JohnnyNonReg
@johnnynonreg.bsky.social
Not a particularly remarkable guy, just another shambling meat husk that occasionally makes jokes that the vast majority of people think kinda suck.
Happy kiddo, happy dad. Absolutely terrified she's gonna break something. LOL
December 25, 2025 at 8:09 PM
Happy kiddo, happy dad. Absolutely terrified she's gonna break something. LOL
If something you eat at Taco Bell sends you into a death soliloquy, bon voyage, chump. You're clearly not Earth material.
December 9, 2025 at 11:15 PM
If something you eat at Taco Bell sends you into a death soliloquy, bon voyage, chump. You're clearly not Earth material.
I've been seeing more Cybertrucks on the road lately, and this image pops into my brain every time I see one. Every. Single. Time.
September 14, 2025 at 6:21 PM
I've been seeing more Cybertrucks on the road lately, and this image pops into my brain every time I see one. Every. Single. Time.
I simultaneously want and don't want to know what a "sex maze" is.
My best current theory is that it's like a huge Pac-Man level with one woman fleeing a gangbang.
My best current theory is that it's like a huge Pac-Man level with one woman fleeing a gangbang.
September 6, 2025 at 3:02 PM
I simultaneously want and don't want to know what a "sex maze" is.
My best current theory is that it's like a huge Pac-Man level with one woman fleeing a gangbang.
My best current theory is that it's like a huge Pac-Man level with one woman fleeing a gangbang.
I wrote this five years ago and it has remained valid through Year 23.
September 6, 2025 at 1:10 PM
I wrote this five years ago and it has remained valid through Year 23.
Why do I picture the "automatic butt ejector" just launching a lit cigarette stub across the room and into the laundry hamper?
I mean, hell, you might as well just smoke the cigarette directly in bed, save yourself the three bucks.
(picture from History Addicts, on Facebook)
I mean, hell, you might as well just smoke the cigarette directly in bed, save yourself the three bucks.
(picture from History Addicts, on Facebook)
July 25, 2025 at 6:10 PM
Why do I picture the "automatic butt ejector" just launching a lit cigarette stub across the room and into the laundry hamper?
I mean, hell, you might as well just smoke the cigarette directly in bed, save yourself the three bucks.
(picture from History Addicts, on Facebook)
I mean, hell, you might as well just smoke the cigarette directly in bed, save yourself the three bucks.
(picture from History Addicts, on Facebook)
Hauling this bitch up the stairs is gonna be a grand time, I'm sure. Pray for me.
July 12, 2025 at 10:58 PM
Hauling this bitch up the stairs is gonna be a grand time, I'm sure. Pray for me.
Saw this on the way back to work from lunch and decided that a picture would be worth paying a traffic ticket, if need be.
May 15, 2025 at 8:09 PM
Saw this on the way back to work from lunch and decided that a picture would be worth paying a traffic ticket, if need be.
CRIME SCENE EXAMINER: ... so clearly, this is where the victim went unconchas.
May 10, 2025 at 10:32 PM
CRIME SCENE EXAMINER: ... so clearly, this is where the victim went unconchas.
... ¿Por qué no los dos?
May 7, 2025 at 11:55 PM
... ¿Por qué no los dos?
I have one wolf. It always wants savory.
It ate the other wolf.
Because savory.
It ate the other wolf.
Because savory.
April 21, 2025 at 11:53 PM
I have one wolf. It always wants savory.
It ate the other wolf.
Because savory.
It ate the other wolf.
Because savory.
"#1"? It's a graveyard, not a taqueria, for crying out loud.
I'm gonna call these people and ask them who I need to talk to if I'm interested in opening an Our Lady of Perpetual Help Cemetery franchise of my own.
I'm gonna call these people and ask them who I need to talk to if I'm interested in opening an Our Lady of Perpetual Help Cemetery franchise of my own.
April 11, 2025 at 4:11 PM
"#1"? It's a graveyard, not a taqueria, for crying out loud.
I'm gonna call these people and ask them who I need to talk to if I'm interested in opening an Our Lady of Perpetual Help Cemetery franchise of my own.
I'm gonna call these people and ask them who I need to talk to if I'm interested in opening an Our Lady of Perpetual Help Cemetery franchise of my own.
"Hey, thanks for helping out at the store today, Frank."
"My name's Susan, you asshole!"
"My name's Susan, you asshole!"
March 22, 2025 at 2:17 PM
"Hey, thanks for helping out at the store today, Frank."
"My name's Susan, you asshole!"
"My name's Susan, you asshole!"
Volunteering* with Little Miss Shitbird to hand out water at a 5K run for multiple sclerosis.
* I use the word "volunteering" in the loosest possible sense.
* I use the word "volunteering" in the loosest possible sense.
March 22, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Volunteering* with Little Miss Shitbird to hand out water at a 5K run for multiple sclerosis.
* I use the word "volunteering" in the loosest possible sense.
* I use the word "volunteering" in the loosest possible sense.
Dinner prep calls for appropriate tunes.
March 16, 2025 at 11:30 PM
Dinner prep calls for appropriate tunes.
NonReg NewsNet: 78.4% of Alexa Poll Respondents Are Filthy Commies
March 12, 2025 at 11:10 AM
NonReg NewsNet: 78.4% of Alexa Poll Respondents Are Filthy Commies
"You tell me, 'that's that' before I beat the hell from you. I have so much strength in me, you have no idea. I have a love in my life. It makes me stronger than anything you can imagine. I would say, 'that's that', Mattress Man."
This is one of my favorite scenes in movie history. Yeah, I'm weird.
This is one of my favorite scenes in movie history. Yeah, I'm weird.
March 9, 2025 at 2:32 AM
"You tell me, 'that's that' before I beat the hell from you. I have so much strength in me, you have no idea. I have a love in my life. It makes me stronger than anything you can imagine. I would say, 'that's that', Mattress Man."
This is one of my favorite scenes in movie history. Yeah, I'm weird.
This is one of my favorite scenes in movie history. Yeah, I'm weird.
@sickoscommittee.org This is not my photo, but I felt y'all should see it. Looks like it could be the basis of a charity drive.
March 2, 2025 at 1:41 AM
@sickoscommittee.org This is not my photo, but I felt y'all should see it. Looks like it could be the basis of a charity drive.