Jonix
@jonixhensley.bsky.social
I eat, sleep, and shit content. Should really get that checked out. He/Him
Pinned
Jonix
@jonixhensley.bsky.social
· Jan 21
I AM NOT A CINEPHILE. I DO NOT WANT TO FUCK THE MOVIES!
My roommate is so quirkchungus
February 15, 2026 at 9:52 AM
My roommate is so quirkchungus
Mfs be like “I’m so unique” and yet their canes order is always box combo, extra bread, no coleslaw
February 14, 2026 at 9:56 PM
Mfs be like “I’m so unique” and yet their canes order is always box combo, extra bread, no coleslaw
Wind was put on this planet to piss me specifically off
February 11, 2026 at 6:26 PM
Wind was put on this planet to piss me specifically off
Portland is Tel Aviv of millennials
February 7, 2026 at 6:27 AM
Portland is Tel Aviv of millennials
I think it’s perfectly rational and a good idea actually to never step on a plane if/when I have a newborn. Like I’m waiting a good 5 years for that.
February 5, 2026 at 4:15 AM
I think it’s perfectly rational and a good idea actually to never step on a plane if/when I have a newborn. Like I’m waiting a good 5 years for that.
GAY IS REAL IN TOMODACHI LIFE
January 29, 2026 at 2:09 PM
GAY IS REAL IN TOMODACHI LIFE
When I’m in a having fake rickets competition and my opponent is Joseph Pilates:
January 28, 2026 at 4:50 AM
When I’m in a having fake rickets competition and my opponent is Joseph Pilates:
Listening to Hey There Delilah makes me realize why people are misandrists
January 23, 2026 at 8:05 AM
Listening to Hey There Delilah makes me realize why people are misandrists
That’s right! Someone you may know that is addicted to self-insert fanfiction has read more things set in the second person than you! Get fucked!
January 22, 2026 at 5:47 AM
That’s right! Someone you may know that is addicted to self-insert fanfiction has read more things set in the second person than you! Get fucked!
If Trump is dead what’s the Over/under they start “Weekend at Bernie’s”-ing his body with AI
January 21, 2026 at 5:03 PM
If Trump is dead what’s the Over/under they start “Weekend at Bernie’s”-ing his body with AI
I like how Sakurai put a dick and ballsack in smash that has no lore significance at all and no one asked any questions
January 19, 2026 at 8:51 AM
I like how Sakurai put a dick and ballsack in smash that has no lore significance at all and no one asked any questions
There’s a nonzero chance the person behind HowToBasic is earning a little extra cash as an ICE agent
January 17, 2026 at 9:58 AM
There’s a nonzero chance the person behind HowToBasic is earning a little extra cash as an ICE agent
Everyone in my school is a gooner
January 14, 2026 at 4:30 PM
Everyone in my school is a gooner
If someone has Letterboxd Patron they TELL you, in fact it’s one of the first things out of their fuckin’ mouths
January 5, 2026 at 8:24 AM
If someone has Letterboxd Patron they TELL you, in fact it’s one of the first things out of their fuckin’ mouths
I love it when in those “facts about animals you didn’t know” videos they say that goats don’t actually scream like that. Like yeah dude fuckin’ obviously
January 5, 2026 at 2:29 AM
I love it when in those “facts about animals you didn’t know” videos they say that goats don’t actually scream like that. Like yeah dude fuckin’ obviously
Spike from Mario is an industry plant done right
January 3, 2026 at 9:36 AM
Spike from Mario is an industry plant done right
Dispatch is a perfect game for guys who want to coddle emo girls who step on their balls with high heels at 9pm
Not kink shaming but it’s very clear it’s made by those kinds of people for those kinds of people
Not kink shaming but it’s very clear it’s made by those kinds of people for those kinds of people
December 31, 2025 at 9:47 PM
Dispatch is a perfect game for guys who want to coddle emo girls who step on their balls with high heels at 9pm
Not kink shaming but it’s very clear it’s made by those kinds of people for those kinds of people
Not kink shaming but it’s very clear it’s made by those kinds of people for those kinds of people
Ah, yes, that one trumpeter, Kirby HandJob or whatever
December 31, 2025 at 6:13 AM
Ah, yes, that one trumpeter, Kirby HandJob or whatever
This world is so fucking unfair man
December 23, 2025 at 10:18 AM
This world is so fucking unfair man
I just saw like three things so cringe in a row it made me physically ill.
December 21, 2025 at 7:55 AM
I just saw like three things so cringe in a row it made me physically ill.
“I hope Bumblebee fucking dies” -Shaquille “Shaq” O’Neill, 2025
December 21, 2025 at 7:08 AM
“I hope Bumblebee fucking dies” -Shaquille “Shaq” O’Neill, 2025
Okay, what’s an IOS alarm that DOESN’T make me wanna chuck my phone out of a window? Because I’m going through them and they all bring out separate but seemingly endless kinds of rage from my otherwise cool collected rapport
December 16, 2025 at 8:52 AM
Okay, what’s an IOS alarm that DOESN’T make me wanna chuck my phone out of a window? Because I’m going through them and they all bring out separate but seemingly endless kinds of rage from my otherwise cool collected rapport
If someone gifts me a watch in my male adult life, I will NEVER trust them and I’ll NEVER forgive them
December 12, 2025 at 6:47 AM
If someone gifts me a watch in my male adult life, I will NEVER trust them and I’ll NEVER forgive them