DeeDee McDoombagel
@deedeemcdoombagel.bsky.social
Fanfic writer but never actually shares unless bribed. Writer of original things, too, but never shares unless dead.
She/Her | 30-something | So bi they used me to anchor the center of the old Kinsey scale
She/Her | 30-something | So bi they used me to anchor the center of the old Kinsey scale
Wew lads I survived port lmao
December 29, 2023 at 10:06 AM
Wew lads I survived port lmao
"DeeDee, we need you to mediate this dispute" wHY? I am the least well-adjusted person in this entire flock, how is it that I am the one telling people to cool their shit down and talk together.
Is it the cray? It has to be. Mad Sage? Idk, I just work here, please make peace, I love you all
Is it the cray? It has to be. Mad Sage? Idk, I just work here, please make peace, I love you all
December 29, 2023 at 12:49 AM
"DeeDee, we need you to mediate this dispute" wHY? I am the least well-adjusted person in this entire flock, how is it that I am the one telling people to cool their shit down and talk together.
Is it the cray? It has to be. Mad Sage? Idk, I just work here, please make peace, I love you all
Is it the cray? It has to be. Mad Sage? Idk, I just work here, please make peace, I love you all
Shit it's time for Deep Talk, I must go, my people need me
December 28, 2023 at 11:29 PM
Shit it's time for Deep Talk, I must go, my people need me
There's a blue owl stress toy by my computer and I've suddenly remembered it looks like the duolingo owl and I fear for my life
December 28, 2023 at 10:59 PM
There's a blue owl stress toy by my computer and I've suddenly remembered it looks like the duolingo owl and I fear for my life
Do you ever go to drink water and just miss your whole mouth entirely and end up with wet shoulder and damp cheek
December 28, 2023 at 10:41 PM
Do you ever go to drink water and just miss your whole mouth entirely and end up with wet shoulder and damp cheek
The blue light is bothering me. Turns out it's just the internet machine doing its usual business, but I sat here, frozen, for a few minutes, side-eyeing it and wondering what it was up to, that it dared make a blue light in my presence
December 28, 2023 at 10:38 PM
The blue light is bothering me. Turns out it's just the internet machine doing its usual business, but I sat here, frozen, for a few minutes, side-eyeing it and wondering what it was up to, that it dared make a blue light in my presence
Now hiring: Chickens who have degrees in Egyptian Aramaic, who can interpret my handwritten shopping list, because I can't decipher what "derdkilkesty" is supposed to mean
December 28, 2023 at 10:24 PM
Now hiring: Chickens who have degrees in Egyptian Aramaic, who can interpret my handwritten shopping list, because I can't decipher what "derdkilkesty" is supposed to mean
Normal thoughts: I should hide the toilet roll on the table in case random maintenance people show up in the middle of the night and see it and think I am using it for nefarious purposes
December 28, 2023 at 10:20 PM
Normal thoughts: I should hide the toilet roll on the table in case random maintenance people show up in the middle of the night and see it and think I am using it for nefarious purposes
"Haha you disappointed the hell out of your family, permanently, by [checks notes] getting them small but thoughtful gifts. You absolute loser. You asshole. How dare."
December 28, 2023 at 10:16 PM
"Haha you disappointed the hell out of your family, permanently, by [checks notes] getting them small but thoughtful gifts. You absolute loser. You asshole. How dare."
