JL Henry - Author
@jlhenry.bsky.social
❓Whodunits
🏴☠️ Eccentric pirates
🕵️♂️Detective series
😂With a touch of humour
www.jameslouishenry.com
#author #pirates #mystery #humor #humour #books
🏴☠️ Eccentric pirates
🕵️♂️Detective series
😂With a touch of humour
www.jameslouishenry.com
#author #pirates #mystery #humor #humour #books
"Dad? You were born in '79, right?"
"Yeah."
"Yikes. That's old."
Some days, my life looks like a Trojan ad.
"Yeah."
"Yikes. That's old."
Some days, my life looks like a Trojan ad.
November 28, 2025 at 6:53 AM
"Dad? You were born in '79, right?"
"Yeah."
"Yikes. That's old."
Some days, my life looks like a Trojan ad.
"Yeah."
"Yikes. That's old."
Some days, my life looks like a Trojan ad.
I just called the game Plants vs Zombies "Zombies vs Flowers" which made my preteens cringe to the seventh dimension.
Daddyfying things is my new passion.
Daddyfying things is my new passion.
November 7, 2025 at 9:57 PM
I just called the game Plants vs Zombies "Zombies vs Flowers" which made my preteens cringe to the seventh dimension.
Daddyfying things is my new passion.
Daddyfying things is my new passion.
WMD40
This door is squeaking.
*Ka-BOOM*
No more squeaking.
This door is squeaking.
*Ka-BOOM*
No more squeaking.
August 29, 2025 at 7:10 AM
WMD40
This door is squeaking.
*Ka-BOOM*
No more squeaking.
This door is squeaking.
*Ka-BOOM*
No more squeaking.
TINFOIL HAT MOMENT!!!
What if wolves had never been dangerous to humans, and it was just a lie told by a serial killer looking for an alibi? It caught on, then instead of saying: "I took care of that bastard", people would say: "The wolves probably got him".
And the rest is history.
What if wolves had never been dangerous to humans, and it was just a lie told by a serial killer looking for an alibi? It caught on, then instead of saying: "I took care of that bastard", people would say: "The wolves probably got him".
And the rest is history.
August 21, 2025 at 4:18 PM
TINFOIL HAT MOMENT!!!
What if wolves had never been dangerous to humans, and it was just a lie told by a serial killer looking for an alibi? It caught on, then instead of saying: "I took care of that bastard", people would say: "The wolves probably got him".
And the rest is history.
What if wolves had never been dangerous to humans, and it was just a lie told by a serial killer looking for an alibi? It caught on, then instead of saying: "I took care of that bastard", people would say: "The wolves probably got him".
And the rest is history.
I swear, at least 60% of my conversations with my cats are about how it's not yet time to eat.
August 15, 2025 at 10:21 AM
I swear, at least 60% of my conversations with my cats are about how it's not yet time to eat.
I'm waiting for a proctologist to almost win the Nobel peace prize and lose, just to be able to write the following title for an article:
"So close, and yet, so fart."
#dadjokes #baddadjoke #Icantbelievetheyhaventrevokedmydadcardyet #pleasedontcancelme #dopeoplestilldohashtagsthesedays
"So close, and yet, so fart."
#dadjokes #baddadjoke #Icantbelievetheyhaventrevokedmydadcardyet #pleasedontcancelme #dopeoplestilldohashtagsthesedays
August 14, 2025 at 6:13 PM
I'm waiting for a proctologist to almost win the Nobel peace prize and lose, just to be able to write the following title for an article:
"So close, and yet, so fart."
#dadjokes #baddadjoke #Icantbelievetheyhaventrevokedmydadcardyet #pleasedontcancelme #dopeoplestilldohashtagsthesedays
"So close, and yet, so fart."
#dadjokes #baddadjoke #Icantbelievetheyhaventrevokedmydadcardyet #pleasedontcancelme #dopeoplestilldohashtagsthesedays
"If you leave a pizza out long enough, does it become a mushroom pizza?"
Musings of a twelve year old.
Musings of a twelve year old.
August 10, 2025 at 2:52 PM
"If you leave a pizza out long enough, does it become a mushroom pizza?"
Musings of a twelve year old.
Musings of a twelve year old.
Heard in a household of pre-teens:
"That wasn't a fart, it was poop crying for help!"
There is room for sophistication.
"That wasn't a fart, it was poop crying for help!"
There is room for sophistication.
August 10, 2025 at 8:28 AM
Heard in a household of pre-teens:
"That wasn't a fart, it was poop crying for help!"
There is room for sophistication.
"That wasn't a fart, it was poop crying for help!"
There is room for sophistication.
My 12 year old asked me:
"If you had a superpower, would you rather choose invisibility but you can't control it, or the ability to fly but you're afraid of heights?"
Now I want to write a book about these superheroes 🤣
"If you had a superpower, would you rather choose invisibility but you can't control it, or the ability to fly but you're afraid of heights?"
Now I want to write a book about these superheroes 🤣
August 10, 2025 at 8:27 AM
My 12 year old asked me:
"If you had a superpower, would you rather choose invisibility but you can't control it, or the ability to fly but you're afraid of heights?"
Now I want to write a book about these superheroes 🤣
"If you had a superpower, would you rather choose invisibility but you can't control it, or the ability to fly but you're afraid of heights?"
Now I want to write a book about these superheroes 🤣
My son just told me his friend's dad was "actually pretty good at Fortnite", so if anyone needs me, I'll be honing my Fortnite skills.
