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jupitr2.bsky.social
jupitr
@jupitr2.bsky.social
1.7K followers 400 following 3.2K posts
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twitch.tv/jupitr2

💚 @potat0lina.bsky.social
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jupitr2.bsky.social
I must know
A fake tweet of ex-president Bill Clinton saying, "I did not have sexual relations with that man."
November 15, 2025 at 3:50 AM
jupitr2.bsky.social
Also, they didn't even make the combo free. Just the sandwich. I paid for 2 combos when I just wanted 1 free one, and I wouldn't have known it wasn't free until after I paid anyways.

👎👎👎👎👎 Booooooo, Firehouse Subs
A receipt from firehouse Subs showing a $21 order for BOGO combos, except i paid for both combos and they only removed the price for the sandwich, but not the combo.
November 11, 2025 at 6:34 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
My favorite 2 sentence horror post from reddit:
A reddit post from the subreddit two sentence horror, saying "i feel the anaesthesia take hold as I lie on the surgical table. Just before I pass out I hear the doctor say, "move him to the penis explosion chamber"
November 9, 2025 at 3:36 AM
jupitr2.bsky.social
A wife and groom, but she is labeled "me" and he is labeled "the bit"
November 8, 2025 at 6:56 AM
jupitr2.bsky.social
I always want to do this butt-to-butt with friends
Gonna be hitting this move later if that's ok with you guys, text overlaid onto an image of a woman sitting in a yoga position with both legs straight up in the air.
November 7, 2025 at 4:53 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
sHE
sHITS
HERself
I can't do this anymore (I mean I can, I just need to overact first so I can focus) over an image of plankton with Pedro Pascal's melancholic face shopped on
November 6, 2025 at 5:19 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
An open field with the text "fuck out my face"
November 6, 2025 at 12:39 AM
jupitr2.bsky.social
I love this baby cat so much, but she's literally a menace

Peep her beautiful eyes 😭💚💚💚
Stevie, my ragamese grey kitten, with her big blue orbs for eyes holding her paw out, sitting perched on a white and red holiday blanket Stevie having taken a swipe at me, eyes are just giant blue gorgeous orbs I love her so much
October 31, 2025 at 10:53 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
Here for you all in these trying times
Something lesbian will happen to you soon twin. Don't give up. Over a beach sunset.
October 31, 2025 at 12:08 AM
jupitr2.bsky.social
Where did she leave her glasses, one might ask?
My girlfriend's glasses sitting in the passenger door of my car, don't judge the messy interior
October 27, 2025 at 7:29 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
GF: "I can't find my glasses"

Me: "🤓"
Me wearing a dark tan jacket orange shirt in my office building, with my girlfriend's glasses on that she left on my car
October 27, 2025 at 7:27 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
Fun Fact: nowhere in the rules of Monopoly does it say you must charge your friends money.

You could play the game and everyone wins, you just let greed corrupt you.
The leftism leaving my body the moment I start to win at monopoly over an image of a cgi soul leaving its body
October 25, 2025 at 12:01 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
WWJD
A yellow pylon with a silver sticker on it that reads "you are beautiful" and underneath a label has been placed that reads "PEPPER SPRAY A COP"
October 25, 2025 at 2:52 AM
jupitr2.bsky.social
Don't gih ih twih, bih
A picture of a spoon holding milk and 2 rainbow marshmallows over a bowl of lucky charms cereal, with one larger rainbow marshmallow labeled "my dih" and the smaller rainbow marshmallow labeled "your dih"
October 25, 2025 at 2:51 AM
jupitr2.bsky.social
I bring a level of calm that nihilists and pessimists don't really fuck with
An orange cat (labeled as "me") resting in a field of lavender-colored flowers (labeled as "being soothed by the realization i don't have to earn rest")
October 20, 2025 at 2:28 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
let's see the b&w throwbacks 🖤
A black and white photo of me without a beard, but stubbly, flexing dimples the size of Alaska with black headphones on, I'm looking slightly off camera to appear mysterious
October 19, 2025 at 7:23 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
Sorry, women 😞💔
2 shots of a car wash brush, one where its spinning with text overlaid that reads, "to be a woman is to perform"
October 19, 2025 at 7:19 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
Me and her
2 green ghostly silhouettes lying hand in hand in a grassy field, one saying "i just fuckin farded" and the other responding "me too"
October 19, 2025 at 2:24 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
The place where I work is actually beautiful if I remember to stop and look.
A photo from the window at work showing trees as they're just changing fall colors during a coming storm of dark blue clouds, and there's a visible walking path in the grass that leads to the edge of a small pond with a fountain.
October 19, 2025 at 2:18 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
If there are many Netanyahu haters, I am one of them.

If there is only one Netanyahu hater, it is me.

If there are no Netanyahu haters, I am dead.
""End world hunger or become Godzilla?" me minutes later in Israel:" over an image of Godzilla destroying a city
October 18, 2025 at 11:58 AM
jupitr2.bsky.social
I never post my girl on #caturday

Look at the sassy paw 😭
Stevie, my creme colored Rex kitten, extending her arm in sassy fashion while she lays on the back couch cushion by her pink and white blanket Stevie, my creme colored Rex kitten, extending her arm in sassy fashion while she lays on the back couch cushion by her pink and white blanket, except now her eyes are wider and so blue
October 18, 2025 at 11:29 AM
jupitr2.bsky.social
SHLURP
A Halloween bucket of pho soup with a cardboard sign behind that reads "one slurp of pho per truck-or-treater"
October 15, 2025 at 6:16 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
This may come as a shock
Your result: JUPITER, you often feel unnoticed and unimportant. Even when you try to stand out, it feels like no one sees you. You want recognition, but it rarely comes, leaving a quiet ache that nothing can fully fix.
October 15, 2025 at 1:27 PM
jupitr2.bsky.social
"if my mom has truly changed then that means she was always capable of change, but I just wasn't worth changing for."
A 2-panel capture from the good place with Ted Danson and Kristen Bell, with the quote, "if my mom has truly changed then that means she was always capable of change, but I just wasn't worth changing for."
October 15, 2025 at 3:20 AM
jupitr2.bsky.social
Me, if you even care
A horse overlooking a shoreline, with text overlaid that reads, "sorry if I haven't seemed like myself lately. I am severely employed and I am no longer the same chronically online goblin you once knew me as."
October 15, 2025 at 3:18 AM