You’ve made me Google that you fiend. In company so cant listen though

And yet, if you take in your own knife and cut it off, YOU’RE the criminal and need tasered for the safety of the public. Madness

He played cricket for West Lothian, has always been into it

Bizarrely, my sister and BIL were at it (his choice)

Nobody is commuting in Lycra, just as no-one is playing 5-a-sides in a shirt and tie. Context matters.

It was in one of his books

Dave Gormans fault

I can genuinely recall most of the song he did

But more helpfully, his invented Parliamo Glasgow. Saw him when I was wee, that sentence reads

Give us a pound of butter for tomorrow

youtu.be/T_Lk7qivXbw?...

What! Same, holy shit, maybe not 1976 but certainly early to mid 80s. Geezabunnaburrafurtomora!

The lads spend about 10 seconds thrown by it, and resume their harmless chat. Me and the table opposite are all “what happened there?”

I’m all for opposing anti-social behaviour on public transport but soooooo wide of the mark it was embarrassing. He’s frankly lucky he didn’t get a pasting.

The boys are doing fuck all wrong, it’s 19:15! We get to Linlithgow, he is getting off, and goes over to them and gives them a mini lecture about “how to behave properly in public” and the n awkwardly departs, now looking at me for validation. (No thanks mate)

unnecessarily aggressive way. I quietly eat my pasty and sip at my coke. The young lads in the 4-seats behind and opposite are chatting away about the shite lads that age do, but not explicit or really off-colour. He is glowering at them and trying to make eye contact with me in a WTF way

Brazil, Morocco, Haiti, Scotland.

Put it on now, Scotlands pot coming up!

It’s so fucking cringe, just show me who Scotland are gonna get humped by and stop all this pish

Mind you, they can probably spell Cup 🤦🏻