Not getting out-dadded today.
Not getting out-dadded today.
July 6, 2025 at 7:53 AM
My son just told me his friend's dad was "actually pretty good at Fortnite", so if anyone needs me, I'll be honing my Fortnite skills.
Not getting out-dadded today.
Not getting out-dadded today.
I forgot who said this first, but it needs to be repeated:
In this house, we DO NOT throw food away.
We put it in a Tupperware in the fridge, wait for it to go bad, THEN we throw it away.
In this house, we DO NOT throw food away.
We put it in a Tupperware in the fridge, wait for it to go bad, THEN we throw it away.
July 1, 2025 at 9:15 PM
I forgot who said this first, but it needs to be repeated:
In this house, we DO NOT throw food away.
We put it in a Tupperware in the fridge, wait for it to go bad, THEN we throw it away.
In this house, we DO NOT throw food away.
We put it in a Tupperware in the fridge, wait for it to go bad, THEN we throw it away.
"Dear God... Let us have our enthusiasm back."
Jean-Marc Bernard
"I did. You call it coffee."
God
Jean-Marc Bernard
"I did. You call it coffee."
God
June 23, 2025 at 1:07 PM
"Dear God... Let us have our enthusiasm back."
Jean-Marc Bernard
"I did. You call it coffee."
God
Jean-Marc Bernard
"I did. You call it coffee."
God
Reposted by JL Henry - Author
Hey look!
A squirrel!
A squirrel!
June 23, 2025 at 12:48 PM
Hey look!
A squirrel!
A squirrel!
Do they say "time is money" because, just like time, money flies when you're having fun?
June 21, 2025 at 5:27 PM
Do they say "time is money" because, just like time, money flies when you're having fun?
When God closes a door, a cat will start meowing until it's opened again.
June 18, 2025 at 8:08 PM
When God closes a door, a cat will start meowing until it's opened again.
There are so many parallels made beyween Skynet and AI that we should take it a step further.
John Connor managed to (spoiler alert😜) defeat the T1000 (a newer model) with the help of the T800 (an older model).
Does that mean we should defeat chatgpt by bringing back Clippy?
John Connor managed to (spoiler alert😜) defeat the T1000 (a newer model) with the help of the T800 (an older model).
Does that mean we should defeat chatgpt by bringing back Clippy?
June 10, 2025 at 9:52 AM
There are so many parallels made beyween Skynet and AI that we should take it a step further.
John Connor managed to (spoiler alert😜) defeat the T1000 (a newer model) with the help of the T800 (an older model).
Does that mean we should defeat chatgpt by bringing back Clippy?
John Connor managed to (spoiler alert😜) defeat the T1000 (a newer model) with the help of the T800 (an older model).
Does that mean we should defeat chatgpt by bringing back Clippy?
Feeling lonely?
Just fart.
Someone (preferably someone you have a crush on) will inevitably walk your way. But only if it's stinky.
Follow me for more social hacks.
Just fart.
Someone (preferably someone you have a crush on) will inevitably walk your way. But only if it's stinky.
Follow me for more social hacks.
June 7, 2025 at 9:21 PM
Feeling lonely?
Just fart.
Someone (preferably someone you have a crush on) will inevitably walk your way. But only if it's stinky.
Follow me for more social hacks.
Just fart.
Someone (preferably someone you have a crush on) will inevitably walk your way. But only if it's stinky.
Follow me for more social hacks.
"It's so late, it's dark."
(heard during a Norwegian summer)
(heard during a Norwegian summer)
May 25, 2025 at 8:32 PM
"It's so late, it's dark."
(heard during a Norwegian summer)
(heard during a Norwegian summer)
Sure, the Imperial system may sound silly to the rest of the world, but why is no one talking about how the British measure their weight in stones?
May 24, 2025 at 9:49 PM
Sure, the Imperial system may sound silly to the rest of the world, but why is no one talking about how the British measure their weight in stones?
What if ghosts stopped dwelling in old houses and are now in overcrowded buildings? They can make all the noise they want, live their best afterlife, and people would think it's just the neighbors.
April 29, 2025 at 6:10 AM
What if ghosts stopped dwelling in old houses and are now in overcrowded buildings? They can make all the noise they want, live their best afterlife, and people would think it's just the neighbors.
Reposted by JL Henry - Author
Updating logos to be more accurate.
January 10, 2025 at 5:30 PM
Updating logos to be more accurate.
One of my kids is so bad at lying, he doesn't have tells, he has subtitles.
September 17, 2024 at 8:28 PM
One of my kids is so bad at lying, he doesn't have tells, he has subtitles.
Nothing says "hubris" like putting your winter clothes away for summer in Norway.
July 11, 2024 at 11:31 AM
Nothing says "hubris" like putting your winter clothes away for summer in Norway.
I play Tetris when I put the dishes in the sink.
My kids play Jenga.
My kids play Jenga.
June 9, 2024 at 12:09 PM
I play Tetris when I put the dishes in the sink.
My kids play Jenga.
My kids play Jenga.
And on this beautiful sixth of June (that had started so well), we get hail.
Norway's weather forecast is playing Wheel of Fortune.
Norway's weather forecast is playing Wheel of Fortune.
June 6, 2024 at 11:59 AM
And on this beautiful sixth of June (that had started so well), we get hail.
Norway's weather forecast is playing Wheel of Fortune.
Norway's weather forecast is playing Wheel of Fortune.