Don’t get me wrong I like men ok like cats, there’s cats that are cute and friendly and charming but they are not and will never be in my house pissing on my bed and destroying everything I own, cats and men: excellent for other people.

Recent Google photos highlight of my girl being adorable (something here does not belong 😂)

Clearly they have not known a comfort in their entire lives.

The way I CACKLED

Ma'am, it's 10 PM, and you don't live here. Mind your biscuits.

There's space for cars but not all these fucking cans??? (and remembering to drag them around would be a pain) I'm just so bewildered and say something like, "oh it doesn't really bother me I guess," and she then says we keep them looking nice...

Like uuuh, no? They're always here in their nice little designated spot since there's a dozen bins out there? She must think it looks tacky or something because she's just like, "That would drive me crazy! Don't you have an alley or something out back?"

I know, I'm just the worst mom, aren't I?

Definitely looks worse than it probably was. It didn't even really bleed, but it wasn't going to close on it's own.

EXACTLY

Love mentioning the greyhound scream of death to someone who doesn't *know* and they're like, wtf.

Then you hear them cry like an attempt has been made on their life any time they are mildly inconvenienced, and you gotta be like, "I swear they're fine. They're just dramatic."

Omfg! Always trying to off themselves. Absolutely no self-preservation to speak of, I swear.

Absolutely unbothered by a gaping wound. Was more upset about the staples because they pulled, and I made her wear a t-shirt so she didn't lick it.

Just thank GOD she didn't break a leg, like she has one to spare!

lolol that is EXACTLY the greyhound experience.

We were at my friend's farm this summer, and Harper took off after a barn cat. She didn't realize the tree line the cat ran into was a steep hill down to the creek. Took a good 3x3 chunk of skin off her chest and went back to sniffing the property.