Kevin Gates
kevingates.bsky.social
Kevin Gates
@kevingates.bsky.social
Not the rapper
In the name of God... do your duty
November 6, 2025 at 6:35 PM
Look upon this email, ye mighty, I hope it finds you well
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings. Look on my works and let me know if you have any questions! 🤗
October 29, 2025 at 10:33 PM
Just got a phishing text that just said "I miss you." That might work on some people, but NOBODY MISSES ME, CHUMP
October 29, 2025 at 3:24 AM
Reposted by Kevin Gates
I’m not middle aged, I’m peri geriatric
September 26, 2025 at 2:15 PM
Once again I am imploring Blue Sky to change its terminology, because unless there is also a fire, Rudy Giuliani is in no way "hot."
August 31, 2025 at 9:16 PM
Reposted by Kevin Gates
Quiznos? Cosi? Subway? Jimmy John's? Jersey Mike's? Any sub shop I visit from this day forward will be judged not only on the taste & value of its sandwiches, but their weight, velocity, & stability of their wrapping.
August 15, 2025 at 12:51 PM
We've gotta work on this terminology - blue sky is saying that Andrew Cuomo is "hot" and I cannot accept this
August 8, 2025 at 10:16 PM
Just doing a little reading on Roman mime and was reminded of "necesse est multos timeat quem multi timent" - he whom many fear must fear many. Some things never go out of style.
August 7, 2025 at 9:13 PM
I don't mean to brag, but I just got an invitation to Financial Services' quarterly updates webinar. Don't be jealous.
August 1, 2025 at 2:31 PM
I hate to give Winston Churchill too much credit, but I think he was right when he said “Americans can always be trusted to do the right thing, once all other possibilities have been exhausted.”

We've pretty much exhausted all the other possibilities at this point, right?
a cartoon of homer simpson and his family in a car with the words are we there yet
ALT: a cartoon of homer simpson and his family in a car with the words are we there yet
media.tenor.com
July 30, 2025 at 4:46 PM
Guess I'll narrate Into The Woods here in a couple of minutes
July 20, 2025 at 12:55 AM
I slept until 11:00, for biblical reasons
July 11, 2025 at 4:08 PM
Reposted by Kevin Gates
People on this app get really angry every time I point out that social media manipulation is a real phenomenon that we are all stewing in and that’s having real world consequences and I’m sure part of that is engagement farmers who do that manipulation not liking people talking about it
July 4, 2025 at 3:24 PM
I was thinking of buying a mandolin, but I think I'm too depressed
July 4, 2025 at 5:52 PM
Reposted by Kevin Gates
[Exit King.]
June 14, 2025 at 6:37 PM
Walked into the room and my daughter was watching a video that started with, "here is a puzzle from the 20th century," and I exploded into a cloud of dust.
June 12, 2025 at 10:07 PM
Reposted by Kevin Gates
May 19, 2025 at 12:30 AM
If I became president, I would declare the White House a museum and work out of a Motel 6
May 12, 2025 at 8:04 PM
Reposted by Kevin Gates
you want me to “get that bread”? the thing that got Jean Valjean imprisoned?
May 3, 2025 at 4:04 PM
Movie you’ve watched more than six times using gifs.

(“Hard mode” no Star Wars, Star Trek, or LOTR)
April 26, 2025 at 1:44 PM
Reposted by Kevin Gates
I think rfk should go to work on solving the male redness epidemic
April 22, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Why not just an AI pope that skeets out a daily Bible verse?
the next pope should be a tiktok sensation
April 22, 2025 at 1:19 AM
Finally
April 21, 2025 at 7:53 PM
"Microsoft is now equipped with Copilot, our AI tool"

Here we go again with this Clippy bullshit
April 19, 2025 at 2:27 PM