answer is that I just can't be happy and nobody will be able to convince me otherwise.

be happy no matter how hard I try to be happy, even with medication which just trick your brain, thousands of thoughts running through my brain per second overthinking the next possible death scenario or if someone is gonna block me or partner gonna break up with me so yeah, my

you do enjoy doing or love or other stuff but those things again dont last and are also temporary and love is only a chemical reaction in brain which can make things better but in the end like everything else, it dont last and in the end you'll end up sad so my point is, I cant

business thing like USA for example which shouldn't be the case, so you have all those factors I mentioned and you expect me to be happy while we risk wars, abuse, and forced labour in our capitalist society and yes don't take me wrong, there is nice things in life like thing's

break ups, loses of family, friends or health problems, yes we have researchers trying to make us better and all and there is countries with "free healthcare" which is still covered by your labour but better then nothing but there is countries where health is just seen as a

While most people in world are struggling to live a basic life and pay their bills just to fucking die and lose everything anyway at the end while the only thing you contribute to the world is make the rich richer as you struggled every day. Not to keep in mind other stuff like

which we all know for one how school can be for one, then you got work for like next 40-60 years just to be able to eat and drink and survive, like first you dont have a choice and you are forced into labour to survive when it wasn't even your choice just to make companies richer

have fun, be friend people etc. My point is that you are born onto the world without your own consent and you are forced into society you dont want and you dont really have a choice, you are forced to follow the same system everyone else is, school for most of your childhood life

of all the evil in the world not being tricked by the system as easily I am able to notice that all the rich people and the world are just making this place worst by a billion percent. Since if you really think about it, Life suppose to be enjoyable, do what you want, explore,

isn't defined as a base thing, smartness can be defined separately on different things like meaning one person can be smarter when it comes to flying planes but one might be smarter with physics for example. But my point is that because as a whole I am still smart and I am aware

it's only getting worst and I'm losing connection with myself, and when I say I love you all, I do, I just can't feel it if that makes sense and I do love my partner, I just can't feel it as my emotions are dead if that makes sense

connect to that feeling that much, I don't understand myself ever, people say that I am still young and I will know one day but in fact I never do know, even to the slightest what's wrong with me or wanna do in life or anything, I know nothing and never have and if something,

losing all attraction to humans, I wanna feel love, but sometimes I can't even when I was with my gf by my side I felt better like anxiety wise but on the inside I still felt little to no connection love or excitement wise not that I don't love her cause I do, I just can't

Yeah, I’m totally fine

I’m sorry

Thank you bloo

maybe one day I won't have to again