Hector F Writes
@hectorwrites.bsky.social
Mexican in the UK. Screenwriter and rambler, occasional gig goer and avid reader. Posts the odd sunset.
Let's be friends in Pokémon GO! My Trainer Code is 832096298769!
#PokemonGo
#PokemonGo
December 16, 2025 at 8:59 AM
Let's be friends in Pokémon GO! My Trainer Code is 832096298769!
#PokemonGo
#PokemonGo
Reposted by Hector F Writes
I work from home and do zoom calls with nothing on under the table. I've got it out below while they talk gibberish. It's my way of saying, "Fuck you, your 'target-centric uplifts' and your tedious wankers' bonding sessions at the golf course".
December 8, 2025 at 10:20 PM
I work from home and do zoom calls with nothing on under the table. I've got it out below while they talk gibberish. It's my way of saying, "Fuck you, your 'target-centric uplifts' and your tedious wankers' bonding sessions at the golf course".
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Catch Fesshole Live in Leicester, Luton and Leeds – tickets available now! We’re off to Sweden too, visiting Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm, and bringing Anon Opin to Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
December 9, 2025 at 8:25 AM
Catch Fesshole Live in Leicester, Luton and Leeds – tickets available now! We’re off to Sweden too, visiting Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm, and bringing Anon Opin to Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
Reposted by Hector F Writes
I'm a teacher. Annoying Y11 called Jack wrote "Jack is king" on one of my stationery tubs. After hometime, I changed it to "..is a dickhead." The next day, the kids were all "miss, have you seen this?" Yes. Yes, I have and it can stay there.
December 9, 2025 at 1:20 PM
I'm a teacher. Annoying Y11 called Jack wrote "Jack is king" on one of my stationery tubs. After hometime, I changed it to "..is a dickhead." The next day, the kids were all "miss, have you seen this?" Yes. Yes, I have and it can stay there.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
I taught my children (8 & 11) the 'Mini punch' game, when you see a Mini, you punch the person next to you and say "Mini punch, no return". Mini's used to be rare, now they're everywhere. I'm a very observant driver, this was just an excuse to punch my children.
December 9, 2025 at 3:20 PM
I taught my children (8 & 11) the 'Mini punch' game, when you see a Mini, you punch the person next to you and say "Mini punch, no return". Mini's used to be rare, now they're everywhere. I'm a very observant driver, this was just an excuse to punch my children.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Went to Comedy Store with friends years ago. Friend's wife was sitting right behind me and wouldn't shut up and Paul Merton thought it was me. All night he called me a cunt. To this day I can't have him on tv with switching over. I'm actually anxious even talking about this.
December 9, 2025 at 4:20 PM
Went to Comedy Store with friends years ago. Friend's wife was sitting right behind me and wouldn't shut up and Paul Merton thought it was me. All night he called me a cunt. To this day I can't have him on tv with switching over. I'm actually anxious even talking about this.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
I was in a supermarket and saw someone I knew. I waved and shouted out "Hiya" It was then that I realised I was looking in a large mirror. I'd said hello and waved at my own reflection.
December 9, 2025 at 5:20 PM
I was in a supermarket and saw someone I knew. I waved and shouted out "Hiya" It was then that I realised I was looking in a large mirror. I'd said hello and waved at my own reflection.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Pulled a hottie. At hers I saw an Alcolock on her dresser. I said, "Are you allowed to remove that from your car?" She said, "Why would I use my vibrator in my car?" I tried to explain, which made it worse so she invited me to leave.