My job skills include abruptly scream-weeping because I'm wrapping presents
December 28, 2023 at 10:13 PM
My job skills include abruptly scream-weeping because I'm wrapping presents
Authors who can pin down expressions and body language in a natural way have all my jealousy, I have to go look up charts and shit to get a normal flow of expression, I cannot just look at a whole person and go, "Yes we could tell they were upset by the way their shoulders went weird"
December 28, 2023 at 9:52 PM
Authors who can pin down expressions and body language in a natural way have all my jealousy, I have to go look up charts and shit to get a normal flow of expression, I cannot just look at a whole person and go, "Yes we could tell they were upset by the way their shoulders went weird"
"What kinds of vegetables do you like" is such an oddly-specific question out of nowhere and anyone else might have figured, "Oh, it's part of a gift of vegetable box for crimbo" but not me, no. Am just here like, "Oh, you are interested in my weird obsession with sauteed zucchini, cool"
December 28, 2023 at 9:50 PM
"What kinds of vegetables do you like" is such an oddly-specific question out of nowhere and anyone else might have figured, "Oh, it's part of a gift of vegetable box for crimbo" but not me, no. Am just here like, "Oh, you are interested in my weird obsession with sauteed zucchini, cool"
If a welder called Carter burns himself, do his colleagues ever stop making jokes about how he cauterized the wound, or
December 28, 2023 at 9:45 PM
If a welder called Carter burns himself, do his colleagues ever stop making jokes about how he cauterized the wound, or
You ever just make toast for a homeless fella and then spend 10 minutes on your porch eating toast with him because he's honestly cracking good company and he also believes in wildly delusional shit
December 28, 2023 at 9:24 PM
You ever just make toast for a homeless fella and then spend 10 minutes on your porch eating toast with him because he's honestly cracking good company and he also believes in wildly delusional shit
"Hey DeeDee you should try arts and crafts to explore new hobbies and relax from stress"
The arts and crafts:
The arts and crafts:
December 28, 2023 at 9:02 PM
"Hey DeeDee you should try arts and crafts to explore new hobbies and relax from stress"
The arts and crafts:
The arts and crafts:
I promise I am not laughing at you because your cat died; it's just that you told me this in a crowded room, & I am trying to mirror the fuck out of social interaction to appear normal, and also I can't hear you and all I heard was "my cat" so I assumed it was a fun kitty story, I'm so sorry oh god
December 28, 2023 at 8:58 PM
I promise I am not laughing at you because your cat died; it's just that you told me this in a crowded room, & I am trying to mirror the fuck out of social interaction to appear normal, and also I can't hear you and all I heard was "my cat" so I assumed it was a fun kitty story, I'm so sorry oh god
Please help I can't stop building volcanoes in a 1990s-era volcanology program
December 28, 2023 at 8:44 PM
Please help I can't stop building volcanoes in a 1990s-era volcanology program
I love my friends. That's it, that's the post.
December 28, 2023 at 8:42 PM
I love my friends. That's it, that's the post.
British TV is a whole other horrifying universe, I had to sit and watch this budget detective show where the opening theme was an Irish jig and the first like 10 minutes were just people talking about their holiday plans until some bloke found ash on a fireplace mantel
December 28, 2023 at 8:35 PM
British TV is a whole other horrifying universe, I had to sit and watch this budget detective show where the opening theme was an Irish jig and the first like 10 minutes were just people talking about their holiday plans until some bloke found ash on a fireplace mantel
"Explain to yourself reasons you are not online."
"I am afraid my discord is GCHQ because this is just deranged life now."
"You're on Bluesky though? Does that not count somehow, or?"
"Yes, but Bluesky is CLEARLY not GCHQ. Goodness, keep up."
"I am afraid my discord is GCHQ because this is just deranged life now."
"You're on Bluesky though? Does that not count somehow, or?"
"Yes, but Bluesky is CLEARLY not GCHQ. Goodness, keep up."
December 28, 2023 at 8:30 PM
"Explain to yourself reasons you are not online."
"I am afraid my discord is GCHQ because this is just deranged life now."
"You're on Bluesky though? Does that not count somehow, or?"
"Yes, but Bluesky is CLEARLY not GCHQ. Goodness, keep up."
"I am afraid my discord is GCHQ because this is just deranged life now."
"You're on Bluesky though? Does that not count somehow, or?"
"Yes, but Bluesky is CLEARLY not GCHQ. Goodness, keep up."
When one of your characters was a mycologist in his past incarnation, and his lieutenant is an archaeologist, and you need to come up with a bar joke but can't because you got distracted by why you chose these specific career paths
December 28, 2023 at 8:23 PM
When one of your characters was a mycologist in his past incarnation, and his lieutenant is an archaeologist, and you need to come up with a bar joke but can't because you got distracted by why you chose these specific career paths
Helena Bonham Carter's best role was as Lady Totty in Wallace and Gromit and I will fight every stop-motion film in existence on this hill
December 28, 2023 at 8:18 PM
Helena Bonham Carter's best role was as Lady Totty in Wallace and Gromit and I will fight every stop-motion film in existence on this hill
Someone bought me a shower speaker and I am secretly afraid to actually put it in the shower in case it's listening to me being naked
December 28, 2023 at 8:08 PM
Someone bought me a shower speaker and I am secretly afraid to actually put it in the shower in case it's listening to me being naked
I made my guy schizo again because this is venting and venting is an instrument, Patrick, but the pieces end up constantly being nothing but a stream of increasingly-incomprehensible dialogue and very concerned people
December 28, 2023 at 8:06 PM
I made my guy schizo again because this is venting and venting is an instrument, Patrick, but the pieces end up constantly being nothing but a stream of increasingly-incomprehensible dialogue and very concerned people
If a masochist does mascara and they make a portmanteau does that make them a masochist
December 28, 2023 at 8:04 PM
If a masochist does mascara and they make a portmanteau does that make them a masochist