Herne
@herne.bsky.social
Ranting Canadian, Print Designer & Production Curmudgeon, and Occasional Smartass. Mostly here for the dog, cat, and baby goat pics… Opinions are my own.
Pinned
Herne
@herne.bsky.social
· Feb 1
Canada does not negotiate with terrorists.
You know why it's taking so long?
Satan doesn't want him either.
Satan doesn't want him either.
December 13, 2025 at 12:58 AM
You know why it's taking so long?
Satan doesn't want him either.
Satan doesn't want him either.
Oh… it looks like the government sent me some money last night!
I better spend it before they decide to take it back.
I better spend it before they decide to take it back.
December 12, 2025 at 5:30 PM
Oh… it looks like the government sent me some money last night!
I better spend it before they decide to take it back.
I better spend it before they decide to take it back.
Maybe it'll happen tomorrow.
December 10, 2025 at 11:40 PM
Maybe it'll happen tomorrow.
Why does my face have to keep growing hair? So annoying.
December 10, 2025 at 8:50 PM
Why does my face have to keep growing hair? So annoying.
Fastest FB Marketplace sale I ever made…
Put up a folding travel easel for sale and it was gone 75 minutes later…
Now I wonder if I under-priced it… 😜
Put up a folding travel easel for sale and it was gone 75 minutes later…
Now I wonder if I under-priced it… 😜
December 8, 2025 at 3:03 AM
Fastest FB Marketplace sale I ever made…
Put up a folding travel easel for sale and it was gone 75 minutes later…
Now I wonder if I under-priced it… 😜
Put up a folding travel easel for sale and it was gone 75 minutes later…
Now I wonder if I under-priced it… 😜
FIFA awards first peace prize!
December 8, 2025 at 2:39 AM
FIFA awards first peace prize!
Someone on FB Marketplace interested in the bike I'm selling for brother…
This will be the FIFTH attempt at someone buying it and either, changing their mind, not reading the ad and assuming it's electric, or just not showing up.
Five times lucky?
This will be the FIFTH attempt at someone buying it and either, changing their mind, not reading the ad and assuming it's electric, or just not showing up.
Five times lucky?
December 7, 2025 at 8:42 PM
Someone on FB Marketplace interested in the bike I'm selling for brother…
This will be the FIFTH attempt at someone buying it and either, changing their mind, not reading the ad and assuming it's electric, or just not showing up.
Five times lucky?
This will be the FIFTH attempt at someone buying it and either, changing their mind, not reading the ad and assuming it's electric, or just not showing up.
Five times lucky?
SIL said she was ordering pizza for my brother's dinner, so I ordered pizza too and she grabbed both at the same time and dropped mine off…
Win-Win!
Win-Win!
December 7, 2025 at 2:13 AM
SIL said she was ordering pizza for my brother's dinner, so I ordered pizza too and she grabbed both at the same time and dropped mine off…
Win-Win!
Win-Win!
Rando dude, a bit scruffy-looking & emanating a certain odour, knocks on my door…
Dude: Heya… is Bud here?
Me: Bud?
Dude: Oh, sorry. I think I have the wrong apt. *walks away*
Dude… This is Canada and pot is legal here. We don't need to use code words like "bud" any more. Plus I don't have any.
Dude: Heya… is Bud here?
Me: Bud?
Dude: Oh, sorry. I think I have the wrong apt. *walks away*
Dude… This is Canada and pot is legal here. We don't need to use code words like "bud" any more. Plus I don't have any.
December 6, 2025 at 7:33 PM
Rando dude, a bit scruffy-looking & emanating a certain odour, knocks on my door…
Dude: Heya… is Bud here?
Me: Bud?
Dude: Oh, sorry. I think I have the wrong apt. *walks away*
Dude… This is Canada and pot is legal here. We don't need to use code words like "bud" any more. Plus I don't have any.
Dude: Heya… is Bud here?
Me: Bud?
Dude: Oh, sorry. I think I have the wrong apt. *walks away*
Dude… This is Canada and pot is legal here. We don't need to use code words like "bud" any more. Plus I don't have any.
Our current timeline sucks. Can we re-load a previous saved game now?
December 5, 2025 at 3:06 AM
Our current timeline sucks. Can we re-load a previous saved game now?
Graphic Artists: Most of us just call this "white," Jim.
Jim: Yeah, but who's gonna pay $99.95 for "white"?!
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/04/s...
Jim: Yeah, but who's gonna pay $99.95 for "white"?!
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/04/s...
Pantone’s 2026 Color of the Year Is ‘Cloud Dancer’
www.nytimes.com
December 4, 2025 at 10:39 PM
Graphic Artists: Most of us just call this "white," Jim.
Jim: Yeah, but who's gonna pay $99.95 for "white"?!
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/04/s...
Jim: Yeah, but who's gonna pay $99.95 for "white"?!
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/04/s...
I didn't win the lottery again!
I WANT TO SEE THE MANAGER!
I DEMAND A REFUND!
It's up to $70 million this week… eesh.
I only need $1 million! C'MON!
I WANT TO SEE THE MANAGER!
I DEMAND A REFUND!
It's up to $70 million this week… eesh.
I only need $1 million! C'MON!
December 4, 2025 at 8:08 PM
I didn't win the lottery again!
I WANT TO SEE THE MANAGER!
I DEMAND A REFUND!
It's up to $70 million this week… eesh.
I only need $1 million! C'MON!
I WANT TO SEE THE MANAGER!
I DEMAND A REFUND!
