detective jj bittenbinder
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dexilemeis.bsky.social
detective jj bittenbinder
@dexilemeis.bsky.social
I’m going insane, do you guys need anything?
My latest contribution to the household
April 3, 2025 at 8:00 PM
Bristol’s bed head is KILLING me
March 21, 2025 at 2:04 PM
Here’s what y’all’s nephews did at Peanut Butter Picasso Day at daycare
March 6, 2025 at 6:16 PM
Here’s what y’all’s nephews brought home from their daycare Mardi Paws party
March 4, 2025 at 10:02 PM
Stop calling me and cussing me out. This is who you’re being mean to
March 3, 2025 at 4:55 PM
Yeah good luck girlypop that’s how I ended up paying $30/mo to watch these stupid himbos piss me off 2-4x/week. Started as a bit bc the goalie’s cute and now I’m about to start billing the whole organization for blood pressure medication
February 25, 2025 at 6:15 AM
I love texting my dad. He’ll send 2-3 texts like this or just a couple emojis then I won’t hear from him for the rest of the day
February 18, 2025 at 12:46 PM
Also one of the many hilarious tweets about Marchy scoring and getting cheered in Montreal
February 13, 2025 at 3:16 AM
Ahem. ARF ARF ARF ARF 🐶
February 13, 2025 at 2:38 AM
A bunch of us got little Texas themed tattoos on a whim yesterday and I keep forgetting I have it so I always get a nice laugh when I remember it exists
February 3, 2025 at 5:22 AM
Going through all the bills up in the statehouse this week and the Republicans are so goddamn tapped
January 28, 2025 at 5:06 AM
Grabbed a tag from the humane society giving tree at the boys daycare and this is our lucky recipient. Enjoy your toys, Edward
December 10, 2024 at 12:58 AM
Chewy sent a painting of Coconut as a sympathy gift 🥺
December 4, 2024 at 8:12 PM
(Sry if you already saw this on Twitter) So we picked our operation Santa letters and the little girl said she wants “an American girl mega bloks set” bc hers broke. There’s a bunch of different sets but if you were me would you assume the she meant is this house over the art studio and music fest?
December 4, 2024 at 5:12 AM
New Christmas harnesses just dropped
December 3, 2024 at 10:12 PM
I also found this vibe (sans stupid hats) which I love but I have to find the right sweater that’ll also be here in time which is gonna be a challenge 🤠
November 21, 2024 at 3:38 PM
Same tbh
November 16, 2024 at 4:37 AM
Obviously there’s still more positions but we’d really be getting in the weeds on characters at this point
November 16, 2024 at 2:39 AM
Oh my god the frogs have hats
November 14, 2024 at 3:20 AM
I’m about to pretend my internet went out to leave work early because everyone’s acting like a damn cat in a bathtub
November 13, 2024 at 8:09 PM
Shoutout to Chewy
November 12, 2024 at 4:28 AM
It’s Pokey’s 3rd birthday and I had to hold his birthday cheeseburger behind the camera to get him to sit still
November 12, 2024 at 1:43 AM
I love these frogs so much. I don’t think they even know they exist
November 9, 2024 at 3:42 AM
This dog doesn’t have a single thought behind those eyes and quite frankly I love him for that
November 8, 2024 at 9:04 PM
Me rn
November 8, 2024 at 3:39 PM