Tonight is my annual screening of Dune, where I put on the 1990s film Tremors and then scream at my guests through tears that they don't know what Dune really is

One day I went to the zoo and an elephant backed up to the edge of its enclosure and ripped ass 6 feet away from my face. I saw the face of God and it was a winking asshole the size of a manhole cover

Made a Shepherds Pie

Felt sad. Made tacos.

I need to start cooking dinner but unfortunately my cat has curled up in my lap and is now a sleepy weepy lil baby yes she is (send help)

Everyone brings up the trolley problem like they'd get to control the lever but unfortunately we're on the track and the lever is in the hands of capitalists

Each of the Legend of Zelda games offer useful life lessons:
-BotW/TotK taught me that no problem only has one solution
-Wind Waker made me want to see the world
-Twilight Princess made me realize I was into pet play
-Majoras Mask showed me that there's always hope in the darkest times.

You know I'm suddenly remembering the Nestle CEO once said that water wasn't a human right. No particular reason why I'm thinking about this.

If God made me in His image, then he's got a dump truck with ass hair thick enough to braid

Very important picture of my cat

People get too self conscious about posting their Spotify Wrapped. "Oh do people really want to see this?" Yes, I want to see it. I want to judge(respectfully). Spotify Wrapped is my Grammys.

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Can more queer people interact with my account please I don't want to see a straight person ever again