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hootiewhatsit.bsky.social
@hootiewhatsit.bsky.social
Owls, reality teev, and laughing at my own jokes. For entertainment purposes only.
Pinned
Hot libs, rise up.
December 1, 2025 at 9:46 PM
Tbh Hillary Duff is the coolest.
November 11, 2025 at 5:17 PM
Chillwave 🩵
October 27, 2025 at 2:52 AM
Tbh I wouldn’t mind getting knuck tats
October 23, 2025 at 3:11 PM
Me: Do you have a small kitchen timer?
Home Depot employee: *Glares*
September 30, 2025 at 6:54 PM
What is actually going on?
September 22, 2025 at 6:03 AM
This is me now
September 1, 2025 at 6:47 AM
“Wet socks are forever. Everyday.”
August 19, 2025 at 4:48 PM
Ah nothing like a post-run stogie.
July 23, 2025 at 8:56 PM
Got locked in my favorite restaurant’s bathroom for 15 minutes 😢
July 13, 2025 at 3:02 AM
Rejected. Ouch.
June 24, 2025 at 12:01 AM
A warm welcome to our new robot vacuum, Joe Dirt!
June 10, 2025 at 12:56 AM
Mom to her teenage daughter: “what should we do now? Should we go to the arboretum and walk around?”
Teenage daughter: “I want to party.”
June 7, 2025 at 6:29 AM
Was not expecting The All-American Rejects, a band I’ve never liked, to come back from the dead and become the coolest band in the world by going on a house party tour.

GOD BLESS THE ALL-AMERICAN REJECTS 🫡 🇺🇸🦅
June 2, 2025 at 5:12 PM
Reposted
Sometimes dogs are great and sometimes you need a new screen door because a squirrel was on your porch.
May 13, 2025 at 4:29 PM
More owl legs
May 12, 2025 at 2:35 PM
New pope who dis? #popeleo
May 8, 2025 at 6:06 PM
No context notes app
April 30, 2025 at 5:12 PM
Forever grateful to Joe Pera for reframing the task of refilling the ice cube tray. #joepera #icecubesformyboys
April 26, 2025 at 12:25 AM
Together we can put an end to barrel jeans.
April 18, 2025 at 2:47 PM
“You’ll never get a noise complaint if you have good taste in music.” -Gabby Windey
April 18, 2025 at 4:09 AM
Not naming her Sammi Sweetheart is my biggest regret. 💔 #sweetestbyoullevermeet
April 11, 2025 at 6:50 PM
1994 "Mall Madness" game commercial
YouTube video by lugnutsoldcrap
youtu.be
March 23, 2025 at 10:47 PM
I am Technotronic’s number one fan in 2025

youtu.be/2NbpHP0dDA0?...
Technotronic - Move This
YouTube video by TechnotronicVEVO
youtu.be
March 23, 2025 at 1:51 AM
Wait…so…

do you lock your roommate’s cat in the bathroom with you when you shower? Or do you leave the bathroom door open when you shower?

Either way it’s weird.
March 14, 2025 at 12:04 AM