John Ernst-Kelly
@j3cubed.bsky.social
Told my sister in law that her phone number was so easy to memorize and she thanked me. I'm really good at compliments 💁♂️
November 2, 2025 at 1:55 AM
Told my sister in law that her phone number was so easy to memorize and she thanked me. I'm really good at compliments 💁♂️
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
GONE BEFORE GOODBYE, my collab with Reese Witherspoon, is out now. Can’t wait for you to read it.
October 17, 2025 at 3:22 PM
GONE BEFORE GOODBYE, my collab with Reese Witherspoon, is out now. Can’t wait for you to read it.
We stopped into a random bar for a drink, which then immediately started open mic night. I am uncomfortable and cant drink my beer fast enough
October 17, 2025 at 12:13 AM
We stopped into a random bar for a drink, which then immediately started open mic night. I am uncomfortable and cant drink my beer fast enough
I'll never understand people seated at a restaurant for 50 mins and dont know what they want to eat yet
October 4, 2025 at 11:51 PM
I'll never understand people seated at a restaurant for 50 mins and dont know what they want to eat yet
Ironheart has been out for about 20 mins now, and the first 3 episodes all have crazy amounts of 1 star reviews on IMDB. 🙄 Gotta love people trying to create a narrative that its bad before they can actually watch it.
June 25, 2025 at 1:24 AM
Ironheart has been out for about 20 mins now, and the first 3 episodes all have crazy amounts of 1 star reviews on IMDB. 🙄 Gotta love people trying to create a narrative that its bad before they can actually watch it.
I used to take my friend's digital camera and take random pictures back in high school. Now I take random pictures and hide them in their house.
June 15, 2025 at 2:16 AM
I used to take my friend's digital camera and take random pictures back in high school. Now I take random pictures and hide them in their house.
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
Eurovision stage change is just as fast as an F1 tire change
May 17, 2025 at 8:36 PM
Eurovision stage change is just as fast as an F1 tire change
Who in the UK can convince the Spice Girls to reunite for Eurovision so they have a shot at winning?
May 17, 2025 at 8:49 PM
Who in the UK can convince the Spice Girls to reunite for Eurovision so they have a shot at winning?
Had a dream about it being the first day of school. I graduated 19 years ago, why can't that trauma end
May 8, 2025 at 10:23 AM
Had a dream about it being the first day of school. I graduated 19 years ago, why can't that trauma end
How are there zero tables at Panda Fest in Philly?
April 27, 2025 at 4:23 PM
How are there zero tables at Panda Fest in Philly?
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
Scotty doesn’t knowowwww
April 23, 2025 at 1:31 PM
Scotty doesn’t knowowwww
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
Seen and reaffirmed
April 7, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Seen and reaffirmed
My husband always says Rebecca Romijn Stamos even though she hasn't been Stamos in a long time. Luckily, John Stamos' trip to Mar-a-Lago has finally broken him of that habit.
April 9, 2025 at 9:31 PM
My husband always says Rebecca Romijn Stamos even though she hasn't been Stamos in a long time. Luckily, John Stamos' trip to Mar-a-Lago has finally broken him of that habit.
Last July 4th, we saw Kesha at Wawa Welcome America, and it made my husband finally realize he was a fan. I already had him sold on her upcoming tour, but now that we know it's with Scissor Sisters, nothing can keep us away!
April 4, 2025 at 8:46 PM
Last July 4th, we saw Kesha at Wawa Welcome America, and it made my husband finally realize he was a fan. I already had him sold on her upcoming tour, but now that we know it's with Scissor Sisters, nothing can keep us away!
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
I'm a big fan of Bob the Drag Queen, whose debut novel HARRIET TUBMAN: LIVE IN CONCERT comes out today! Read our funny conversation about it here. www.hollywoodreporter.com/tv/tv-featur...
Bob the Drag Queen on Writing His First Novel and Avoiding Karla Sofía Gascón at Madonna’s Oscar Party
The drag multi-hyphenate enters the literary world with 'Harriet Tubman: Live in Concert.'
www.hollywoodreporter.com
March 25, 2025 at 10:18 PM
I'm a big fan of Bob the Drag Queen, whose debut novel HARRIET TUBMAN: LIVE IN CONCERT comes out today! Read our funny conversation about it here. www.hollywoodreporter.com/tv/tv-featur...
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
Ohh "America First" was a hit list
April 3, 2025 at 6:43 PM
Ohh "America First" was a hit list
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
I was not familiar with Klobuchar’s game.
April 3, 2025 at 9:00 PM
I was not familiar with Klobuchar’s game.
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
The penguins react to tariffs
April 3, 2025 at 7:41 PM
The penguins react to tariffs
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
The question of if a country could fuck itself harder than the UK did with Brexit has today been answered.
April 2, 2025 at 9:03 PM
The question of if a country could fuck itself harder than the UK did with Brexit has today been answered.
Reposted by John Ernst-Kelly
Someone at SNL should write a skit for Bowen Yang as one of the penguins
April 3, 2025 at 4:53 AM
Someone at SNL should write a skit for Bowen Yang as one of the penguins
Had a nightmare that a scary white tarantula crawled out of my urethra and started terrorizing me. These are the dreams that B horror movies are made of.
March 29, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Had a nightmare that a scary white tarantula crawled out of my urethra and started terrorizing me. These are the dreams that B horror movies are made of.
My husband is taking me to see @kathygriffin.bsky.social tonight for my birthday, and I can't wait! I credit this woman for my ability to tell a long story and make it sound funny.
March 15, 2025 at 10:40 PM
My husband is taking me to see @kathygriffin.bsky.social tonight for my birthday, and I can't wait! I credit this woman for my ability to tell a long story and make it sound funny.