Had a mfer really just tell me that Sonic the hedgehog was faster than the flash. @dweepus.bsky.social atone for your sins.

Can someone please tell me when this “Vampire Weekend” is?? I’m starting to get worried.

update: it's coming out

My minion trying to warn me of a potential grease fire happening in my kitchen:

Went black Friday shopping this year and got stampled

uh. yeah. get to rusty bucket bay and then get back to me pal.

If you compile every Sesame Street letter and number of the day into an Excel sheet, you will notice it's actually an encrypted message, akin to a numbers station or the decoder pin from Christmas Story

do NOT look up what happens on the 13th day of Christmas 😰

I'm going to come forward.... I'm the twink at Google that chappel roan was talking about on her tiny desk

When I was younger I thought it was wild and a little suspicious that both eastern and western ancient cultures had similar descriptions of dragons.

Now I wonder the same but about how every culture has the idea of dumplings.

i told my wife i was on my phone skeeting and she got mad

Webfishing is like if byob was a videogame

Click clack moo cows that type