4 year old: mommy, I did my best to draw you.
Me: aww, thanks buddy!
4 year old: you look like a drawer

Just taught my toddler daughter to say “Dame Maggie Smith,” so if you were wondering what to put on my gravestone now you know

Is a side effect of lead poisoning blaming your kids for everything in perpetuity? Because that would explain a few things

God bless the group chats /
With silly names /
Without them, us women /
We would go insane /
God bless the gossip /
The memes and reaccs /
God bless our lifeline /
The humble group chat

A small museum says all but one sponsor of a Girls in STEM event backed out, fearing retaliation from the Trump administration over "DEI." Evan Kruegel reports for @nexton9news.bsky.social. www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zg1n...

"I am the law."
Hitler, 1942

"There is no law but the law of the people & the people are me."
Gaddafi, 1975

"We have a constitution, but we must address the problems of the country first. The law is always behind when it comes to national survival."
Bashar Al-Assad, 2011

Trump, 2025:

I would really like it if my phone could secretly listen to me and start recording, but only ever and specifically when I’m making up an awesome song in the shower that I’ll never remember by the time I get out.

How do you know your kids are in their Pokémon era? When your three year old tells you, “mommy, a pine cone evolves into a tree!”