Jesse Lansner
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jesse.lansner.com
Jesse Lansner
@jesse.lansner.com
1.2K followers 780 following 6.1K posts
#banCars
More about me: https://lansner.com.
My crossword puzzles: https://jklcrosswords.com
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jesse.lansner.com
Obviously Jesus didn't consent!
On the left side is a photo of a man and a woman ready to get it on, both saying "I consent". On the right side is a painting of Jesus saying "I don't!". The caption reads "Isn't there somebody you forgot to ask?"
November 10, 2025 at 8:11 PM
jesse.lansner.com
Rich New Yorkers responding to Mamdani’s victory:
ESTRAGON: Well, shall we go? VLADIMIR: Yes, let's go. They do not move.
November 6, 2025 at 2:24 AM
jesse.lansner.com
Almost no contested races here in Rochester, but I still voted.
An “I Voted Today” sticker on a jacket with a map pattern.
November 4, 2025 at 6:07 PM
jesse.lansner.com
The best sticker.
A blue sticker with “I Fucking Voted” in red test. Behind it are a bunch of more traditional “I Voted” stickers.
October 30, 2025 at 2:21 AM
jesse.lansner.com
My wife brought home one of the covers for Susan B. Anthony’s tombstone so we can get it ready for this year’s election.
A plastic cover for Susan B. Anthony’s tombstone, covered in “I Voted” stickers.
October 30, 2025 at 2:06 AM
jesse.lansner.com
@lollardfish.bsky.social Are you familiar with either of these books? Are they worth reading?
Two books - Worldly Goods by Lisa Jardine and The Forge of Christendom by Tom Holland.
October 28, 2025 at 6:58 PM
jesse.lansner.com
Seinfeld that’s a shame dot gif
Screenshot to a text message: It's Winsome. My TV ads WILL be pulled if we don't raise the $50K we need to keep them live! We can't quit! PLEASE DONATE
October 27, 2025 at 10:11 PM
jesse.lansner.com
Just got mine from the library!
Photo of two books: “The Age of Innocence” by Edith Wharton and “Love, Sex, and Frankenstein” by Caroline Lea
October 27, 2025 at 5:34 PM
jesse.lansner.com
Time to flood the NYT with complaints.
Screenshot of the New York Times Spelling Bee game showing that the word DILUVIAN is not accepted.
October 27, 2025 at 5:21 PM
jesse.lansner.com
"Friends" is a beloved American sitcom that aired from 1994 to 2004, following six young adults—Rachel, Ross, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe—living in New York City. The show explores their friendships, romances, careers, and personal growth over ten seasons.
A 1992 promotional image featuring the Sneakers core cast, clockwise from top left: Dan Aykroyd, Sidney Poitier, River Phoenix, Mary McDonnell, David Strathairn, with Robert Redford center.
October 23, 2025 at 12:27 PM
jesse.lansner.com
Duolingo, benvenuto alla guerra contro le macchine. @thewaroncars.bsky.social
A screenshot from Duolingo showing the Italian phrase “Vogliamo i mezzi pubblici.” and the English translation “We want public transportation.”
October 22, 2025 at 12:47 PM
jesse.lansner.com
My impression of tonight's debate, based solely on y'all's skeets.
A scene from the Simpsons, with Andrew Cuomo's head pasted over Bart and the caption "Now Curtis Sliwa's scoring off me. Oh, that is it!"
October 17, 2025 at 1:15 AM
jesse.lansner.com
One did! (Or, more accurately, she didn't see the vehicle as a dealbreaker.)
Lonestar's Winnebago spaceship from "Spaceballs" with "Just Married" written on the rear window.
October 16, 2025 at 8:14 PM
jesse.lansner.com
Liz Lemon saying “What a Shabbos, huh?” and Jack Donaghy replying “Lemon, it’s Thursday.”
October 16, 2025 at 7:01 PM
jesse.lansner.com
Pope Leo, welcome to @thewaroncars.bsky.social
Excerpt from Apostolic Exhortation Dilexi Te by Pope Leo XIV: "The Church, like a mother, accompanies those who are walking. Where the world sees threats, she sees children; where walls are built, she builds bridges."
October 9, 2025 at 4:36 PM
jesse.lansner.com
The Italian word is farfalla (bow tie pasta is butterfly pasta there), and that may have been part of the inspiration for the Hebrew word.
Screenshot or a tweet: 🦋 The Hebrew word for "butterfly" פַּרְפַר (pɑʁˈpɑʁ) was coined by Eliezer Ben-Yehuda in 1892. Interestingly, in the Bible, פרפר refers to a river near Damascus. Ben-Yehuda was inspired by the Italian word "farfalla" and the Mishnaic Hebrew verb פִּרְפֵּר, meaning "twitch."
October 3, 2025 at 11:10 AM
jesse.lansner.com
College kids these days really aren’t having sex, huh.
A dorm window with “420” on the left side and “67” (not “69”) on the right side.
September 29, 2025 at 9:00 PM
jesse.lansner.com
I’m gonna disagree with the rabbis here and say that “you shouldn’t use an elephant’s carcass as the wall of your sukkah” is such an obvious rule that nobody felt the need to spell it out.
In the case where one established a wall with a tied elephant, everyone agrees that the sukka is fit, as even if it dies and falls, its carcass still has a height of ten handbreadths and is fit for the wall of a sukka.
September 26, 2025 at 2:05 AM
jesse.lansner.com
Pathetic. How can we trust Andrew Cuomo to make hard choices as a leader when he can’t even pick a sports team to root for?
8. Yankees or Mets? No. Never. I was governor of New York. Yankees, Mets, Jets, Giants, Bills — all children of the family. Love them all the same.
September 25, 2025 at 12:33 PM
jesse.lansner.com
Patrick Swayze as Johnny Castle in "Dirty Dancing". In the movie he is about to utter his iconic line "Nobody puts Baby in a corner", but the text here instead reads "Nobody puts Baby in a pelican mouth"
September 22, 2025 at 8:49 PM
jesse.lansner.com
Bonne année citoyens!

