One of the only things I enjoy about Christmas in retail is wearing weird Christmas shirts. Currently have this on.

Im 48 and my picture is my pfp. A win is a win I guess. Not really helping their cause being this dim though.

This is the 3rd black friday ive spent with these fellas. Bono must've really pissed a lot of people off when he forced that album on all those apple users.

Another poor decision almost purchase but my kids said no. Haha. Who doesn't want a lamp coming up from someone's pelvis via the butthole?

I should have bought this glorious bastard when I saw it. This is why the good lord keeps me poor. I do not make good decisions.

My son said the slow car ride Jake Paul took reminded him of this.

I asked what her dad was and she sent me this.

Someone on tiktok said Elon Musk is built like an autopsy. I bet he cried when someone read that to him.

I thought I was the only one even though it made zero sense.

I was adding my daughter to my online banking and her email address is her first name last blah blah blah.

Me: First name last name?
*See her jump startled on the couch*
Daughter: Holy hell I thought I was in trouble. You only call me that when Im trouble. Felt like this....

Its so fucked even my son's cat is having an existential crisis.