It's up to $70 million this week… eesh.
I only need $1 million! C'MON!
Special thanks to my cordless electric for dying in the middle of my shave…
I was going to go grocery shopping but I guess I'll be sitting here until the left side of my face grows whiskers again…
I was going to go grocery shopping but I guess I'll be sitting here until the left side of my face grows whiskers again…
December 4, 2025 at 7:59 PM
Special thanks to my cordless electric for dying in the middle of my shave…
I was going to go grocery shopping but I guess I'll be sitting here until the left side of my face grows whiskers again…
I was going to go grocery shopping but I guess I'll be sitting here until the left side of my face grows whiskers again…
Picked the best day to renew my Fallout 1st subscription, eh? #Fallout #Fallout76
December 2, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Picked the best day to renew my Fallout 1st subscription, eh? #Fallout #Fallout76
Some random website emails; "Hey! It's been 2 years since we've seen you! If you don't login within 24 hours then we're going to delete your account."
Dude. If I haven't logged into your site in 2 years you can be pretty sure that (a) I have no idea who you are, and (b) I don't need your service.
Dude. If I haven't logged into your site in 2 years you can be pretty sure that (a) I have no idea who you are, and (b) I don't need your service.
December 2, 2025 at 6:02 AM
Some random website emails; "Hey! It's been 2 years since we've seen you! If you don't login within 24 hours then we're going to delete your account."
Dude. If I haven't logged into your site in 2 years you can be pretty sure that (a) I have no idea who you are, and (b) I don't need your service.
Dude. If I haven't logged into your site in 2 years you can be pretty sure that (a) I have no idea who you are, and (b) I don't need your service.
I've named my fists Captain and Tennille because they're old and love will keep us together.
I've named my fists Hall and Oates because whoa-oh here they come, watch out boy, they'll chew you up
I named my fists Pride and Prejudice, because it is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of two fists must be in want of whupping ass
December 2, 2025 at 1:31 AM
I've named my fists Captain and Tennille because they're old and love will keep us together.
Apparently bros in FB Marketplace still refer to their SO's as "my lady" …
December 1, 2025 at 11:05 PM
Apparently bros in FB Marketplace still refer to their SO's as "my lady" …
How soon until a ghost takes over one of those "AI" toys and we have a real-world Chuckie or M3gan running around? Curious.
December 1, 2025 at 10:22 PM
How soon until a ghost takes over one of those "AI" toys and we have a real-world Chuckie or M3gan running around? Curious.
Today's fun advert for a Web & Graphic Designer mentions, "a digital agency dedicated to bringing back quality craftsmanship and genuine hospitality in the modern age of design."
Then goes on to talk about how you should be able to "leverage AI tools"…
They actually used "bespoke" too…
Then goes on to talk about how you should be able to "leverage AI tools"…
They actually used "bespoke" too…
December 1, 2025 at 7:21 PM
Today's fun advert for a Web & Graphic Designer mentions, "a digital agency dedicated to bringing back quality craftsmanship and genuine hospitality in the modern age of design."
Then goes on to talk about how you should be able to "leverage AI tools"…
They actually used "bespoke" too…
Then goes on to talk about how you should be able to "leverage AI tools"…
They actually used "bespoke" too…
I have eaten dinner… I may have over done it on the Tater Tots but I wanted to finish up the bag… Thank you for your attention on this matter.
December 1, 2025 at 3:03 AM
I have eaten dinner… I may have over done it on the Tater Tots but I wanted to finish up the bag… Thank you for your attention on this matter.
"Donny restricts airspace around Taco Bell"
November 29, 2025 at 11:20 PM
"Donny restricts airspace around Taco Bell"
Looking at Southern Ontario's weather forecast for today reminds me why I left Southern Ontario…
Also Doug Ford, but…
Also Doug Ford, but…
November 28, 2025 at 6:09 PM
Looking at Southern Ontario's weather forecast for today reminds me why I left Southern Ontario…
Also Doug Ford, but…
Also Doug Ford, but…
"Hey Gemini! Do these flowers go with these other flowers over here?"
Gemini: I dunno… Maybe ask the person working behind the counter who has been watching you wander the store talking at your phone for the last 20 minutes?
Gemini: I dunno… Maybe ask the person working behind the counter who has been watching you wander the store talking at your phone for the last 20 minutes?
November 27, 2025 at 7:14 PM
"Hey Gemini! Do these flowers go with these other flowers over here?"
Gemini: I dunno… Maybe ask the person working behind the counter who has been watching you wander the store talking at your phone for the last 20 minutes?
Gemini: I dunno… Maybe ask the person working behind the counter who has been watching you wander the store talking at your phone for the last 20 minutes?
Recruiter: As part of your application we'd like you to take these specs and create a cover for a book…
Me: So you want me to work for free? Why would I do that?
Recruiter: …
Me: Pass. Thanks.
Me: So you want me to work for free? Why would I do that?
Recruiter: …
Me: Pass. Thanks.
November 26, 2025 at 9:31 PM
Recruiter: As part of your application we'd like you to take these specs and create a cover for a book…
Me: So you want me to work for free? Why would I do that?
Recruiter: …
Me: Pass. Thanks.
Me: So you want me to work for free? Why would I do that?
Recruiter: …
Me: Pass. Thanks.
Woke up to no hot water in the building this morning, so I guess my monthly shower is going to be rescheduled…
November 26, 2025 at 7:25 PM
Woke up to no hot water in the building this morning, so I guess my monthly shower is going to be rescheduled…