So, when told that I should leave behind those who love me and harm me, I say who will love me? Because no matter how many beautiful things I can say about myself, I cannot love me

Relatedly, I've suffered so much from not telling Ms. A I don't like her anymore. I've suffered so much from not telling Ms. B that I want to go on a date with her. Because I don't think A can hear it, and I'm worried B will feel awkward around me after.

Like sure "I'm beautiful" but you dont want to sleep with me unless you're so wasted you can't consent.