evanstoner.com.web.brid.gy
@evanstoner.com.web.brid.gy
[they are bread, and hammer]
they are bread, and hammer
they are bread, and hammer
February 19, 2026 at 4:10 AM
[they are bread, and hammer]
they are bread, and hammer
they are bread, and hammer
[Wonder Man is the best Marvel show in a while. Highly recommend.]
Wonder Man is the best Marvel show in a while. Highly recommend.
Wonder Man is the best Marvel show in a while. Highly recommend.
February 13, 2026 at 6:47 AM
[Wonder Man is the best Marvel show in a while. Highly recommend.]
Wonder Man is the best Marvel show in a while. Highly recommend.
Wonder Man is the best Marvel show in a while. Highly recommend.
[Was not expecting a Dune-themed ice dance at the Olympics]
Was not expecting a Dune-themed ice dance at the Olympics
Was not expecting a Dune-themed ice dance at the Olympics
February 12, 2026 at 5:09 AM
[Was not expecting a Dune-themed ice dance at the Olympics]
Was not expecting a Dune-themed ice dance at the Olympics
Was not expecting a Dune-themed ice dance at the Olympics
[“The Piña Colada Song?” Doesn’t ring a bell. Oh, you mean The Piña Colada Song’s monster—]
“The Piña Colada Song?” Doesn’t ring a bell. Oh, you mean The Piña Colada Song’s _monster_ —
“The Piña Colada Song?” Doesn’t ring a bell. Oh, you mean The Piña Colada Song’s _monster_ —
February 5, 2026 at 7:59 AM
[“The Piña Colada Song?” Doesn’t ring a bell. Oh, you mean The Piña Colada Song’s monster—]
“The Piña Colada Song?” Doesn’t ring a bell. Oh, you mean The Piña Colada Song’s _monster_ —
“The Piña Colada Song?” Doesn’t ring a bell. Oh, you mean The Piña Colada Song’s _monster_ —
[extremely pleased to learn that Zach Galifianakis will be playing Helen of Troy in Nolan’s Odyssey, establishing pure integrity and objective beauty]
extremely pleased to learn that Zach Galifianakis will be playing Helen of Troy in Nolan’s Odyssey, establishing pure integrity and objective […]
extremely pleased to learn that Zach Galifianakis will be playing Helen of Troy in Nolan’s Odyssey, establishing pure integrity and objective […]
Original post on evanstoner.com
evanstoner.com
February 3, 2026 at 4:12 AM
[extremely pleased to learn that Zach Galifianakis will be playing Helen of Troy in Nolan’s Odyssey, establishing pure integrity and objective beauty]
extremely pleased to learn that Zach Galifianakis will be playing Helen of Troy in Nolan’s Odyssey, establishing pure integrity and objective […]
extremely pleased to learn that Zach Galifianakis will be playing Helen of Troy in Nolan’s Odyssey, establishing pure integrity and objective […]
[If it was possible to claw back $8B in lifesaving foreign aid, and $1B of public media funding, sure seems like we better claw back $180B of DHS money. You know, to run the country like a business.]
If it was possible to claw back $8B in lifesaving foreign aid, and $1B of public media funding […]
If it was possible to claw back $8B in lifesaving foreign aid, and $1B of public media funding […]
Original post on evanstoner.com
evanstoner.com
January 29, 2026 at 7:59 PM
[If it was possible to claw back $8B in lifesaving foreign aid, and $1B of public media funding, sure seems like we better claw back $180B of DHS money. You know, to run the country like a business.]
If it was possible to claw back $8B in lifesaving foreign aid, and $1B of public media funding […]
If it was possible to claw back $8B in lifesaving foreign aid, and $1B of public media funding […]
[“Try that in a small town,” to coin a phrase]
“Try that in a small town,” to coin a phrase
“Try that in a small town,” to coin a phrase
January 28, 2026 at 5:16 AM
[“Try that in a small town,” to coin a phrase]
“Try that in a small town,” to coin a phrase
“Try that in a small town,” to coin a phrase
[The noise cancelling on AirPods Pro is really impressive at blocking out Vengabus specifically.]
The noise cancelling on AirPods Pro is really impressive at blocking out Vengabus specifically.
