I have, as a 33.9 year old adult male, never once thought about my parents having sex. But after smoking 1.6 grams of marijuana, I’m starting to a mild sense of paranoid while I consider this Dr. Robotnik character and what horrific things he’s been doing to these little beans all this time.

Apparently he has this device called a Mean Bean Machine.

For instance, did you know about this Dr. Robotnik character

There are ghosts everywhere to plague you with the fear of making the wrong decision. But “The Lord did not give us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power and love and sound mind…” (the way I first heard it, 2 Timothy 1:7)

It’s a hard thing to do (no pun intended. I’m being serious here). Often you have a choice between two things, and you choose one for one reason, and other people interpret your choice as another reason.

It’s just an endless series of minute decisions which matter more to other people than yourself

Like, I’m ugly. My skin is pale and flabby. I’ve got cuts and blood vessels popping all over my knuckles. It’s horrible.

to be doing. If you don’t act as a young stud who wants to fuck older women, you’ll get labeled as a “gross incel”, or homosexual, or the fallback option, “in need of psychiatric medication”.

This whole country is completely disgusting.

I hate even having to bring this up, it just seems like a topic that everyone else (namely, women) seem super upset about all the time.

I don’t get it.

I could have had probably *four* kids by now. Maybe started a company or two. Definitely would have owned a house. Likely would be going to church every Sunday.

Instead, none of that happened. And here I am (alone and isolated, which I am now accustomed to), writing dumb shit on social media.

Long story short, I spent 6 years basically alone by myself, with my family from home holding me back at arm’s length, for reasons that are still entirely inscrutable to me.

They weren’t all bad years. I learned a lot and gained a ton of skills & knowledge. They were just a complete waste of time.

- I make many friends through doing service work, those friends go on to tell their beautiful female friends how great I am, and then one of them decides to give me a shot
- Which would then make me motivated to actually work out, eat right, and lose weight enough to justify myself as a partner.

Anyway. My thought process was:
- I’m fat, unattractive, snd unmotivated to do anything but find a wife and have kids.
- I’m a self-made programmer with a decade of experience in programming. I started my way up from $15/hr gigs to a $150k/year salary. I could teach people how to code easily.

(Wow it’s 4:20. Not intended lol. Wtf)