jordan 🍖💧
@jordo.bsky.social
Pinned
jordan 🍖💧
@jordo.bsky.social
· Oct 15
okay here's the official post! my very first short story, INSTRUMENT, is out now on itch. 🥳 it's about a guy named Stanley who buys a rare guitar at an estate sale, and things go downhill. i hope you like it!!
jordanmallory.itch.io/instrument
jordanmallory.itch.io/instrument
homo sapiens have existed for 0.1% as long as trilobites were around (300k years vs 300m years) yet i am expected to believe that trilobites never had television or mcdonalds or anything
November 27, 2025 at 5:42 AM
homo sapiens have existed for 0.1% as long as trilobites were around (300k years vs 300m years) yet i am expected to believe that trilobites never had television or mcdonalds or anything
Reposted by jordan 🍖💧
macys parade with huge floats for dr. talos and baldanders
November 27, 2025 at 4:30 AM
macys parade with huge floats for dr. talos and baldanders
"breakfast cereal" implies the existence of dinner cereal, such as tomato basil cheerios or garlic bread crunch
November 27, 2025 at 4:52 AM
"breakfast cereal" implies the existence of dinner cereal, such as tomato basil cheerios or garlic bread crunch
Reposted by jordan 🍖💧
could you imagine if dominos did the inverse as well where if you don't use the big coupons it says "you wasted $21.00"
November 27, 2025 at 2:35 AM
could you imagine if dominos did the inverse as well where if you don't use the big coupons it says "you wasted $21.00"
"You Saved" is so funny. here's how much more we normally pretend this costs
November 27, 2025 at 2:31 AM
"You Saved" is so funny. here's how much more we normally pretend this costs
Reposted by jordan 🍖💧
Closest thing you'll see from me maybe ever to a personal essay about a video game vgbees.com/im-great-at-...
I'm Great At Baby Steps Because I Walk Like That In Real Life - VGBees
CW: medical talk, surgical talk, bones, car accident In late May, an uninsured Lexus driver ran a yellow light and pulled in front of me...
vgbees.com
November 26, 2025 at 10:36 PM
Closest thing you'll see from me maybe ever to a personal essay about a video game vgbees.com/im-great-at-...
vanille is one of my absolute most favorite streamers, please give her a lil look-see!
HELLO LOVELIES!! I have an ambitious goal... I want to amass 2000 darling followers/patrons before I unveil my beautiful new bar next week!
As I'll be moving into the new place, tidying, unpacking, I won't be able to stream but I want to show off some older material to hopefully get people excited~
As I'll be moving into the new place, tidying, unpacking, I won't be able to stream but I want to show off some older material to hopefully get people excited~
November 26, 2025 at 9:13 PM
vanille is one of my absolute most favorite streamers, please give her a lil look-see!
Reposted by jordan 🍖💧
Who am I? Vanille Orion, your bartender, chanteuse, club owner extraordinaire!!
Chanteuse is a nightclub singer! 🎤
I love singing and enjoy opening the stage up for karaoke nights~ 🎶
youtu.be/TBA0cF1-SQ4?...
Chanteuse is a nightclub singer! 🎤
I love singing and enjoy opening the stage up for karaoke nights~ 🎶
youtu.be/TBA0cF1-SQ4?...
「Why Don't You Do Right」cover in the style of Jessica Rabbit
YouTube video by Vanille Orion
youtu.be
November 26, 2025 at 8:30 PM
Who am I? Vanille Orion, your bartender, chanteuse, club owner extraordinaire!!
Chanteuse is a nightclub singer! 🎤
I love singing and enjoy opening the stage up for karaoke nights~ 🎶
youtu.be/TBA0cF1-SQ4?...
Chanteuse is a nightclub singer! 🎤
I love singing and enjoy opening the stage up for karaoke nights~ 🎶
youtu.be/TBA0cF1-SQ4?...
i know you can still enable them if you want but i miss when screensavers meant something
November 26, 2025 at 2:54 AM
i know you can still enable them if you want but i miss when screensavers meant something
Reposted by jordan 🍖💧
Wake Up Honey, It's Tuesday is LIVE TONIGHT ON A SPECIAL MONDAY SHOW.
