This is kind of fakey but so freaking hot

OMG yes plz

I just learned that my uncle got me a pacifier as a baby whose sucking side was phallic shaped.

Apparently I loved it.

Wouldn't it be nice if all hobbies had as sexy results as the exercising hobby?

With all the technological advancements of the past few years, how far are we from sex robots? Because I would like a sex robot please.

Not a fuck machine, not a stroker, a full-body sex robot.

The first picture here has made it into my All Time Favorites collection. Ho. Ly. Crud that's beautiful.

There is an 80-something woman here at the gym who is going up and talking to all the swole gym bros #lifegoals

Reflections on my Atlantis Cruise:

I knew before I left that this was going to be a Life Landmark Experience. It was that, but not in the way I expected.

I was curious whether kiwi birds have wings, and the AI answer came with this highly scientific illustration.

Repost is you love big round hairy butts. … this is mine. 🍑

New shirt

It's @mechabobzilla.bsky.social's fault

I can now confirm that prison loaf is as bad as everyone says.

Jokes to be retired in 2024:

Thanksgiving double entendres about "stuffing"

July 4 double entendres about "fireworks"

Xmas jokes about "coming down the chimney," where "chimney" is meant as a stand in for any given body part

Easter jokes with "He is risen" to mean that somebody has an erection

Can I play the F.C.F. game, guys?

Me: I have a huge crush on X. He's so sexy!

Someone who will remain anonymous: You sure? He's got really low self esteem and a bit of a drinking problem.

Me: (to myself) this is going to be easy!

And it WAS.