Horrid Haikus
horridhaikus.bsky.social
Horrid Haikus
@horridhaikus.bsky.social
I write crass poems.
Pinned
Haiku's are pure class.
Create art within the lines.
Should I shave my balls?
When sexbots are real,
"Human Cyborg Relations"
Will be a real job.

#MayThe4th
#StarWars
#Haiku
May 4, 2025 at 12:13 PM
Human Centipede.
Add more, make it a circle.
No start and no #end.

#vss365
April 14, 2025 at 11:53 AM
A big top of #noise.
A lion bites my sternum.
The crowd goes apeshit.

#vss365
April 10, 2025 at 11:09 AM
Follow my purpose.
My goal, perpetuate #life.
Wait. Is this a sock?

#vss365
April 8, 2025 at 12:23 PM
Fortunes into dust.
Dead cat #bounce of your empire.
Eat a shit sandwich.

#vss365
April 3, 2025 at 12:19 PM
Ye olden days sucked.
Clothes made of the coarsest #thread.
Churned butter is ass.

#vss365
April 2, 2025 at 12:50 PM
Bougie #luggage guy.
It was a simple question.
Would a torso fit?

#vss365
April 1, 2025 at 11:06 AM
Can't afford new clothes.
Underwear is paper thin.
Fine brown #gossamer.

#vss365
March 29, 2025 at 1:38 PM
Big nepo baby.
Worms #canoodle with my brain.
Nobody likes me.

#vss365
March 27, 2025 at 10:58 AM
Ate my phone and belt.
With those eyes I can't stay mad.
#Insatiable beast.

#vss365
March 26, 2025 at 12:29 PM
#Passion fruit sucks ass.
Like eating sweetened snot bowls.
Aftertaste of feet.

#vss365
March 23, 2025 at 12:32 PM
My super power:
#Radioactive vision.
Can't see my children.

#vss365
March 21, 2025 at 7:12 AM
Swim with my nephews.
Fun game called "Sink Uncle Mike"
#Cerulean death.

#vss365
March 16, 2025 at 12:30 PM
Pretend companion.
Put a bra on my pillow.
#myopic girlfriend.

#vss365
March 14, 2025 at 12:18 PM
TRON was such bullshit.
Where were the scammers and porn?
Unrealistic.
March 13, 2025 at 11:31 AM
#Chime of the school bells.
Who's not indoctrinated?
Smokers in the back.

#vss365
March 12, 2025 at 1:29 PM
Tree fell on my friend.
I could tell it was assault.
All #copse are bastards.

#vss365
#DragonFriends
@demilardner.bsky.social
March 7, 2025 at 11:56 AM
Break into your house.
#Incognito Bandito.
Steal your dirty socks.

#vss365
March 5, 2025 at 1:14 PM
Gals: a nude pic tip.
Use high lighting on your chest.
Wear a #penumbra.

#vss365
March 4, 2025 at 1:21 PM
Restraining order:
"Maintain one-hundred #fathoms"
Was judge a pirate?

#vss365
March 2, 2025 at 2:13 PM
Drug #emporium.
Choose your own euphorium.
Try cocainium.

#vss365
March 1, 2025 at 1:53 PM
Is there more to life
than writing haiku dick jokes?
No. No, there is not.
February 28, 2025 at 1:21 PM
Remarkable dick.
#Outlier on the bell curve.
But on the wrong side.

#vss365
February 28, 2025 at 12:49 PM
She #contours her face.
I carve hearts into my pubes.
Beautification.

#vss365
February 27, 2025 at 2:06 PM
Thigh high riding boots.
And a little black corset
with the #fringe on top.

#vss365
February 25, 2025 at 1:52 PM