Not Your Typical LifePitts
@lifepitts.bsky.social
Late Diagnosed AuDHDer and PMDD survivor writing words about stuff and things.
Had the Easter Bunny lay glow sticks this year because they're eighteen bucks for a hundred pack.
April 20, 2025 at 7:23 PM
Had the Easter Bunny lay glow sticks this year because they're eighteen bucks for a hundred pack.
"with great love, sincerity, and affection" = "bless your heart" and you cannot change my mind.
April 20, 2025 at 7:03 PM
"with great love, sincerity, and affection" = "bless your heart" and you cannot change my mind.
Reached the age that cozy is my kink and my safe word is pockets.
April 19, 2025 at 3:32 PM
Reached the age that cozy is my kink and my safe word is pockets.
Pickedupsomecoldbrewfromthegrocerystorebecauseitssupposedtocauselessheartburndidyouknowyouhavetoaddwatertothatyouguys?
April 15, 2025 at 12:42 PM
Pickedupsomecoldbrewfromthegrocerystorebecauseitssupposedtocauselessheartburndidyouknowyouhavetoaddwatertothatyouguys?
Me, sharing video of twenty block protest.
Random dude: Not that big.
Me: That's what she said.
Random dude: Not that big.
Me: That's what she said.
April 6, 2025 at 4:51 PM
Me, sharing video of twenty block protest.
Random dude: Not that big.
Me: That's what she said.
Random dude: Not that big.
Me: That's what she said.
Reposted by Not Your Typical LifePitts
I am going to a work event and I got this note about the dress code:
Wear New Balances
Wear New Balances
April 4, 2025 at 6:44 PM
I am going to a work event and I got this note about the dress code:
Wear New Balances
Wear New Balances
If my hoodie can't come I'm not going.
April 5, 2025 at 6:42 AM
If my hoodie can't come I'm not going.
Reposted by Not Your Typical LifePitts
I feel like I am doing a whole lot of finding out for someone who did exactly none of the fucking around.
March 1, 2025 at 10:53 PM
I feel like I am doing a whole lot of finding out for someone who did exactly none of the fucking around.
As for me and my house we'd rather be mentally ill.
February 16, 2025 at 8:40 PM
As for me and my house we'd rather be mentally ill.
The US needs a presidentier president.
February 16, 2025 at 6:45 PM
The US needs a presidentier president.
Oh okay I get it now! This really IS the bad place.
February 16, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Oh okay I get it now! This really IS the bad place.
Reposted by Not Your Typical LifePitts
This is my emotional support post 🤣
February 16, 2025 at 3:53 PM
This is my emotional support post 🤣
Reposted by Not Your Typical LifePitts
Duolingo: We killed our mascot!
Me: Why is that little fucker still mean muggin' me from the corner of my home screen then Duolingo?
Me: Why is that little fucker still mean muggin' me from the corner of my home screen then Duolingo?
February 15, 2025 at 8:28 PM
Duolingo: We killed our mascot!
Me: Why is that little fucker still mean muggin' me from the corner of my home screen then Duolingo?
Me: Why is that little fucker still mean muggin' me from the corner of my home screen then Duolingo?
The White House needs an adultier adult.
February 6, 2025 at 2:09 PM
The White House needs an adultier adult.
Your Mom was a DEI hire.
February 6, 2025 at 2:08 PM
Your Mom was a DEI hire.
The signature cocktail for 2025 is extra strength Tums.
February 5, 2025 at 2:03 PM
The signature cocktail for 2025 is extra strength Tums.
Mom: Wow Haley Joel Osment is so old!
Me, almost 45: He's 36 Mom.
Mom: And?
Me: He's almost ten years younger than me.
Mom: So?
Me: So what are you trying to say?
Mom: That you're old!
Me, almost 45: He's 36 Mom.
Mom: And?
Me: He's almost ten years younger than me.
Mom: So?
Me: So what are you trying to say?
Mom: That you're old!
January 25, 2025 at 11:15 PM
Mom: Wow Haley Joel Osment is so old!
Me, almost 45: He's 36 Mom.
Mom: And?
Me: He's almost ten years younger than me.
Mom: So?
Me: So what are you trying to say?
Mom: That you're old!
Me, almost 45: He's 36 Mom.
Mom: And?
Me: He's almost ten years younger than me.
Mom: So?
Me: So what are you trying to say?
Mom: That you're old!
The NYT word of the day is cognizant and I just laughed so hard I hurt myself.
January 22, 2025 at 11:52 PM
The NYT word of the day is cognizant and I just laughed so hard I hurt myself.
Despite what Smash Mouth says I don't actually like it when my world is on fire.
January 21, 2025 at 2:45 AM
Despite what Smash Mouth says I don't actually like it when my world is on fire.
There's a planet with a day that's longer than its year and that makes more sense than anything happening in the US right now.
January 21, 2025 at 1:52 AM
There's a planet with a day that's longer than its year and that makes more sense than anything happening in the US right now.
In a world where just anything can be said, it feels like the most sacred gift we can offer each other, is not to say just anything.
January 20, 2025 at 5:07 AM
In a world where just anything can be said, it feels like the most sacred gift we can offer each other, is not to say just anything.
16yo: Mom, how do you say MAY-uh-NAZE?
Me: MAN-aze
16yo: Huh? Wait, what?!? Seriously?! Do that again!
Me: No.
Me: MAN-aze
16yo: Huh? Wait, what?!? Seriously?! Do that again!
Me: No.
January 18, 2025 at 5:18 PM
16yo: Mom, how do you say MAY-uh-NAZE?
Me: MAN-aze
16yo: Huh? Wait, what?!? Seriously?! Do that again!
Me: No.
Me: MAN-aze
16yo: Huh? Wait, what?!? Seriously?! Do that again!
Me: No.
My son sniffs out medicine in the popsicles, milkshakes and pudding we give him so quickly he has a promising career as a narcotics dog.
January 16, 2025 at 4:21 PM
My son sniffs out medicine in the popsicles, milkshakes and pudding we give him so quickly he has a promising career as a narcotics dog.
Reposted by Not Your Typical LifePitts
The bartender just very sweetly said to me, “If you are who I think you are, I just want you to know how much I appreciate your content.”
It’s too bad I was ordering a water 😆
It’s too bad I was ordering a water 😆
January 16, 2025 at 3:06 AM
The bartender just very sweetly said to me, “If you are who I think you are, I just want you to know how much I appreciate your content.”
It’s too bad I was ordering a water 😆
It’s too bad I was ordering a water 😆