Who knows what the internet is like in Hot Springs, Arkansas, so let's not chance it. Monday is the new Tuesday (for one night only).
8:30pm CT twitch.tv/vgbees
Who knows what the internet is like in Hot Springs, Arkansas, so let's not chance it. Monday is the new Tuesday (for one night only).
8:30pm CT twitch.tv/vgbees
November 25, 2025 at 12:12 AM
Wake Up Honey, It's Tuesday is LIVE TONIGHT ON A SPECIAL MONDAY SHOW.
Who knows what the internet is like in Hot Springs, Arkansas, so let's not chance it. Monday is the new Tuesday (for one night only).
8:30pm CT twitch.tv/vgbees
Who knows what the internet is like in Hot Springs, Arkansas, so let's not chance it. Monday is the new Tuesday (for one night only).
8:30pm CT twitch.tv/vgbees
click each image that contains your ex-girlfriend to continue
November 24, 2025 at 10:46 PM
click each image that contains your ex-girlfriend to continue
Reposted by jordan 🍖💧
Stanley could sell his new guitar for a life-changing amount of money, but can he survive the nightmare it has to show him first? jordanmallory.itch.io/instrument
November 22, 2025 at 9:31 PM
Stanley could sell his new guitar for a life-changing amount of money, but can he survive the nightmare it has to show him first? jordanmallory.itch.io/instrument
in the first issue of spider-man they repeatedly refer to him as both "peter parker" and "peter palmer" and at one point he uses his spider-sense to geolocate a flying helicopter
November 24, 2025 at 6:45 AM
in the first issue of spider-man they repeatedly refer to him as both "peter parker" and "peter palmer" and at one point he uses his spider-sense to geolocate a flying helicopter
brothels are where broth comes from and that's why they're illegal, so big soup can maintain its monopoly
November 24, 2025 at 1:34 AM
brothels are where broth comes from and that's why they're illegal, so big soup can maintain its monopoly
was playing Bop it and it just said "regret it" and exploded
November 23, 2025 at 10:37 PM
was playing Bop it and it just said "regret it" and exploded
the celebrity i like is going to throw an important baseball
November 23, 2025 at 9:22 AM
the celebrity i like is going to throw an important baseball
when i was around 10, a man came to the door selling magazine subscriptions. my mom saw Electronic Gaming Monthly on the list and, feeling bad for the guy, bought a year subscription. EGM was all I read or talked about and it drove my family crazy; "Jordy please you've told us 10 times already"
November 23, 2025 at 1:18 AM
when i was around 10, a man came to the door selling magazine subscriptions. my mom saw Electronic Gaming Monthly on the list and, feeling bad for the guy, bought a year subscription. EGM was all I read or talked about and it drove my family crazy; "Jordy please you've told us 10 times already"
Stanley could sell his new guitar for a life-changing amount of money, but can he survive the nightmare it has to show him first? jordanmallory.itch.io/instrument
November 22, 2025 at 9:31 PM
Stanley could sell his new guitar for a life-changing amount of money, but can he survive the nightmare it has to show him first? jordanmallory.itch.io/instrument
"The judge also said that body-worn camera shows an agent using ChatGPT to finish an incident report." abcnews.go.com/Politics/fed...
Federal judge rebukes administration's use of force during 'Operation Midway Blitz'
The judge accused the administration of "widespread misrepresentations" on what was occurring during the Border Patrol enforcement operations.
abcnews.go.com
November 22, 2025 at 9:18 PM
"The judge also said that body-worn camera shows an agent using ChatGPT to finish an incident report." abcnews.go.com/Politics/fed...
there should be a biweekly magazine about being bisexual called Bi Weekly
November 21, 2025 at 11:52 PM
there should be a biweekly magazine about being bisexual called Bi Weekly
thinking about the chocolate cake girl from spider-man 2
November 21, 2025 at 9:05 PM
thinking about the chocolate cake girl from spider-man 2
what's the over/under on an ICE recruitment ad playing during the game awards
November 21, 2025 at 2:20 AM
what's the over/under on an ICE recruitment ad playing during the game awards