Jeeves🇨🇦
@jenreeves.bsky.social
I can't wait for the day when the generation after Gen Z writes articles about how nail-tapping everything is cringe. I'd do it myself, but I don't have the cultural capital.
May 7, 2025 at 1:26 PM
I can't wait for the day when the generation after Gen Z writes articles about how nail-tapping everything is cringe. I'd do it myself, but I don't have the cultural capital.
When I find myself in times of trouble, Queen Beyonce comes to me, speaking words of wisdom:
"When he fuck me good I take his ass to Red Lobster"
"When he fuck me good I take his ass to Red Lobster"
April 22, 2025 at 12:09 AM
When I find myself in times of trouble, Queen Beyonce comes to me, speaking words of wisdom:
"When he fuck me good I take his ass to Red Lobster"
"When he fuck me good I take his ass to Red Lobster"
🤞In case hexes work 🤞
I wish JD Vance a lifetime of profound sexual disappointment. May everyone who touches him (including himself) feel such visceral disgust that they can't control what they do with their mouths. May he be followed by echoes of gag noises for all of his days. Amen.
I wish JD Vance a lifetime of profound sexual disappointment. May everyone who touches him (including himself) feel such visceral disgust that they can't control what they do with their mouths. May he be followed by echoes of gag noises for all of his days. Amen.
February 28, 2025 at 8:26 PM
🤞In case hexes work 🤞
I wish JD Vance a lifetime of profound sexual disappointment. May everyone who touches him (including himself) feel such visceral disgust that they can't control what they do with their mouths. May he be followed by echoes of gag noises for all of his days. Amen.
I wish JD Vance a lifetime of profound sexual disappointment. May everyone who touches him (including himself) feel such visceral disgust that they can't control what they do with their mouths. May he be followed by echoes of gag noises for all of his days. Amen.
Reposted by Jeeves🇨🇦
BEGA has asked all employees to send a list of 5 Mambos they're working on
February 22, 2025 at 11:57 PM
BEGA has asked all employees to send a list of 5 Mambos they're working on
"I like to keep people on their toes" is a nice way of saying, "I never want people to feel comfortable around me."
February 27, 2025 at 2:57 PM
"I like to keep people on their toes" is a nice way of saying, "I never want people to feel comfortable around me."
"Your recycling collectors were so preoccupied with whether or not they could launch the bins at the garage door, they didn't stop to think if they should."
February 27, 2025 at 2:56 PM
"Your recycling collectors were so preoccupied with whether or not they could launch the bins at the garage door, they didn't stop to think if they should."
In grade 2, my class went to a seniors home on Valentine's Day. We sang songs and gave out homemade cards. Mine was a pink heart-man with googly eyes and accordion arms.
When it came time, I approached a woman in the audience with my beautiful card.
She said, "No! I don't want that. Shoo!"
When it came time, I approached a woman in the audience with my beautiful card.
She said, "No! I don't want that. Shoo!"
February 14, 2025 at 7:21 PM
In grade 2, my class went to a seniors home on Valentine's Day. We sang songs and gave out homemade cards. Mine was a pink heart-man with googly eyes and accordion arms.
When it came time, I approached a woman in the audience with my beautiful card.
She said, "No! I don't want that. Shoo!"
When it came time, I approached a woman in the audience with my beautiful card.
She said, "No! I don't want that. Shoo!"
Unsharpened pencils are not gifts.
February 4, 2025 at 8:34 PM
Unsharpened pencils are not gifts.
Anyone know when we can eat bats again?
February 4, 2025 at 2:46 PM
Anyone know when we can eat bats again?
Listening to the Top Gun anthem makes checking LinkedIn feel cool and important.
January 31, 2025 at 6:36 PM
Listening to the Top Gun anthem makes checking LinkedIn feel cool and important.
AJ McLean is the exact right Backstreet Boy to be marketing magnetic lashes.
January 31, 2025 at 6:35 PM
AJ McLean is the exact right Backstreet Boy to be marketing magnetic lashes.
King Triton's objection to Prince Eric is he eats fish.
It’s why he hates all humans.
Not over-fishing, or pollution, or ocean mining.
Just eating fish.
Which, fine, but wtf are you eating, Triton? You're telling me a kelp-only diet has you built like The Rock?
More hypocrisy from the top.
It’s why he hates all humans.
Not over-fishing, or pollution, or ocean mining.
Just eating fish.
Which, fine, but wtf are you eating, Triton? You're telling me a kelp-only diet has you built like The Rock?
More hypocrisy from the top.
January 30, 2025 at 3:10 PM
King Triton's objection to Prince Eric is he eats fish.
It’s why he hates all humans.
Not over-fishing, or pollution, or ocean mining.
Just eating fish.
Which, fine, but wtf are you eating, Triton? You're telling me a kelp-only diet has you built like The Rock?
More hypocrisy from the top.
It’s why he hates all humans.
Not over-fishing, or pollution, or ocean mining.
Just eating fish.
Which, fine, but wtf are you eating, Triton? You're telling me a kelp-only diet has you built like The Rock?
More hypocrisy from the top.
I don't think naked machete guy realizes this neighborhood is mid-gentrification.
January 29, 2025 at 8:24 PM
I don't think naked machete guy realizes this neighborhood is mid-gentrification.
I'm not sure I want anything galore
January 29, 2025 at 2:43 PM
I'm not sure I want anything galore
Leave it to Beaver to be 14 years old and still called Beaver.
January 29, 2025 at 2:34 PM
Leave it to Beaver to be 14 years old and still called Beaver.
"OMG 💀"
"Please don't joke about skulls. My friend has a skull."
"Please don't joke about skulls. My friend has a skull."
January 28, 2025 at 7:10 PM
"OMG 💀"
"Please don't joke about skulls. My friend has a skull."
"Please don't joke about skulls. My friend has a skull."
Learn from me. Don't buy the bride a scale for her wedding shower, even if it was on the registry. You will become the group villain. Women will be upset. They will ask what your problem is. Accusations of autism will fly. I repeat: No one will care that the scale was on the registry.
January 28, 2025 at 3:22 PM
Learn from me. Don't buy the bride a scale for her wedding shower, even if it was on the registry. You will become the group villain. Women will be upset. They will ask what your problem is. Accusations of autism will fly. I repeat: No one will care that the scale was on the registry.