up to offer to help write DMs to my friends I feel like I'm being offered a wheelchair every time I get up off the couch. I got this! Fuck. Off.

Thanks for ratting me out, Duo.

Yesterday I went to a place I frequent. I thought "Maybe because I'm wearing weird glasses people won't spot me and I won't have to make small talk." Forgot I have pink hair.

Are women boxers allowed to punch the boobs? Please say no.

2/2 Well 20+ years later and I'm all "Never mind policy! There's no comparison! He tried to overthrow our elections which is the very foundation of our democracy." Response from all sides *shrug*

Nice to know I've been on top of shit for so long though! 🤦🏻‍♀️

1/2 Just watching the Boy Band/Lou Perlman doc on Netflix reminded me of something. Early 2000s I was outraged that Justin Timberlake had a solo album and people were taking him seriously. I was all "He was in 'nSync. What are you doing." Response: *shrug*

Rather than kick off this account venting about the state of union, better to start with a purring cat on Buc-cee's holiday pajama pants. Marnie! 🥰

Ahhhh, so how 'bout those Dodgers?! 🥴