Avril incandenza simp
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horacegreene.bsky.social
Avril incandenza simp
@horacegreene.bsky.social
Creative Director @ Vyvanse 🏴‍☠️
It’s gonna kinda suck in the future when the drone strikes that kill families are ordered by ESPN’s Stephen A Smith
August 11, 2025 at 2:11 AM
Skinamarink happened to my buddy’s apartment
July 25, 2025 at 5:32 PM
The Pittsburgh Pirates shut out a team for a whole series and then immediately get shutout for a whole series… the 2025 Pirates might be the most Pittsburgh Pirates Pittsburgh Pirates team to ever do it
July 6, 2025 at 10:33 PM
Cut off funding to Ukraine
Coco Gauff suffers a shock first-round exit at Wimbledon.

The second seed is beaten in straight sets by Ukraine's Dayana Yastremka (7-6, 6-1) and will leave SW19 just as the tournament kicks into gear.
July 1, 2025 at 10:59 PM
We need Letterboxd but for dreams
June 12, 2025 at 9:18 PM
The Secret Whole Body Deoderant commercials are a psyop to make men gay

And it’s working
June 5, 2025 at 5:23 PM
Young Joan Baez deeply zero beers
June 1, 2025 at 1:16 AM
*kanye voice* They don’t understand the things I say on Bluesky
May 30, 2025 at 5:35 PM
Gotta document that I hit the Carmelo Anthony vape at a wedding yesterday
May 11, 2025 at 3:55 PM
Reposted by Avril incandenza simp
just had dinner with Bill Maher. let me tell you, the man i met was nothing like the man you see on tv. for starters, he masturbates! i’ve never seen him choke meat before. and he churned it at the dining table, just like the rest of us. I am simply telling you what I saw.
April 26, 2025 at 8:55 PM
Save me Latina little league baseball coach
April 25, 2025 at 5:13 PM
Downloaded RocketMoney and was really excited to start saving money for paying for too many subscriptions…. Unfortunately I am not a fucking idiot and I was not unnecessarily paying for subscriptions I don’t use
April 11, 2025 at 1:28 AM
No run scored so it’s fine, but if Oneil Cruz played a ground ball as bad as IKF did in the top of the 4th, Greg brown would have been blown up a hospital
April 8, 2025 at 11:42 PM
Pizza Hut is trying out a new guy named “Hutty.” I hate him soooooooooooooooooo much
April 6, 2025 at 6:34 PM
Ji Hwan Bae is a worse baserunner than Stephen hawking
March 30, 2025 at 7:52 PM
If Colin Holderman isn’t dead in one hour, I blow up a hospital
March 30, 2025 at 7:36 PM
W/r/t new Pizza Hut Cheesy Bites Pizza with “Ranch Flight” —
-Catholics shouldn’t be doing the “Pepperoni Ranch” on a Lent Friday
-the chipotle ranch reminds me of Little Caesars buffalo ranch (compliment)
-pepperoni ranch reminds of Little Caesars (derogatory)
-sub marinara for reg ranch
March 29, 2025 at 4:29 AM
Anime pharmaceutical ads are here and they are all over the Tennis Channel
March 26, 2025 at 5:56 PM
Penn and teller fool us trick: making my roommate Muslim
March 23, 2025 at 3:02 AM
*Penn and teller fool us*

Teller breaking vow of silence: why is this guy wearing the first reformed vest?!!?!
March 23, 2025 at 2:58 AM
Interrupting March madness at a crowded bar to AirPlay Penn & Teller Fool Us
March 23, 2025 at 2:57 AM
*Penn and teller fool us*

*I do a really bad trick*

Penn Colette: you didn’t fool us

Me: yes I did you guys paid for my hotel room to just do the “French drop coin vanish”

They give me medal
March 23, 2025 at 2:50 AM
*Penn and teller fool us*

I shoot an audience member in the head! But I bring them back to live

Penn Gillette: I love what you did but I was drinking beeer before this - if you know what I mean? You didn’t fool us 😉 agree?

Uhh I’m killing the audience member again 😋
March 23, 2025 at 2:48 AM
Googling how to make your roommate turn Muslim
March 22, 2025 at 1:01 AM
Buying my roommate a Cameo from Soon-Yin Previn for his birthday
March 20, 2025 at 6:38 PM