December 9, 2025 at 8:20 PM
Pulled a hottie. At hers I saw an Alcolock on her dresser. I said, "Are you allowed to remove that from your car?" She said, "Why would I use my vibrator in my car?" I tried to explain, which made it worse so she invited me to leave.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Come along to Fesshole Live! Tickets available for Leicester, Luton and Leeds. The Sweden Tour includes Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm. We’re also doing Anon Opin in Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
December 10, 2025 at 8:25 AM
Come along to Fesshole Live! Tickets available for Leicester, Luton and Leeds. The Sweden Tour includes Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm. We’re also doing Anon Opin in Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
Reposted by Hector F Writes
After I read the fess about the husband using Magic Erasers on tea mugs, I wondered if they would work on tea stains on my teeth. Asked my dentist first and he laughed so hard he needed to excuse himself from the room. Needless to say: Do not put Magic Erasers in your mouth.
December 10, 2025 at 7:20 PM
After I read the fess about the husband using Magic Erasers on tea mugs, I wondered if they would work on tea stains on my teeth. Asked my dentist first and he laughed so hard he needed to excuse himself from the room. Needless to say: Do not put Magic Erasers in your mouth.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Catch Fesshole Live in Leicester, Luton and Leeds – tickets available now! We’re off to Sweden too, visiting Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm, and bringing Anon Opin to Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
December 11, 2025 at 8:25 AM
Catch Fesshole Live in Leicester, Luton and Leeds – tickets available now! We’re off to Sweden too, visiting Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm, and bringing Anon Opin to Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Husband loves Spotify Wrapped and hates Joni Mitchell. All year i've been playing non-stop Joni on his laptop every Sunday while he's at football. Now we wait.
December 11, 2025 at 6:20 PM
Husband loves Spotify Wrapped and hates Joni Mitchell. All year i've been playing non-stop Joni on his laptop every Sunday while he's at football. Now we wait.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
I am a supply teacher and a lego fan. I locate the class lego box then harvest good part at lunch.
December 11, 2025 at 9:20 PM
I am a supply teacher and a lego fan. I locate the class lego box then harvest good part at lunch.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
My aunt, 80, is so proud of her banana skin and teabag concoction to keep lavender plants healthy, that she tells everyone about it. We don't have the heart to admit that three times every year my wife just replaces the one she keeps killing with banana skins and teabags.
December 7, 2025 at 3:20 PM
My aunt, 80, is so proud of her banana skin and teabag concoction to keep lavender plants healthy, that she tells everyone about it. We don't have the heart to admit that three times every year my wife just replaces the one she keeps killing with banana skins and teabags.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Before I was married, I kept men's names in my phone as <First name> von <Location> like "Bill von Colchester" or "Rob von Enfield." Husband found an old phone of mine w/ 12 David von Somethings and he hasn't spoken to me since. His name is David von <city where we first fucked>.
December 7, 2025 at 6:20 PM
Before I was married, I kept men's names in my phone as <First name> von <Location> like "Bill von Colchester" or "Rob von Enfield." Husband found an old phone of mine w/ 12 David von Somethings and he hasn't spoken to me since. His name is David von <city where we first fucked>.
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I work in a police custody suite, lad came in for dealing cocaine having hidden it on his person. Found a small vial with powder in it and I poured it out on thinking it was gear, turned out to be his dad's ashes. Felt mortified and have always felt terrible over it.
December 3, 2025 at 11:20 AM
I work in a police custody suite, lad came in for dealing cocaine having hidden it on his person. Found a small vial with powder in it and I poured it out on thinking it was gear, turned out to be his dad's ashes. Felt mortified and have always felt terrible over it.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
My 40-year-old wife went to buy champagne for our wedding anniversary dinner. I phoned the off licence after she left, gave a description of her and what she was buying and requested they ask her for ID. She came home absolutely beaming. It's the simple things.
December 3, 2025 at 12:20 PM
My 40-year-old wife went to buy champagne for our wedding anniversary dinner. I phoned the off licence after she left, gave a description of her and what she was buying and requested they ask her for ID. She came home absolutely beaming. It's the simple things.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Worked on a film set where I'd remotely control computers rather than the actors actually use them. During a rehearsal I felt cheeky and turned the main actors screen off and watched him quietly panic he'd crashed an expensive computer right before a take. Never told anyone.
