Justin Wallace
LightNews LightNews
banner
justingwallace.bsky.social
Justin Wallace
@justingwallace.bsky.social
1K followers 40 following 7K posts
Father, Husband, Nerd, Occasional Writer

Patreon (NSFW): https://tinyurl.com/yc6ww75a
Posts Replies Media Videos
justingwallace.bsky.social
Wife sent me a picture I didn't know she'd taken after I sent you this. Daughter likes to get super comfy when she's reading, too.
This is my little miracle baby sitting on my big bearded fat lap and reading her favorite book: Llama Llama feelings. She will toddle up, book in hand, saying 'bok bok bok' then burrow into your lap while you read. Once she's done (book done or not) shell throw the book away, get up, toddle towards a new book, then repeat the process.
October 20, 2025 at 2:49 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Yusssssssssss
It is a snip of the confirmation email that I was sent by Patreon approving my Patreon creator page. It had to undergo approval because I now write romatic fantasy (it's smut).
October 20, 2025 at 1:04 AM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Hey everyone.

I know I don't post as many baby pictures as I used to but here's a good one.

My favorite thing about our little bundle of joy is that she l o v e s to read. She will bring you book after book after book then wiggle into your lap so you can read them. Pure joy.
This is my little angel wiggling into my lap and getting real comfy as I read her Llama Llama. She's in a pink shirt with jeans, I'm in a green shirt with my enormous beard and glasses, and we're just chilling and reading.
October 14, 2025 at 1:38 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Have now slipped over the 1k mark and all I have to say is 'thank you' and 'I'm sorry' with equal sincerety.
A snip of my profile, showing that I have 1k followers despite being one of the squarest crackers to ever fall out of the box.
October 13, 2025 at 6:11 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
I'm breaking my mandatory social media break to remind everyone that interact with that this is what my life is like to even maintain whatever poor level of interaction I have with other human beings. I do this literally every day, every single time I'm by myself. It's the only thing that helps.
This is a message I sent to my wife and it really encapsulates a cost and a hurdle that I have in my life that I don't know I talk about enough. I have a very hard time relating to people. I have a very hard time even understanding people. I miss social cues like you would not believe. It is exhausting for me to even interact with other human beings sometimes. I overshare like crazy, I never know what to say or how to engage conversations correctly, and everything I do know or get right comes from exhaustive emotional practice that I do literally every day just to maintain whatever farce of a personal relationship I have with people. The words above are "Especially when I'm home alone cleaning. I can't remember a single time I've done that where I haven't used the time to simulate emotional states." Second text reads "It takes a lot of practice for me to interact with people as poorly as I do, lol."
October 3, 2025 at 7:28 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
I don't normally like to brag because *gestures at everything* but I'm really proud of my small little number after five years in my building. Most I've ever made by a mile.
Shows my base hourly rate of pay at 26.50. Most I've ever made as an adult by quite a lot.
September 28, 2025 at 7:57 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Dunno what horrifying nonsense you're using, but the snopes map (yeah Snopes isn't great anymore but this has been thoroughly vetted by a lot of topography specialists) is still really spot on for displaying the difference.
A map of the texas landmass overlaid across Europe. Texas is big, y'all
September 24, 2025 at 10:31 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Hell I live in Kansas and in terms of pure square miles it's twice the size of Switzerland.
Wikipedia article for kansas showing Square Mileage at 82,278. Wikipedia entry for Switzerland showing square miles t 41,285.
September 24, 2025 at 10:26 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Long overdue.
It is a picture of the Bluesky settings with Ezra Klein's stupid effing name in the mute forever tab because I never what to hear whatever stupid nonsense is falling out of his face again for as long as I live.
September 17, 2025 at 7:48 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
This is the "Yo Dawg" meme template, presented blank here as that will help fuel the joke because this is one of the more prominent and noticeable memes in the year of our lord 2025.
September 16, 2025 at 5:32 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
I love writing like this again. I haven't done this in nearly five years. I am just out here chatting away at the wife, doing worldbuilding in my head and in my spare time and just thinking about writing constantly during an otherwise boring day.

Love writing so much.
This is a conversation between me and my wife concerning my most recent work, which will be a novella before year's end. It states" Bunivar are highly resource efficient. They use the stalks by converting it to hay, the husk by turning it into thread fibers, and the carrot by turning them into food. Plus the specialized bugs they use so they don't neuter the soil by replanting carrots all the time form an integral part of their food chain by allowing them an easily harvested, nutrient dense meat source." "Tastes like chicken, obviously."
September 2, 2025 at 5:46 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Tweet from Tom Tomorrow saying "So the sandwich guy... beat the wrap" Perfection Pacha from The Emperor's New Groove giving us peak perfection of the indication of peak perfection. This meme and this movie are two of my favorite things in the entire universe.
August 27, 2025 at 2:34 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Yep.

