I hate when sorcerers say "I don't want to get esoteric, but-" YOU DAMNED FOOL, TO EXIST IS TO BE IMMERSED IN THAT WHICH YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND! ALL THINGS ARE ESOTERIC BY THEIR VERY NATURE! WHERE IS YOUR LUST FOR KNOWLEDGE? GREATNESS DOES NOT COME FROM HESITANCE! PATHETIC!

My wife and I were out on the town and a peasant asked me for a coin, I had to turn to my wife and ask her for a coin to give him. I was so embarrassed that I turned him into ash.

Enemy sorcerers jumped me and locked me in the prison realm for a week. Cowards wouldn't even duel me, they just opened the prison realm and sealed me in, they knew I would have won.

Annual dark sorcerer meeting is coming up and I do NOT want to go, last year Horus the Unforgiving brought up the ONE TIME I send plagues upon his his lands, and just would not let it go the entire event and something tells me it's gonna happen again this year.

Forgot my astral map when travelling the astral realm and almost got lost trying to find my astral way back to my non-astral body, it was so scary and I don't want to astral project anymore

The goblin I banished to the shadow realm found his way back, and started throwing rocks at me. I sent him back, but honestly it was nice to see him again, I hope he escapes again soon.

Wife just found out about the recent plagues I unleashed upon the land, she says I went too far, like, do you know who you married? I'm not called Divine Priest Yorlock, Herald of Angels, I'm literally evil, this is to be expected

Yet another knight has come to my tower to save his princess, she's not gonna let you hit bro

I met a bard at the tavern yesterday with such enchanting eyes, he caught me staring as he played and blew me a kiss. Wife was not happy.

Neophytes learn Magelight and think they're the next Merlin... Apprentice, the darkness conquers all

If anyone has a spare homunculus I would greatly appreciate if you let me borrow it, I turned mine into a pile of ash for hitting on my wife