The noise cancelling on AirPods Pro is really impressive at blocking out Vengabus specifically.
January 27, 2026 at 4:54 AM
[The noise cancelling on AirPods Pro is really impressive at blocking out Vengabus specifically.]
The noise cancelling on AirPods Pro is really impressive at blocking out Vengabus specifically.
The noise cancelling on AirPods Pro is really impressive at blocking out Vengabus specifically.
[What kind of evil piece of shit do you have to be to be cruel to Minnesotans, of all people?]
What kind of evil piece of shit do you have to be to be cruel to Minnesotans, of all people?
What kind of evil piece of shit do you have to be to be cruel to Minnesotans, of all people?
January 23, 2026 at 6:50 PM
[What kind of evil piece of shit do you have to be to be cruel to Minnesotans, of all people?]
What kind of evil piece of shit do you have to be to be cruel to Minnesotans, of all people?
What kind of evil piece of shit do you have to be to be cruel to Minnesotans, of all people?
[oh sure, somebody wants to be called “xe/xir” and it’s crickets, but the second I want to be referred to as “the United States Attorney for the Eastern District of Virginia” everybody’s all like “no you’re not” and “that’s illegal”]
oh sure, somebody wants to be called “xe/xir” and it’s […]
oh sure, somebody wants to be called “xe/xir” and it’s […]
Original post on evanstoner.com
evanstoner.com
January 21, 2026 at 10:05 AM
[oh sure, somebody wants to be called “xe/xir” and it’s crickets, but the second I want to be referred to as “the United States Attorney for the Eastern District of Virginia” everybody’s all like “no you’re not” and “that’s illegal”]
oh sure, somebody wants to be called “xe/xir” and it’s […]
oh sure, somebody wants to be called “xe/xir” and it’s […]
[Canadian bus.]
Canadian bus.
Canadian bus.
January 18, 2026 at 11:01 PM
[Canadian bus.]
Canadian bus.
Canadian bus.
[The optimal Yelp review.]
The optimal Yelp review.
The optimal Yelp review.
January 18, 2026 at 5:33 AM
[The optimal Yelp review.]
The optimal Yelp review.
The optimal Yelp review.
[“We want to thank you all for coming out to the show this Tuesday night. We are Asexual Deepfake, and we are here to rock your face! One two three” [power chords]]
“We want to thank you all for coming out to the show this Tuesday night. We are Asexual Deepfake, and we are here to rock your […]
“We want to thank you all for coming out to the show this Tuesday night. We are Asexual Deepfake, and we are here to rock your […]
Original post on evanstoner.com
evanstoner.com
January 9, 2026 at 7:36 PM
[“We want to thank you all for coming out to the show this Tuesday night. We are Asexual Deepfake, and we are here to rock your face! One two three” [power chords]]
“We want to thank you all for coming out to the show this Tuesday night. We are Asexual Deepfake, and we are here to rock your […]
“We want to thank you all for coming out to the show this Tuesday night. We are Asexual Deepfake, and we are here to rock your […]
[Truncated to clarify the editorial position.]
Truncated to clarify the editorial position.
Truncated to clarify the editorial position.
January 9, 2026 at 6:10 AM
[Truncated to clarify the editorial position.]
Truncated to clarify the editorial position.
Truncated to clarify the editorial position.
[I’ve long thought of myself as having grown up surrounded by hicks.
What I’ve just realized is that I was the hick, and I was surrounded by degens.
I appreciate your support at this time.]
I’ve long thought of myself as having grown up surrounded by hicks.
What I’ve just realized is that I […]
What I’ve just realized is that I was the hick, and I was surrounded by degens.
I appreciate your support at this time.]
I’ve long thought of myself as having grown up surrounded by hicks.
What I’ve just realized is that I […]
Original post on evanstoner.com
evanstoner.com
January 6, 2026 at 10:17 PM
[I’ve long thought of myself as having grown up surrounded by hicks.
What I’ve just realized is that I was the hick, and I was surrounded by degens.
I appreciate your support at this time.]
I’ve long thought of myself as having grown up surrounded by hicks.
What I’ve just realized is that I […]
What I’ve just realized is that I was the hick, and I was surrounded by degens.
I appreciate your support at this time.]
I’ve long thought of myself as having grown up surrounded by hicks.
