I swear to God this is like the kiss of death for any relationship I've had 😅

I've been on antidepressants since March and today was the first day I cried. And brother let me tell you this shit hurts just as bad as I remembered

If I invite someone over to my house in the hopes that i clean my place because company is coming over, but they cancel, do I still need to do these damn dishes?

last night a stripper told me to be more honest with her if that tells you how my life is going

Got blocked for setting my boundaries 🎉🥳

Bro I just be out limerancing like a mother fucker

When you're in a Sublime cover band you actually DO have to practice Santeria.

Breadcrumb me all you want, I’m hungry as fuck

Cancel on me once. Shame on you
Cancel on me twice. Shame on me.
Cancel on me three times. Shame on me.
Cancel on me four times. Shame on me.
Cancel on me a fifth time. I’m in love

Big shout out to tarot card lady on TikTok for encouraging me to ask someone on a date. What do I do now that they last minute cancelled?

At my adhd diagnosis appointment holding in a poop to tip the scales in my favor