December 3, 2025 at 7:20 PM
Worked on a film set where I'd remotely control computers rather than the actors actually use them. During a rehearsal I felt cheeky and turned the main actors screen off and watched him quietly panic he'd crashed an expensive computer right before a take. Never told anyone.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
As students, went to a party; found a bottle of peach schnapps & my mate & I got smashed. On the way home he tried car door handles. Found one open, he sat in, I gave him a little push, & off he went down a hill, hitting a wall before we scarpered. Sorry original Fiat 500.
December 3, 2025 at 9:20 PM
As students, went to a party; found a bottle of peach schnapps & my mate & I got smashed. On the way home he tried car door handles. Found one open, he sat in, I gave him a little push, & off he went down a hill, hitting a wall before we scarpered. Sorry original Fiat 500.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
I was a dog handler with the police; stopped one night to get a kebab & heard a call over the radio of a stabbing nearby. 30 seconds later a guy got into my unmarked car. They were covered in blood & said "you a taxi, yeah?" as they'd seen the aerials. Nicked.
December 3, 2025 at 10:20 PM
I was a dog handler with the police; stopped one night to get a kebab & heard a call over the radio of a stabbing nearby. 30 seconds later a guy got into my unmarked car. They were covered in blood & said "you a taxi, yeah?" as they'd seen the aerials. Nicked.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Made a starter pack of all the accounts I run on BlueSky - Fesshole, B3ta, Anon Opin, Swearclock, Yore Computer, Random Smash Hits & Clickbait Robot. Make your feed entirely my bullshit. go.bsky.app/Ej3fmNR
December 3, 2025 at 10:57 PM
Made a starter pack of all the accounts I run on BlueSky - Fesshole, B3ta, Anon Opin, Swearclock, Yore Computer, Random Smash Hits & Clickbait Robot. Make your feed entirely my bullshit. go.bsky.app/Ej3fmNR
Reposted by Hector F Writes
I've been sticking googly eyes on bulletin boards, posters, computer screens etc in work for 3 years. There's recently been "flash alerts" at start of shift saying whoever is doing it to stop & HR are getting involved. Do I continue or quit while my identity is still a mystery?
December 4, 2025 at 2:20 PM
I've been sticking googly eyes on bulletin boards, posters, computer screens etc in work for 3 years. There's recently been "flash alerts" at start of shift saying whoever is doing it to stop & HR are getting involved. Do I continue or quit while my identity is still a mystery?
Reposted by Hector F Writes
I once shouted out of my car window "Haha! You life is over!" to what I thought was a wedding outside of a church. I was then smacked by my girlfriend saying "What did you say that for?". It was a funeral. Walton in Essex. Must have been around 2008.
December 5, 2025 at 11:20 AM
I once shouted out of my car window "Haha! You life is over!" to what I thought was a wedding outside of a church. I was then smacked by my girlfriend saying "What did you say that for?". It was a funeral. Walton in Essex. Must have been around 2008.
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Fesshole Live is coming to Leicester, Luton and Leeds – get your tickets now! We’re also taking the show to Sweden (Malmö, Göteborg, Stockholm) and doing Anon Opin in Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
December 6, 2025 at 8:10 AM
Fesshole Live is coming to Leicester, Luton and Leeds – get your tickets now! We’re also taking the show to Sweden (Malmö, Göteborg, Stockholm) and doing Anon Opin in Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
Reposted by Hector F Writes
Picked up sister's kids from school yesterday. One of the moms has put a picture of me outside the school in the parents WhatsApp group, implying I am a nonce. School sent out a beware of strangers text. Absolutely zero support from my sister who finds this extremely funny.
December 6, 2025 at 8:20 AM
Picked up sister's kids from school yesterday. One of the moms has put a picture of me outside the school in the parents WhatsApp group, implying I am a nonce. School sent out a beware of strangers text. Absolutely zero support from my sister who finds this extremely funny.