Jeffrey Yosephus Dorchen
@jdorchen.bsky.social
essayist, fiction writer, other kind of writer, food preparer and eater, illustration guy, sickened unto death by the folly of humanity, nevertheless astonished by the cosmic myriad
Mike Johnson: ‘My Christian
Faith Is More About Not Jacking
Off Than Feeding The Poor’
--theONION
Faith Is More About Not Jacking
Off Than Feeding The Poor’
--theONION
November 8, 2025 at 3:34 PM
Mike Johnson: ‘My Christian
Faith Is More About Not Jacking
Off Than Feeding The Poor’
--theONION
Faith Is More About Not Jacking
Off Than Feeding The Poor’
--theONION
1/2
Two things are significant: That Cuomo didn't understand food availability is an issue in the city, and that fucking food availability is an issue to build a New York City mayoral campaign around. ...
Two things are significant: That Cuomo didn't understand food availability is an issue in the city, and that fucking food availability is an issue to build a New York City mayoral campaign around. ...
November 5, 2025 at 1:26 AM
1/2
Two things are significant: That Cuomo didn't understand food availability is an issue in the city, and that fucking food availability is an issue to build a New York City mayoral campaign around. ...
Two things are significant: That Cuomo didn't understand food availability is an issue in the city, and that fucking food availability is an issue to build a New York City mayoral campaign around. ...
2/2 ... green finger and Thai red birdseye pepper slices, dried red chili, garlic confit and garlic oil, and ginger-garlic paste. Missing, ghee. Didn't have any.
Accompanying: mixed chopped pickle and tender mango pickle; yogurt
Accompanying: mixed chopped pickle and tender mango pickle; yogurt
October 25, 2025 at 9:22 PM
2/2 ... green finger and Thai red birdseye pepper slices, dried red chili, garlic confit and garlic oil, and ginger-garlic paste. Missing, ghee. Didn't have any.
Accompanying: mixed chopped pickle and tender mango pickle; yogurt
Accompanying: mixed chopped pickle and tender mango pickle; yogurt
1/2 Upma, my way. With salad-tender lentils. A bit of toasted foxtail millet in with thefarina. Spice-wise, onion, coriander seed, black mustard seed, cumin seed, curry leaves (must have, imo)...
October 25, 2025 at 9:22 PM
1/2 Upma, my way. With salad-tender lentils. A bit of toasted foxtail millet in with thefarina. Spice-wise, onion, coriander seed, black mustard seed, cumin seed, curry leaves (must have, imo)...
An economics koan
October 13, 2025 at 7:08 PM
An economics koan
Hey, Jeff, out of curiosity, as you are indeed an expert in the field, what do you make of this?
October 8, 2025 at 7:46 PM
Hey, Jeff, out of curiosity, as you are indeed an expert in the field, what do you make of this?
Donald Trump going full militarized fascist against the US people was all the items on my bingo card as soon as he won in 2016
October 7, 2025 at 4:55 PM
Donald Trump going full militarized fascist against the US people was all the items on my bingo card as soon as he won in 2016
This Wednesday, live on the This is Hell! show, I'll be going over a general principle for repairing the world the fascists are hellbent on destroying. See if you agree and tell me where to fix my erroneous zone.
October 6, 2025 at 9:19 PM
This Wednesday, live on the This is Hell! show, I'll be going over a general principle for repairing the world the fascists are hellbent on destroying. See if you agree and tell me where to fix my erroneous zone.
I present A Full Dorchen. Could also be a Full Croatian or a Full Mexican: pork and beans, Brazilian/Jewish style, Guatemalan Longaniza, eggs poached in the bean sauce, roasted potatoes and cabbage a la Heffay.
October 3, 2025 at 8:16 PM
I present A Full Dorchen. Could also be a Full Croatian or a Full Mexican: pork and beans, Brazilian/Jewish style, Guatemalan Longaniza, eggs poached in the bean sauce, roasted potatoes and cabbage a la Heffay.
