gwen ☮Ⓐ
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gwen3cfd.bsky.social
gwen ☮Ⓐ
@gwen3cfd.bsky.social
30 followers 94 following 38 posts
Autistic transgirl. I like music a lot.
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gwen3cfd.bsky.social
@quence.bsky.social @dogtimes.bsky.social
Is this anything
Animorphs Parody The spaceship looked like a giant scorpion as it came down. “This is so tubular…” Marco breathed on my left. “Groovy AF.” Cassie added from my right. <I> Don’t be afraid.</I> Came a voice from above. It seemed to echo in my mind, like an otherworldly presence that would cause formatting issues in fanfiction for over a decade. The scorpion shaped spaceship landed in front of us, and out stepped the most bizarre creature I’d ever seen. It was like a centaur, but instead of a mouth, it had a fucked up alien vagina, and instead of a tail, it had a perfect replica of Katana’s sword from Suicide Squad (2016) directed by David Ayer. <I> I am Elfspaceguy.</I> he said, <I>I am an Asdfglight.</I> “My name is Jake,” I said, looking directly into the spaceship’s camera. <I>Tobias,</I> he continued, <I>I am your father.</I> We all looked around. “… who are you talking to?” I asked. <i> Her. </I> We turned around, and behind us was the weird kid who always wore long sleeves, looking overwhelmed and confused. “… did you follow us from the mall?” asked Marco. The kid mumbled something about having asked if he could and no one saying no and how he wasn’t a girl. <I>Keep telling your blahaj that, loser.</I> The alien’s voice sounded out majestically, immediately moving on so the kid couldn’t respond. <I>You have all been brought here by Gamer God so that you can save the universe from the evil aliens, the Flirts, who crawl into your ear and drill through the side of your skull to control your brain. But lucky for you, I have one tool.</I> “Hey, so, why are they called Flirts?” Rachel asked. <I>Because the tool I’m about to give you will allow you to become any animal that you share your life force with. The Flirts are the one species that Asdfglights aren’t reproductively compatible with. That’s what makes them evil.</I> Marco figured it out first. “You’re telling me you want us to fuck animals because you got friendzoned by another alien?” “You mean I get to fuck more AND kill things!?” exclaimed Rachel, eyes wide with excitement, “Let’s do it! In more ways than one!” “That’s animal cruelty! So unhip!” gasped Cassie, “All we need is love but not THAT kind of love!” “I’m in charge since I’m the only one with a one-syllable name.” I interrupted. “First off we need to all be able to become each other. Rachel, you and me will go first.” <I>it doesn’t matter what you do right now,</I> intoned Elfspaceguy, <I>The first book is barely canon anyway.<I>
June 12, 2025 at 7:25 PM