“We don’t care what’s in your pants as long as it’s not necrotic”

Which, same tbh

Cheney hid the black site in heaven because it’s the last place anyone would look for him

Milo, but bi and autistic. So Milo

At least it wasn’t an mlm scam 🤷

Netflix accurate Kaczynski

Someone told me “um actually it’s 3:30 not breakfast”

I’m considering that homophobia

Really cool how they’re pivoting from late 1950’s nostalgia to late 1930’s nostalgia

Once upon a time my carnivore uncle was telling me about how healthy it was. I asked if he noticed any improvement in the gym. He said he couldn’t go anymore because the gout hurts his feet too much

The motorcycle was placed on paid leave and will likely be sent to another precinct

Yoon commits “worst coup ever,” is asked to leave Unification Church VIP room

I know what I’m putting in my letter to Santa

The best part is when your #1 song is the one you hyperfocused on in March but never listened to since