Whenever someone tells me about their day I like to say "just like in that movie" but refuse to specify which one, then I bite them

Women love me. Fish love me. I do my best to care for all creatures and even when I fail they see my efforts

been taking some time to look back at old posts on ‘the other ap’ -utterly mortifying, and enlightening- oh to be young and unabashedly obsessed with yourself- in conclusion; I miss being someone who was so rarely plagued with embarrassment (despite constantly being embarrassing)