And no amount of food could make this better

Im going to explode

And I wish I could stop this anger ! And do something creative with it ( and not turn it into a binge eating episode )

And I wish I could get sick , I WANT to be sick so that it’s visible.

And I remember things being so simple and easy. I used to just live but now I have to exist. I don’t want to live anymore, I’m not interested in anything I’m here because I’m forced to. I never wanted to be here in the first place. I shouldn’t be here. I take up too much space and it’s tiring..

And then , there’s always these thoughts or voices in the back of my mind ( call it the devil if you will )

You won’t amount to anything!
You’re a loser!

I
do
not
give
a
fuck
anymore

oh no was I too vicious did I let the beast out unmasked did I drop the veil did I become unlikable are you going to leave me decide maybe I deserve death after all

confronted with the humiliation of possessing a physical form