Lots and lots of talking. How does the M/s impact the poly? What feels good or bad with the current versions of our bodies? Where can we feel more whole? What are we curious about?

We’ve had many of these talks before but we don’t come back and revisit as we change.

Sir and I got a lot of intimate time, including a deeply cathartic scene. His knuckles were literally bruised & battered, so were my back & shoulders. But I finally let some things go. It was ugly and hard and not the last of the work, but I felt so much lighter in the morning.

Coming to accept it’s not just Sir that sees me as part of the leather community. That I can wear my Wescos and leathergirl pin without being called a poser.

A conversation about imposter syndrome with folks I hold dear helped me use the words.

Seeing a woman who I don’t know well, but Sir does, be capped was lovely. The outpouring of love for her, the gratitude for her being in people’s lives was moving.

A workshop on perimenopause and how it impacts M/s was so affirming. Women sharing their experiences from an honest place tied with science have me a lot to think about. There was a lot about stepping into personal power here.

Many of the workshops I did attend were great.

We attended a long term (10+ years) intensive which was the instructors and 2 other couples. It was fantastic because of the intimacy and openness. All of us in different places but able to share the highs and lows.

We kept to our goal of minimal planning and it was fine. We didn’t attend every class slot and we didn’t force social meals. We enjoyed time together and with friends even if it meant we missed events.

We prioritized our own needs over the schedule. That was lovely.

Which I could love this more than once. It’s a trap I catch myself in sometimes, about pretty reference material instead of deeper understanding. I don’t absorb the info (and tbh don’t often return to it!). It’s the practice that matters.