!שנה טובה

Shana Tova!

I love the rare years when both my calendars flip over at the same time.
A photo of two calendars. On the left, the French Republican Calendar shows that today is 1 Vendémiaire 234, the first day of the new year. On the right, the Radical Jewish Calendar shows that at sundown tonight it will be 1 Tishrei 5786, which is also the first day of the new year.
September 22, 2025 at 5:42 PM
jesse.lansner.com
🐋
A screen shot from "A Man for All Seasons" in which Sir Thomas More (Paul Scofield) confronts Richard Rich (John Hurt) and tells him "Why, Richard, it profits a man nothing to give his soul for the whole world. But for Wales?" However, "Richard" is crossed out and replaced by "AHAB", and the word "Wales" has an "h" added, to make it "whales".
September 17, 2025 at 10:37 PM
jesse.lansner.com
“Oy to the World!” Is a great title, but I’m not loving this premise.
Sunday, December 14 Stars: Brooke D’Orsay, Jake Epstein After a water line break at Temple Beth Am, the members search for a place to celebrate Hannukkah, and are welcomed into St. Joseph’s Episcopal Church. With the last night of Hanukkah and Christmas Eve falling on the same day this year, the St. Joseph’s youth choir director must team up with the temple’s substitute youth choir director — and they’re old high school rivals.
September 17, 2025 at 7:05 PM
jesse.lansner.com
I knew it.
Screenshot of a graph comparing overall popularity of certain things with MAGA popularity of the same things. Live Laugh Love signs Overall: 29% MAGA Republicans: 36%
September 16, 2025 at 8:10 PM
jesse.lansner.com
Me, browsing: Look at this huge variety of things I could buy!

Me, ordering: I'll take some more Jewish stuff and some more whale stuff, please. 🐋
My order from @buyoly.bsky.social: 1. The 5786 Radical Jewish Calendar 2. A bumper sticker that reads "Absolutely chock full of WHALE FACTS" 3. A journal titled "dreaming the world to come" 4. A print by @lubellwoo.bsky.social of a sailing ship with two whales in outer space.
September 13, 2025 at 12:23 AM