I'm using a janky ol' version of PDF Xchange because even the schmancy paid version of Adobe couldn't handle page counts the size I was mashing together like a maniac. It mostly leaves you alone as long as you're fine with having a big Xchange Seal of Cheapskatery™ watermarked on your pages.

A great book with so much going on! Can't wait for the next one!

The *vast* majority of sales come through Amazon. And when readers boycott Amazon, they don't in general shift to buying indie books elsewhere. They simply stop buying indie books.

I detest Amazon, but as a self-published author, I simply cannot have a career without publishing there.

2/2

7/8 here, but only because I'm fortunate enough not to have any relatives in care homes. I don't know many people who'd attest to my womanhood but I am genuinely honoured.

(since somebody asked elsewhere already, I am of course aware that Brett "Roy Kent" Goldstein and Lee "Agent Stone" Majdoub are different guys; I just thought the similarity in their excellent facial hair and the amusing difference in their demeanors made them fun candidates for this meme)

Oh, we like a challenge around here! Thank you for all your stories 🖤

Couldn't you just type out the words "one" and "nine hundred and ninety-nine thousand, nine hundred and ninety nine" then use maths to figure out how long it would take you to type an average of those a million times, and now I write this I realise it's just a typing speed record he was after.

What's happened today specifically? I pay as little attention to the USian clown parade as my mental health demands.

Confirmed, someone in Finland is wearing your merch and feeling pretty smug about it.

Ooo, I do love tahini although I mostly use it for hummus. And is that a star anise? What else goes in there, come on, make with the recipe I'm not here for a haircut Aster.

Also, hi Aster.

My stupid shirt is inbound, I just paid a giant wad of tax on it because it's a fucking free-for-all out there except nothing's actually fucking free.

Anyway worth it. And the book is brilliant.

This has big "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve" energy and it put a smile on my face.

I like your enthusiasm but your (I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and say copy-pasted) messaging could use some personalisation. I liked the one you sent to the funko pop maker about their book.