Finally, a cure for Black Sabbath's weak opening rhyme in "War Pigs"
"Generals gather in their masses
Hegseth calls them all fat asses"
"Generals gather in their masses
Hegseth calls them all fat asses"
October 1, 2025 at 3:44 PM
Finally, a cure for Black Sabbath's weak opening rhyme in "War Pigs"
"Generals gather in their masses
Hegseth calls them all fat asses"
"Generals gather in their masses
Hegseth calls them all fat asses"
I don't understand how we ended up with this administration. Were Mr. Magoo's corpse and three dozen sock puppets full of dog shit unavailable?
September 30, 2025 at 2:21 AM
I don't understand how we ended up with this administration. Were Mr. Magoo's corpse and three dozen sock puppets full of dog shit unavailable?
That "man van" is a woman.
September 29, 2025 at 9:28 PM
That "man van" is a woman.
"A fetus Cinnabon causes the dreaded auk schism your majesty"
September 24, 2025 at 1:31 AM
"A fetus Cinnabon causes the dreaded auk schism your majesty"
Don't get it twisted. CK's shooter was not an antifascit.
September 13, 2025 at 11:07 PM
Don't get it twisted. CK's shooter was not an antifascit.
Jeffrey Epstein, a rags-to-riches story (from his notorious birthday book)
These creeps knew exactly what was going on. Firing squad for all of them
These creeps knew exactly what was going on. Firing squad for all of them
September 9, 2025 at 6:31 PM
Jeffrey Epstein, a rags-to-riches story (from his notorious birthday book)
These creeps knew exactly what was going on. Firing squad for all of them
These creeps knew exactly what was going on. Firing squad for all of them
“I have just published a peer-reviewed study in a respectable journal proving prayer prevents fatalities during school shootings. Want to see it?”
August 31, 2025 at 10:01 PM
“I have just published a peer-reviewed study in a respectable journal proving prayer prevents fatalities during school shootings. Want to see it?”
Getting my apartment much tidier than this is simply beyond my powers, I'm sorry, society.
August 31, 2025 at 8:40 PM
Getting my apartment much tidier than this is simply beyond my powers, I'm sorry, society.
Our feelings of helplessness stem from the fact that for
30 years the tools of persuasion and coercion have been
mobilized to wage an ideological war for capitalism.
Neo-liberalism places political and ideological considerations
above economic ones.
30 years the tools of persuasion and coercion have been
mobilized to wage an ideological war for capitalism.
Neo-liberalism places political and ideological considerations
above economic ones.
August 12, 2025 at 4:09 PM
Our feelings of helplessness stem from the fact that for
30 years the tools of persuasion and coercion have been
mobilized to wage an ideological war for capitalism.
Neo-liberalism places political and ideological considerations
above economic ones.
30 years the tools of persuasion and coercion have been
mobilized to wage an ideological war for capitalism.
Neo-liberalism places political and ideological considerations
above economic ones.
Chicken and spicy fermented black bean sauce millet
July 31, 2025 at 1:59 AM
Chicken and spicy fermented black bean sauce millet
Bret Stephens, who says the opposite of what's true at every opportunity.
July 23, 2025 at 6:34 AM
Bret Stephens, who says the opposite of what's true at every opportunity.
Ladybug, Ladybug
Eat all the pest bugs
My crops are all dying
My children ingest drugs
from Granny Desolation’s Pretty Songs Of This Living Hell
Eat all the pest bugs
My crops are all dying
My children ingest drugs
from Granny Desolation’s Pretty Songs Of This Living Hell
July 22, 2025 at 7:58 PM
Ladybug, Ladybug
Eat all the pest bugs
My crops are all dying
My children ingest drugs
from Granny Desolation’s Pretty Songs Of This Living Hell
Eat all the pest bugs
My crops are all dying
My children ingest drugs
from Granny Desolation’s Pretty Songs Of This Living Hell