"You should know" is an expression of a desire - someone wishing that you meet their expectations. But it's not communicating those expectations. Tis a sign of folks who can't tell the difference between them feeling upset and someone else doing something wrong. Big red flag.

If they won't tell you a boundary, there's nothing you can do except say "I can't do anything about this if you won't clearly communicate with me." It's not your job to prevent people from ever being angry with you. Tis a joint responsbility to communicate needs and work together from there.

I'm unfollowing everyone, not using it any more

Stop fucking funding the right wing. Substack is the goddamned right wing, we've known it for years, they literally paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to people who drove the trans eliminationist narrative. Stop acting like it's ok to give money to substack.