First injection is this evening.
This is the confirmation form for the delivery of my GLP-1 preparation kit. Gonna stay up as long as it takes to get this prepared (CORRECTLY) and then injected.
August 13, 2025 at 8:48 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

First injection looking like it'll be tonight!
This is a snip showing that my order of a peptide injection preparation kit is arriving this evening. Because we live in America, and because medical insurance is one of the most vile and disgusting creations in the whole of human history, I have to become Breaking Bad but not actually Bad so I have to mix and prep my own GLP-1.
August 13, 2025 at 2:27 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Oh, no fucking wonder I loved this game so much as a kid.
Full Throttle was a story adventure game from 1995. It is, in my mind, the best example of such games. I played that game so freaking much it literally drove my dad to ground me from his computer because I never let him get it. The image is a snip from the Wikipedia article on the game, which was apparently voice acted by the same people who did a bunch of other incredible things throughout my childhood. It reads as follows "in-house talent for their voice acting, Full Throttle used mostly professional voice actors, including Roy Conrad as Ben, Mark Hamill as the villainous Adrian Ripburger"
August 13, 2025 at 2:16 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Batman being a baller and snapping an old wooden stock shotgun in half while exclaiming that "This (the shotgun) is the weapon of the enemy. We do not need it. We will not use it." There is some emphasis added to This, Enemy, Need, and Use which are best read as added grunts as though you are the one snapping something in half with your bare hands like a complete baller. I have placed the word 'eugenics' across the shotgun to indicate my disdain for using the weapon of my enemy. Love this one.
August 10, 2025 at 9:26 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
AAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. Got one this morning. I win.
Muahahahahahahaha AHAHHAHAHAHAHA God I love my wife.
August 6, 2025 at 3:16 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
*squealing intensifies*
This is a note from UPS about my delivery of tirzepatide from Nexaph. I got 10 vials of 10mg for 170 (including shipping), which given the ramp-up time and weekly injection schedule will last me nearly three months. I am beyond excited. I am nearly vibrating thru reality itself.
August 6, 2025 at 3:00 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
This is really getting to me because it's quite literally my wife and I's love language and the fact that people are so fucking divorced from their sense of, I dunno, duty/obligation/love/effort/whatever to offshore that shit bugs me deep down. A random example from like last week or so.
This is me, being something of a butthead. I admit it, openly and proudly, but in the end I went and got us the food in question and we had a nice dinner. First four lines are mine: "Food." "Preferably of an edible nature." "I would also like to insist on some form of flavor." "Bachelor Chow is nice but it does get a little old." Wife: "That helps me not at all" "Now we're eating out"
August 6, 2025 at 1:35 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Today's big meal.
July 23, 2025 at 5:47 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
I am such an enormous nerd it hurts sometimes.
A text I shared with my wife that shows how much of an unrepentant dork I am. "I have that big dictionary energy, don't I?" Sigh. I can't even bring myself to apologize because I'm not sorry.
July 17, 2025 at 8:29 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Wow.

Fuck you too, algorithm.
It's a picture of fucking coffins that was slotted into an ad slot for me and given how ads work nowadays that's pretty fucking insulting.
July 17, 2025 at 4:42 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Much as it is harder than hell some days, I love being a dad again. Look at this amazingness. I dare you not to smile or laugh while you read it.
This is a story shared to me about my daughter as she was waiting in the waiting room with her mother while my son gets braces. "No. She's just hard-core. She was walking around happy with the puzzles pieces and saw the baby." "She threw those treasures (this is how we refer to anything she picks up and carries around with her) down and ran to the baby laughing." "Then reached in and stole the babies binkie." "Right out of her mouth." "I caught her before she put it in her mouth" "Then she screamed holy murder when I pulled her away"
July 16, 2025 at 5:33 PM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Acquired.
Proof of confirmation of the book that was recommended to me. I bought it through audible for a single credit. The book is called "On War" by Carl Von Clausewitz.
June 27, 2025 at 1:52 AM
justingwallace.bsky.social
Maybe it won't stink?
This is a picture of the average temperature over the next week for Kansas City KS. Right now our humidity is 70% but to put that in perspective it feels like you step outside into a hot sauna. All the time. Everywhere. And it's already 80 at 8 freaking AM. I want to cry.
June 26, 2025 at 12:54 PM