kelley 🎟️
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dourkiwi.bsky.social
kelley 🎟️
@dourkiwi.bsky.social
you trying to take away my constitutional right to be hilarious?
January 9, 2026 at 10:39 PM
also spoke w/ a therapist again, she thinks it’s just ADHD and not ASD. well you’ve never seen me have to sit in silence for two hours after a costco trip amy
January 9, 2026 at 6:14 PM
I WANT M*RIJUANA SO BAD RN ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY
January 9, 2026 at 6:13 PM
hey kitty girl it’s your world
December 31, 2025 at 6:06 PM
accurate representation of the dude who took out my stitches
December 30, 2025 at 11:31 PM
my sister is pregnant and this is one of the images they captured of the baby 💀
December 29, 2025 at 7:09 AM
no one could make me care about timmy c and his performance in Marty Supreme. i’m actually actively tired of shitty men doing shitty man things as a movie
December 27, 2025 at 1:38 AM
me: i have a lot of anxiety

psychiatrist: so we’re gonna give you new anxiety meds and up your lexapro

me: you’re never going to believe this but i have anxiety about taking medication :)

her: i see………
December 24, 2025 at 5:05 PM
who gave the inquisitor a g*n
December 12, 2025 at 6:14 AM
now that i’m 30 i decided that i won’t be trying to hide my grays by coloring my hair because For Why
December 2, 2025 at 12:00 AM
spent thanksgiving in vegas for my 30th, kinda fun!?
November 29, 2025 at 7:01 AM
back to square one 🚬
November 22, 2025 at 2:51 AM
princess violet
November 21, 2025 at 7:44 PM
to do list
💩 fold laundry
💩 do dishes
💩 deep clean litter boxes
💩 deep clean bathroom
💩 tidy room
November 16, 2025 at 9:05 PM
put up the tree criminally early but the cats are fascinated
November 11, 2025 at 5:31 PM
welp the same cat who gave us jinx & violet returned with more babies 🥹
November 11, 2025 at 5:29 PM
day 1 of giving up daily smoking, feeling kinda nervoussssss
November 3, 2025 at 4:23 PM
MY SISTER IS PREGNANT AND I GET TO BE AN AUNT
November 1, 2025 at 3:25 PM
found my boss’s boss’s boss on tiktok schilling tiktok shop garbage. guess even the execs have side hustles
October 24, 2025 at 5:25 PM
me: i hate body horror, im just too sensitive now

me:

me: [puts on movies with body horror]
October 24, 2025 at 1:09 AM
making the two hot firefighters half-brothers in the spinoff 9-1-1 is homophobic and absolutely does not stop people from shipping them
October 17, 2025 at 5:49 AM
unless buck and eddie and fucking raw on my tv screen and they find bobby in space, i will Not be watching 9-1-1
October 10, 2025 at 3:06 PM
lrt i love being a part of the coastal elite
October 9, 2025 at 2:30 AM
Reposted by kelley 🎟️
California passes law requiring social media companies to remove your personal data when you delete your account 📱
October 9, 2025 at 1:38 AM
i work an office and my coworker just started playing the tswift album on a speaker. should i report this to HR as a hostile work environment
October 3, 2025 at 5:16 PM