Santa Claus? A bearded old man we ask for free stuff from, lie to our kids about, and lives somewhere "up there"?
Who comes up with this crap?

So I’m in the hospital ER and there’s some commotion with someone misbehaving.
Wife (who is a nurse): looks like a code black!
Me: did you order the code black?
Wife: no but someone did.
Me: so if you didn’t order the code black, why was Santiago ever in danger?
Wife: 🤬