Matt Fried
@iammattfried.bsky.social
Writer, Dog Uncle, Ex-Crush, Some Guy from Philly
2023 Launchpad Prose Top 50 Finalist
2019 Screencraft Stage Play SemiFinalist
📚The Survivalist, “Homecoming Dance”
📍Chicago, IL (But missing NYC)
2023 Launchpad Prose Top 50 Finalist
2019 Screencraft Stage Play SemiFinalist
📚The Survivalist, “Homecoming Dance”
📍Chicago, IL (But missing NYC)
I love the Eagles, but I’ll never forgive what they did to DeMarco Murray. How does Chip Kelly still get hired?
December 10, 2025 at 5:35 PM
I love the Eagles, but I’ll never forgive what they did to DeMarco Murray. How does Chip Kelly still get hired?
Google *friendly robot Philadelphia* and then take your best educated guess at what happens to these cars after 24 hours on the Philly streets…
July 8, 2025 at 12:15 AM
Google *friendly robot Philadelphia* and then take your best educated guess at what happens to these cars after 24 hours on the Philly streets…
I will not stand for this Marion Ravenswood slander!
May 14, 2025 at 4:53 PM
I will not stand for this Marion Ravenswood slander!
“It’s-a me, Mario! Yahoo!”
May 9, 2025 at 9:50 PM
“It’s-a me, Mario! Yahoo!”
When you’re dressed and ready to go to your cool older cousin’s wedding, but mom and dad are fighting again.
February 28, 2025 at 10:39 PM
When you’re dressed and ready to go to your cool older cousin’s wedding, but mom and dad are fighting again.
Given the past month, I’d rather not.
February 21, 2025 at 10:25 PM
Given the past month, I’d rather not.
The real estate market’s so expensive, you can’t even afford something with Jaden Smith’s face smashed into it.
February 3, 2025 at 2:29 AM
The real estate market’s so expensive, you can’t even afford something with Jaden Smith’s face smashed into it.
The Cure’s Songs of A Lost World is brilliant. Yes, it’s goth af, but it’s musically complex. Resplendent in soundscapes and movements that are inspiring.
A great rock band, yes. But incredible musicians all around.
A great rock band, yes. But incredible musicians all around.
January 22, 2025 at 9:15 PM
The Cure’s Songs of A Lost World is brilliant. Yes, it’s goth af, but it’s musically complex. Resplendent in soundscapes and movements that are inspiring.
A great rock band, yes. But incredible musicians all around.
A great rock band, yes. But incredible musicians all around.
“I call it… Xmail!” -Elon Musk
December 17, 2024 at 4:27 PM
“I call it… Xmail!” -Elon Musk
I would like to emend my NJ drone conspiracy theory. I’ve had time to research and think more critically.
It’s silly to joke that it’s some guy rebooting Girls Gone Wild.
Being NJ, all the drones are probably owned by Joe Piscopo.
It’s silly to joke that it’s some guy rebooting Girls Gone Wild.
Being NJ, all the drones are probably owned by Joe Piscopo.
December 16, 2024 at 9:43 PM
I would like to emend my NJ drone conspiracy theory. I’ve had time to research and think more critically.
It’s silly to joke that it’s some guy rebooting Girls Gone Wild.
Being NJ, all the drones are probably owned by Joe Piscopo.
It’s silly to joke that it’s some guy rebooting Girls Gone Wild.
Being NJ, all the drones are probably owned by Joe Piscopo.
As a Thanksgiving baby, all I see in these early season Christmas decorations going up is my own erasure.
Baskin Robbins, thankfully, is the one corporation that will not be complicit. Thank you, BR, for creating a safe space for me.
Baskin Robbins, thankfully, is the one corporation that will not be complicit. Thank you, BR, for creating a safe space for me.
November 20, 2024 at 3:54 PM
As a Thanksgiving baby, all I see in these early season Christmas decorations going up is my own erasure.
Baskin Robbins, thankfully, is the one corporation that will not be complicit. Thank you, BR, for creating a safe space for me.
Baskin Robbins, thankfully, is the one corporation that will not be complicit. Thank you, BR, for creating a safe space for me.