James Melville (Parody)
@jamesmelville.bsky.social
I live in Fife and I'm a massive turncoat, a fash wolf in sheep's clothing. Love me and my sweaty fivehead, please!
Pinned
squidward from spongebob squarepants is sitting in a cardboard box holding a cup of coffee
ALT: squidward from spongebob squarepants is sitting in a cardboard box holding a cup of coffee
media.tenor.com
Anyone want to buy me a coffee? And when I say coffee, I prefer cold hard cash. £50 notes.
I am pure cringe.
August 29, 2025 at 3:34 PM
I am pure cringe.
I see economic migrant @isabeloakeshott.bsky.social is lonely and craving a bit of sausage in Dubai, Richard Tice must not be delivering the goods since he had his new pissbag installed? Might drop her my number, I know a butcher in Fife blah blah blah.
August 20, 2025 at 8:09 PM
I see economic migrant @isabeloakeshott.bsky.social is lonely and craving a bit of sausage in Dubai, Richard Tice must not be delivering the goods since he had his new pissbag installed? Might drop her my number, I know a butcher in Fife blah blah blah.
This heat does nothing for my massive sweaty fivehead.
June 19, 2025 at 2:12 PM
This heat does nothing for my massive sweaty fivehead.
You just don't call anymore like you used to?
February 10, 2025 at 3:48 PM
You just don't call anymore like you used to?
Your occasional reminder, that I am generally unqualified to discuss any of the topics that I have such ridiculous opinions on.
January 30, 2025 at 8:26 AM
Your occasional reminder, that I am generally unqualified to discuss any of the topics that I have such ridiculous opinions on.
You do know, I don't actually believe any of this codswallop, right? It's all about the ££££££££££££.
January 21, 2025 at 12:08 PM
You do know, I don't actually believe any of this codswallop, right? It's all about the ££££££££££££.
Happy two thousand and twenty fivehead!
January 1, 2025 at 9:26 AM
Happy two thousand and twenty fivehead!
I'm more of a fivehead, than a figurehead.
James Melville is a figurehead only. It is not him, but a well-organised media team who push out the continuous scheduled stream of knee-jerk (and often deliberately misleading) posts on the astroturfed #nofarmersnofood Facebook group.
December 19, 2024 at 10:16 PM
I'm more of a fivehead, than a figurehead.
Large Brexit hole opens up in South Wales, residents are told to avoid the area. Curious, that this only seems to happened with vaccinated roads, isn't it?
December 2, 2024 at 12:54 PM
Large Brexit hole opens up in South Wales, residents are told to avoid the area. Curious, that this only seems to happened with vaccinated roads, isn't it?
Reposted by James Melville (Parody)
Who remembers whistling?
December 1, 2024 at 8:22 PM
Who remembers whistling?
Morning! Brew's up!
November 21, 2024 at 9:23 AM
Morning! Brew's up!
I've applied for a role in GREASEY the musical.
🎵"I've got bills, they're multiplying!".🎵
🎵"I've got bills, they're multiplying!".🎵
a cartoon of homer simpson talking to a man with acne .
ALT: a cartoon of homer simpson talking to a man with acne .
media.tenor.com
November 18, 2024 at 10:56 AM
I've applied for a role in GREASEY the musical.
🎵"I've got bills, they're multiplying!".🎵
🎵"I've got bills, they're multiplying!".🎵
I helped shake the jar and now the engagements on X are drying up.
What should I do next? Answers on a postcard.
What should I do next? Answers on a postcard.
November 18, 2024 at 10:55 AM
I helped shake the jar and now the engagements on X are drying up.
What should I do next? Answers on a postcard.
What should I do next? Answers on a postcard.
Anyone got any spare change? My X engagements aren't what they used to be.
a cartoon of spongebob saying " i am on my knees please " with his mouth open
ALT: a cartoon of spongebob saying " i am on my knees please " with his mouth open
media.tenor.com
November 17, 2024 at 2:04 PM
Anyone got any spare change? My X engagements aren't what they used to be.
JFK Jr to the rescue!
US reports first case of Clade I mpox in California
US reports first case of Clade I mpox in California
A person in California has tested positive for the emerging strain, which can cause a more serious illness.
www.bbc.com
November 16, 2024 at 8:58 PM
JFK Jr to the rescue!
THIS is what happens when we don't cherish farmers!
November 16, 2024 at 9:12 AM
THIS is what happens when we don't cherish farmers!
How dare you all leave me on X?! Don't you know that I have bills to pay?
November 15, 2024 at 5:20 PM
How dare you all leave me on X?! Don't you know that I have bills to pay?
Elon Musk almost has fewer friends than I do. Almost.
November 15, 2024 at 4:23 PM
Elon Musk almost has fewer friends than I do. Almost.
I don't half talk some absolute shite about farmers lately eh?
November 15, 2024 at 2:54 PM
I don't half talk some absolute shite about farmers lately eh?
Remember me??? I'm the clammy, sweaty original babe! No idea who that nutty old boot is, sandwich short of a picnic that one!
November 14, 2024 at 9:30 AM
Remember me??? I'm the clammy, sweaty original babe! No idea who that nutty old boot is, sandwich short of a picnic that one!
A brilliant speech from Tulsi Gabbard.
“These cowardly leaders are afraid of a free society. They are afraid of us. They prefer the calm of despotism to the boisterous sea of liberty.”
Which is why I block absolutely anyone on social media, who points out that I'm a cowardly flip flop charlatan.
“These cowardly leaders are afraid of a free society. They are afraid of us. They prefer the calm of despotism to the boisterous sea of liberty.”
Which is why I block absolutely anyone on social media, who points out that I'm a cowardly flip flop charlatan.
November 13, 2024 at 11:32 AM
A brilliant speech from Tulsi Gabbard.
“These cowardly leaders are afraid of a free society. They are afraid of us. They prefer the calm of despotism to the boisterous sea of liberty.”
Which is why I block absolutely anyone on social media, who points out that I'm a cowardly flip flop charlatan.
“These cowardly leaders are afraid of a free society. They are afraid of us. They prefer the calm of despotism to the boisterous sea of liberty.”
Which is why I block absolutely anyone on social media, who points out that I'm a cowardly flip flop charlatan.
I well like sniffing shoes.
Especially size 10s.
Especially size 10s.
November 13, 2024 at 11:26 AM
I well like sniffing shoes.
Especially size 10s.
Especially size 10s.
Anyone want to buy me a coffee? And when I say coffee, I prefer cold hard cash. £50 notes.
squidward from spongebob squarepants is sitting in a cardboard box holding a cup of coffee
ALT: squidward from spongebob squarepants is sitting in a cardboard box holding a cup of coffee
media.tenor.com
November 13, 2024 at 12:23 AM
Anyone want to buy me a coffee? And when I say coffee, I prefer cold hard cash. £50 notes.
Hello Wembley!
a man with a very big head is making a funny face .
ALT: a man with a very big head is making a funny face .
media.tenor.com
November 12, 2024 at 11:35 PM
Hello Wembley!