What I’ve just realized is that I […]
[The banality of whatever this shit is.]
The banality of whatever this shit is.
The banality of whatever this shit is.
January 4, 2026 at 1:26 AM
[The banality of whatever this shit is.]
The banality of whatever this shit is.
The banality of whatever this shit is.
[HOW DO THEY KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT OUR INSANE CLOWN POSSES]
HOW DO THEY KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT OUR INSANE CLOWN POSSES
HOW DO THEY KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT OUR INSANE CLOWN POSSES
December 19, 2025 at 6:19 AM
[HOW DO THEY KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT OUR INSANE CLOWN POSSES]
HOW DO THEY KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT OUR INSANE CLOWN POSSES
HOW DO THEY KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT OUR INSANE CLOWN POSSES
[Looks like it’s time for another Old World Christmas.]
Looks like it’s time for another Old World Christmas.
Looks like it’s time for another Old World Christmas.
December 19, 2025 at 6:19 AM
[Looks like it’s time for another Old World Christmas.]
Looks like it’s time for another Old World Christmas.
Looks like it’s time for another Old World Christmas.
[Gwen: did you know that electric eels can generate 860V of electricity, enough to kill a horse
Me: I did not! Did you know that Blanka in Street Fighter was raised by electric eels
G: yes because you tell me that all the time]
Gwen: did you know that electric eels can generate 860V of […]
Me: I did not! Did you know that Blanka in Street Fighter was raised by electric eels
G: yes because you tell me that all the time]
Gwen: did you know that electric eels can generate 860V of […]
Original post on evanstoner.com
evanstoner.com
December 6, 2025 at 12:25 AM
[Gwen: did you know that electric eels can generate 860V of electricity, enough to kill a horse
Me: I did not! Did you know that Blanka in Street Fighter was raised by electric eels
G: yes because you tell me that all the time]
Gwen: did you know that electric eels can generate 860V of […]
Me: I did not! Did you know that Blanka in Street Fighter was raised by electric eels
G: yes because you tell me that all the time]
Gwen: did you know that electric eels can generate 860V of […]
[Sorry to this man.]
Sorry to this man.
Sorry to this man.
November 4, 2025 at 6:54 PM
[Sorry to this man.]
Sorry to this man.
Sorry to this man.
[Meanwhile, on etymonline]
Meanwhile, on etymonline
Meanwhile, on etymonline
October 19, 2025 at 7:04 PM
[Meanwhile, on etymonline]
Meanwhile, on etymonline
Meanwhile, on etymonline
[Hearing my kid coordinate with the other 8th graders via her watch right now]
Hearing my kid coordinate with the other 8th graders via her watch right now
Hearing my kid coordinate with the other 8th graders via her watch right now
October 18, 2025 at 7:20 PM
[Hearing my kid coordinate with the other 8th graders via her watch right now]
Hearing my kid coordinate with the other 8th graders via her watch right now
Hearing my kid coordinate with the other 8th graders via her watch right now
[Six years ago today, I accepted a slice of “jello shot birthday cake” from some rando at a longshoreman’s bar.
And that has made all the difference.]
Six years ago today, I accepted a slice of “jello shot birthday cake” from some rando at a longshoreman’s […]
[Original post on evanstoner.com]
And that has made all the difference.]
Six years ago today, I accepted a slice of “jello shot birthday cake” from some rando at a longshoreman’s […]
[Original post on evanstoner.com]
September 30, 2025 at 2:06 AM
[Six years ago today, I accepted a slice of “jello shot birthday cake” from some rando at a longshoreman’s bar.
And that has made all the difference.]
Six years ago today, I accepted a slice of “jello shot birthday cake” from some rando at a longshoreman’s […]
[Original post on evanstoner.com]
And that has made all the difference.]
Six years ago today, I accepted a slice of “jello shot birthday cake” from some rando at a longshoreman’s […]
[Original post on evanstoner.com]
[Mr. President, we demand that you release the Elvis files.]
Mr. President, we demand that you release the Elvis files.
Mr. President, we demand that you release the Elvis files.
September 27, 2025 at 10:42 PM
[Mr. President, we demand that you release the Elvis files.]
Mr. President, we demand that you release the Elvis files.
Mr. President, we demand that you release the Elvis files.