Joseph Crown
@josephcrown.bsky.social
I’m a Guru, Hypno Dom, and lifestyle architect inspiring transformation through kink, BDSM, and alt lifestyles. With 20+ years as a hypnotic practitioner, author, and researcher, I’m a muse for counter-culture self-discovery and growth.
Liechtenstein: the only country where war works like Pokémon—gotta catch one more.
December 7, 2025 at 5:57 PM
Liechtenstein: the only country where war works like Pokémon—gotta catch one more.
“’Twas the night before Christmas and on top of the house,
A raccoon stole the fries—quiet as a mouse.”
A raccoon stole the fries—quiet as a mouse.”
December 7, 2025 at 5:30 PM
“’Twas the night before Christmas and on top of the house,
A raccoon stole the fries—quiet as a mouse.”
A raccoon stole the fries—quiet as a mouse.”
Use this knowledge responsibly—or carol chaotically.
December 7, 2025 at 4:57 PM
Use this knowledge responsibly—or carol chaotically.
Remember: every time you choose chaos, Krampus circles your name twice. And honestly… respect.
December 6, 2025 at 8:05 PM
Remember: every time you choose chaos, Krampus circles your name twice. And honestly… respect.
Signs of gnome activity are escalating. Prepare offerings.
December 4, 2025 at 8:19 PM
Signs of gnome activity are escalating. Prepare offerings.
A reminder that creativity is a sacred gift… and some people use it for absolute crimes against the holidays.
• The Texas Gingerbread Massacre
You can run, but you crumble.
• Santa Hard
Yippee-ki-yay, festive friend.
• Edward Candy-Canes Hands
Trimming trees one fatal swipe at a time.
• The Texas Gingerbread Massacre
You can run, but you crumble.
• Santa Hard
Yippee-ki-yay, festive friend.
• Edward Candy-Canes Hands
Trimming trees one fatal swipe at a time.
December 2, 2025 at 6:35 PM
A reminder that creativity is a sacred gift… and some people use it for absolute crimes against the holidays.
• The Texas Gingerbread Massacre
You can run, but you crumble.
• Santa Hard
Yippee-ki-yay, festive friend.
• Edward Candy-Canes Hands
Trimming trees one fatal swipe at a time.
• The Texas Gingerbread Massacre
You can run, but you crumble.
• Santa Hard
Yippee-ki-yay, festive friend.
• Edward Candy-Canes Hands
Trimming trees one fatal swipe at a time.
There’s a thin line between stubbornness and legend — and this man sprinted across it in full armor.
December 1, 2025 at 4:55 PM
There’s a thin line between stubbornness and legend — and this man sprinted across it in full armor.
Ah yes, the bibliothèque intérieure — the inner library.
Mine is basically a mystical archive containing.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go reorganize my shelves before the goblin from my inner prologue threatens me into having a good day again.
Mine is basically a mystical archive containing.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go reorganize my shelves before the goblin from my inner prologue threatens me into having a good day again.
November 25, 2025 at 7:57 PM
Ah yes, the bibliothèque intérieure — the inner library.
Mine is basically a mystical archive containing.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go reorganize my shelves before the goblin from my inner prologue threatens me into having a good day again.
Mine is basically a mystical archive containing.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go reorganize my shelves before the goblin from my inner prologue threatens me into having a good day again.
May we all find the version of ourselves we can hug this hard.
November 24, 2025 at 3:15 AM
May we all find the version of ourselves we can hug this hard.
This Thanksgiving, leave Nana alone. LOL.
November 23, 2025 at 4:17 PM
This Thanksgiving, leave Nana alone. LOL.
The universe doesn’t make mistakes — just messages with questionable phrasing.
November 13, 2025 at 2:38 AM
The universe doesn’t make mistakes — just messages with questionable phrasing.
In the kingdom of flavor, only the bold kneel before Her Hotness, Lady of the Flame.
November 6, 2025 at 4:41 PM
In the kingdom of flavor, only the bold kneel before Her Hotness, Lady of the Flame.
The veil between worlds—and relationships—is thinner than you think.
November 5, 2025 at 2:50 PM
The veil between worlds—and relationships—is thinner than you think.
Some men just want to watch the yule log burn… preferably in Mordor.
November 4, 2025 at 4:05 PM
Some men just want to watch the yule log burn… preferably in Mordor.
I served tea to goblins and still used the good china.
October 25, 2025 at 6:41 PM
I served tea to goblins and still used the good china.
Jury Duty is true-crime on a shoestring.
October 23, 2025 at 7:53 PM
Jury Duty is true-crime on a shoestring.
Precise words turn confusion into connection; name your nothing and you’ll find what’s there.
October 23, 2025 at 4:34 PM
Precise words turn confusion into connection; name your nothing and you’ll find what’s there.
You don’t need perfect words to stand for something—show up, hold it high, and the message finds its language.
October 20, 2025 at 5:15 PM
You don’t need perfect words to stand for something—show up, hold it high, and the message finds its language.
Sometimes, the best teachers are those who can't talk back—but might just moo some profound insights your way.
October 12, 2025 at 5:17 PM
Sometimes, the best teachers are those who can't talk back—but might just moo some profound insights your way.
This is some seasoned advice!
October 12, 2025 at 5:08 PM
This is some seasoned advice!
Most progress begins when someone says ‘good enough, why not?’ and starts doing.
October 11, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Most progress begins when someone says ‘good enough, why not?’ and starts doing.
When your Dom is also head of Naughty-List Compliance.
October 11, 2025 at 5:17 PM
When your Dom is also head of Naughty-List Compliance.
Always nice to be remembered fondly.
October 11, 2025 at 1:59 PM
Always nice to be remembered fondly.
Zoom haircut: optimized for headshots. Shed the fluff, not the focus.
October 8, 2025 at 6:40 PM
Zoom haircut: optimized for headshots. Shed the fluff, not the focus.
Sometimes, the most profound insights come from the most mundane moments.
October 7, 2025 at 8:54 PM
Sometimes, the most profound insights come from the most mundane moments.