Lord Kelvin
@lordkelvinx2086.bsky.social
I teach, assemble plastic toys and fight people against their will in video games.
Last time I saw a game bomb this badly on Steam was Overwatch.
January 26, 2026 at 9:44 PM
Last time I saw a game bomb this badly on Steam was Overwatch.
I am now conjuring images of Ilan Wurman crawling through the cavernous ruins of RFK Jr.'s brain.
January 26, 2026 at 6:23 PM
I am now conjuring images of Ilan Wurman crawling through the cavernous ruins of RFK Jr.'s brain.
Reminds me of the old days when anyone using DSFix had to avoid sliding down certain ladders with the 60FPS mode because they'd clip through the floor and fall into the void at the bottom.
January 6, 2026 at 5:47 AM
Reminds me of the old days when anyone using DSFix had to avoid sliding down certain ladders with the 60FPS mode because they'd clip through the floor and fall into the void at the bottom.
There are times when I'm glad I take the effort to preserve all the meme images I've saved off of the internet over the course of 20+ years.
December 24, 2025 at 3:01 AM
There are times when I'm glad I take the effort to preserve all the meme images I've saved off of the internet over the course of 20+ years.
Thank you for your service.
December 11, 2025 at 7:13 AM
Thank you for your service.
Call me a cynic, but if a marriage is so easily blown up by sexting with a robot, then maybe the cheated-on party is better off without them.
November 24, 2025 at 1:52 AM
Call me a cynic, but if a marriage is so easily blown up by sexting with a robot, then maybe the cheated-on party is better off without them.
Maybe it was Astel, he's been known to destroy capital cities.
November 23, 2025 at 10:44 PM
Maybe it was Astel, he's been known to destroy capital cities.
The worm should have finished the job.
(For legal purposes, this post is meant as a joke.)
(For legal purposes, this post is meant as a joke.)
November 21, 2025 at 7:10 PM
The worm should have finished the job.
(For legal purposes, this post is meant as a joke.)
(For legal purposes, this post is meant as a joke.)
Yes, but now you have brought it to my attention that he was unhinged enough to suggest we need moon bases to win a future space war. The last person I remember talking about moon bases was Newt Gingrich back in the Republican debates of 2015.
November 9, 2025 at 1:04 AM
Yes, but now you have brought it to my attention that he was unhinged enough to suggest we need moon bases to win a future space war. The last person I remember talking about moon bases was Newt Gingrich back in the Republican debates of 2015.
The horrifying thing to me is that Cuomo still got over 40% of the vote despite everything.
November 5, 2025 at 3:04 AM
The horrifying thing to me is that Cuomo still got over 40% of the vote despite everything.
I still remember Sony tearing Microsoft a new asshole over the XBox One, because of how aggressively they tried to market it as a media center, and treating the always online DRM and inability to physically share games like it was a good thing.
October 15, 2025 at 9:27 PM
I still remember Sony tearing Microsoft a new asshole over the XBox One, because of how aggressively they tried to market it as a media center, and treating the always online DRM and inability to physically share games like it was a good thing.
To this day, there are probably still people who pee on jellyfish stings because of that Friends episode.
October 15, 2025 at 6:43 AM
To this day, there are probably still people who pee on jellyfish stings because of that Friends episode.
I forget the exact mechanics around it, but this is exactly what is happening right now with ICE and the IRS. They're using tax records to get the living addresses of undocumented immigrants so that they can more easily kidnap and deport them.
October 1, 2025 at 8:00 PM
I forget the exact mechanics around it, but this is exactly what is happening right now with ICE and the IRS. They're using tax records to get the living addresses of undocumented immigrants so that they can more easily kidnap and deport them.
I still regret the time I read ahead in the Bible in Religion class in middle school, and somehow made it all the way through Leviticus before the teacher told us we could skip it. If I ever see another passage about painting the corner of a tent in goat's blood, it'll be too soon.
October 1, 2025 at 5:46 PM
I still regret the time I read ahead in the Bible in Religion class in middle school, and somehow made it all the way through Leviticus before the teacher told us we could skip it. If I ever see another passage about painting the corner of a tent in goat's blood, it'll be too soon.
Honestly, when watching the news of the strikes, it kind of blew my mind that The Nanny was leading the charge.
September 13, 2025 at 8:42 PM
Honestly, when watching the news of the strikes, it kind of blew my mind that The Nanny was leading the charge.
I'm sorry damn glad that Jack Thompson stopped being a thing decades ago.
September 13, 2025 at 3:31 AM
I'm sorry damn glad that Jack Thompson stopped being a thing decades ago.
I swear, I had a student named James James once, or something really similar. Less than five years ago.
September 10, 2025 at 6:30 PM
I swear, I had a student named James James once, or something really similar. Less than five years ago.
I'm so sad that I'm so busy with work that I don't get to join in on the fun until this weekend. I think the global player count broke records again thanks to the XBox release, there may well come a day where it'll hit the near half-million concurrent players from launch month.
August 27, 2025 at 7:08 AM
I'm so sad that I'm so busy with work that I don't get to join in on the fun until this weekend. I think the global player count broke records again thanks to the XBox release, there may well come a day where it'll hit the near half-million concurrent players from launch month.
I like that you tastefully cut it off before reaching the feet.
August 24, 2025 at 5:10 AM
I like that you tastefully cut it off before reaching the feet.
Solution: Only ever purchase ties that are completely unfitting for a courtroom. That way, you are guaranteed never to wear the same tie as anyone else.
August 19, 2025 at 12:59 AM
Solution: Only ever purchase ties that are completely unfitting for a courtroom. That way, you are guaranteed never to wear the same tie as anyone else.
I still remember the dark days when Jack Thompson was considered credible. I think I legit cried tears of happiness the day he was disbarred.
July 23, 2025 at 9:47 PM
I still remember the dark days when Jack Thompson was considered credible. I think I legit cried tears of happiness the day he was disbarred.
Missing from this picture: Fabio Lanzoni.
July 23, 2025 at 7:17 PM
Missing from this picture: Fabio Lanzoni.
I probably had the same look on my face when my parents bought me Majora's Mask ($60) and the Expansion Pak ($40) at Best Buy.
(While that Expansion Pak later allowed us to play Perfect Dark, today I can't help but look back in horror, 40 bucks for 4 MB of extra RAM?)
(While that Expansion Pak later allowed us to play Perfect Dark, today I can't help but look back in horror, 40 bucks for 4 MB of extra RAM?)
July 19, 2025 at 9:14 PM
I probably had the same look on my face when my parents bought me Majora's Mask ($60) and the Expansion Pak ($40) at Best Buy.
(While that Expansion Pak later allowed us to play Perfect Dark, today I can't help but look back in horror, 40 bucks for 4 MB of extra RAM?)
(While that Expansion Pak later allowed us to play Perfect Dark, today I can't help but look back in horror, 40 bucks for 4 MB of extra RAM?)
And sometimes while other people try to steal his takeout.
July 8, 2025 at 4:49 AM
And sometimes while other people try to steal his takeout.