My Name isn’t Alice
@johnemahler.bsky.social
No babe, I’m not mad. It’s just the way you said “chronically online” with negative connotation caught me off-guard is all.
Pinned
Sorry tryptophobes, I’m just a hole.
I’m gonna need y’all to start healing your inner child just enough to be able to receive the love I’m ready to give. Not just the “cuddles” 🙄.
Felt brave. Might delete later.
Felt brave. Might delete later.
July 16, 2025 at 2:27 AM
I’m gonna need y’all to start healing your inner child just enough to be able to receive the love I’m ready to give. Not just the “cuddles” 🙄.
Felt brave. Might delete later.
Felt brave. Might delete later.
When I forget to post a meme a week before it hits the general public and EVERYONE posts it to the point of annoyance 😅
April 4, 2025 at 3:58 PM
When I forget to post a meme a week before it hits the general public and EVERYONE posts it to the point of annoyance 😅
Bothered, unmoisturized, fuck wittable.
February 3, 2025 at 3:40 PM
Bothered, unmoisturized, fuck wittable.
Did someone say “frites”?
February 2, 2025 at 10:20 PM
Did someone say “frites”?
They should make a vape with “Find My” functionality.
December 13, 2024 at 7:44 PM
They should make a vape with “Find My” functionality.
What the back of my Xmas tree looks like is none of my business… or yours, what are you the police?
December 1, 2024 at 8:06 PM
What the back of my Xmas tree looks like is none of my business… or yours, what are you the police?
Going to the Post Office is the literal TRENCHES for #PeoplePleasers.
November 15, 2024 at 6:31 PM
Going to the Post Office is the literal TRENCHES for #PeoplePleasers.
The older I get, the hotter Elvis gets. No, I will not be expanding on that at this time.
November 6, 2023 at 6:47 AM
The older I get, the hotter Elvis gets. No, I will not be expanding on that at this time.
My Roman Empire is Clark “Mark” Griswold’s Non-nutritive Cereal Varnish.
November 6, 2023 at 6:06 AM
My Roman Empire is Clark “Mark” Griswold’s Non-nutritive Cereal Varnish.
No, I actually love that the first thing you tell me about your dog is a “selfless” action you did.
October 24, 2023 at 9:26 PM
No, I actually love that the first thing you tell me about your dog is a “selfless” action you did.
Face card never declines… but my debit card does.
October 21, 2023 at 1:38 AM
Face card never declines… but my debit card does.
“T Break” except it’s just me sending a non-Taylor related TikTok to @jakegiles.bsky.social
September 26, 2023 at 2:19 PM
“T Break” except it’s just me sending a non-Taylor related TikTok to @jakegiles.bsky.social
Sorry I’ve been so absent lately, I’ve been busy scrolling through TikTok’s of Taylor Swift looking at Karli Kloss wondering if anyone will ever love me as much.
September 23, 2023 at 3:43 AM
Sorry I’ve been so absent lately, I’ve been busy scrolling through TikTok’s of Taylor Swift looking at Karli Kloss wondering if anyone will ever love me as much.
Ok but I don’t think people realize how brave I’m being by trying not to be funny today.
September 12, 2023 at 3:04 AM
Ok but I don’t think people realize how brave I’m being by trying not to be funny today.
I just know I’m not living my life right because every time I buy a piece of clothing online, I look at this chart and pretend to know what they mean for me.
September 4, 2023 at 5:25 AM
I just know I’m not living my life right because every time I buy a piece of clothing online, I look at this chart and pretend to know what they mean for me.
Sorry I’m late, the person asking for change on the corner told me “The score is infinite at the start of time” right as the edible kicked in.
September 4, 2023 at 2:00 AM
Sorry I’m late, the person asking for change on the corner told me “The score is infinite at the start of time” right as the edible kicked in.
My red flag is my friend in high school told me that no one had ever died in a Volvo and I believed him.
September 3, 2023 at 11:03 PM
My red flag is my friend in high school told me that no one had ever died in a Volvo and I believed him.
@mynameisnotalice.bsky.social
No babe, I’m not mad. It’s just the way you said “chronically online” with negative connotation caught me off-guard is all.
No babe, I’m not mad. It’s just the way you said “chronically online” with negative connotation caught me off-guard is all.
August 29, 2023 at 8:40 PM
@mynameisnotalice.bsky.social
No babe, I’m not mad. It’s just the way you said “chronically online” with negative connotation caught me off-guard is all.
No babe, I’m not mad. It’s just the way you said “chronically online” with negative connotation caught me off-guard is all.
Sorry tryptophobes, I’m just a hole.
August 28, 2023 at 6:24 AM
Sorry tryptophobes, I’m just a hole.