Danielle Smith Premier of Alberta 🌺 Parody
banner
daniellesmithab.bsky.social
Danielle Smith Premier of Alberta 🌺 Parody
@daniellesmithab.bsky.social
Alberta’s Premier Separatist! Leader of the Wildrose UCP United Conservative Party & Rob Anderson’s APP errand girl. Only Official Parody Account. I am a LIAR! There are better parody accounts. The truth is I am a complete joke…notwithstanding. #abpoli
That…that’s exactly right. I totally connected the dots on this one. #HitTheMonkeyWinACookie

globalnews.ca/news/1151333...
November 6, 2025 at 4:12 AM
My YouSeePee Government has added the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms to Alberta’s list of banned literature!

#UngerReview #Outstanding

www.ungerreview.com/danielle-smi...
October 31, 2025 at 11:52 PM
C an’t
U understand the anger
N otwithstanding
T eachers might quit on me

One more thing… Democracy is dead in Alberta! #ableg #abpoli
October 28, 2025 at 2:10 AM
Today 🙄 Organizer’s APP
October 26, 2025 at 4:41 AM
Dang it! These are the days I wish me and Dave bought a food truck instead of a train restaurant. But hey… at least I was able to sell some Tin Foil hats using the protective seal from my Turkish Tylenol leftovers.

#SepartistRally #FlatEarthConvention
#AbLeg
#YouSeePee
#Freedumb
October 26, 2025 at 3:45 AM
BREAKING: UCP RED TAPE REDUCTION IS WORKING! The results are in!

Phoebe the dog earns AGLC Proserve certification. K-9 now licensed to serve liquor in Alberta. Right then.

#StrongAndFree #UCP #Ableg #abpoli
#CEOKandiceMachadoAGLC
#DirectorRobertPapeAGLC

www.ctvnews.ca/calgary/arti...
October 23, 2025 at 1:22 AM
As UCP Leader & Your Premier, here is my official response to Albertan’s vocal criticism accusing me of politicalizing a government issued License Plate with UCP marketing slogans:

“Yah I’m just not seeing it”

globalnews.ca/news/1147987...
October 16, 2025 at 2:27 PM
Dear PM @mark-carney.bsky.social

1. I said a wanna pipeline from AB to BC

2. Coastal First Nations? Who dat?

3. Your Major Projects Office accepts formal proposals to review for fast track. I DON’T EVEN HAVE A WRITTEN PROPOSAL but I did announce I’m gonna spend $15M to draft one

5. SO…SAY YES🤷🏻‍♀️
October 9, 2025 at 1:12 AM
October 3, 2025 at 9:53 PM
The answer is an unequivocal YES!

YES today I announced plans to build an “excuse me” bitumen pipeline from AB oil sands straight through to the B.C. coast

YES I can confirm private industry is NOT on board

YES I am out of my fucking mind!

#abpoli #climatejustice

www.alberta.ca/release.cfm?...
October 1, 2025 at 9:03 PM
Truth and Reconciliation Sept 30th:

Just a quick note to self cause sometimes I forget to reconcile

And if you still don’t believe that I have Indigenous roots, then @aptnnews.bsky.social might have their story straight.

Reconciliation begins with truth I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️
www.aptnnews.ca/national-new...
September 30, 2025 at 5:55 PM
Minister Nate Horner:

“I encourage ATA’s leadership to take time to meet with their members and gain clarity on what teachers are seeking out of a deal. Students and families deserve stability”

GAIN CLARITY?

I think Teachers just told us to go f—k ourselves!

That clear enough for ya Nate?
#abEd
September 30, 2025 at 5:25 AM
I’d like to get me one of these remotes! Can I get a “notwithstanding clause” button on mine plz? #abpoli

www.cbc.ca/news/canada/...
September 19, 2025 at 6:26 AM
ANNOUNCEMENT: In my commitment to deliberately cause harm while ostracizing & violating the personal privacy of ALL legal, Canadian permanent residents residing in Alberta, my government has rolled out our new #UCP Tramp Stamp on your Driver’s License ID ! You like?

www.ctvnews.ca/calgary/arti...
September 18, 2025 at 2:35 PM
BREAKING! Prime Minister Carney announced first projects to be reviewed by new Major Projects Office to fast track nation building projects!

AND GUESS WHAT! Alberta failed to make the cut! My UCP didn’t have a plan and my big mouth failed to get us across the finish line! Whoops 🤷🏻‍♀️

t.co/2qhuu732I9
September 12, 2025 at 3:35 AM
ALBERTA’S TEACHERS STRIKE NOTICE TO TAKE EFFECT OCTOBER 6th ???

Huh. This makes me think
Alberta teachers are serious about this. 🤔 #abpoli #ableg

www.cbc.ca/news/canada/...
September 10, 2025 at 8:39 PM
OMG! Canadian Author @margaretatwood.bsky.social just gave a shout out to me (Rob Anderson) and my Alberta #UCP. Oh Margie you’re such a kidder! We aren’t burning books. We are just banning books silly 🤪

But if we were burning them, we will not pay the pollution tax on the emissions 👊 #abpoli
August 31, 2025 at 1:49 AM
The UCP polled Albertans to receive feedback on our proposed Alberta Provincial Police. Analogous to our Alberta Pension Plan proposal, we received overwhelmingly disapproval! Soooo…I did it anyway. This is one example why my spending is out of control. Fuck me!

www.keepalbertarcmp.ca/get-involved/
August 23, 2025 at 6:49 PM
The FACT is my Chief of Staff (aka APP Braintrust) supports this populist, anti-covid-vaccine movement! I even secretly think cancer can be cured by chewing raw peppers! In FACT, if you trace my words back, I suggested that if you have stage 4 cancer, you can control it!

www.cbc.ca/player/play/...
August 22, 2025 at 7:35 PM
My boy Bruce! We ran together in our Wildrose daze! Today, we are narrating rhetoric resoundingly similar to discussions prior to Nazi Germany. PS Bruce is a little rusty at the podium…he forgets that he’s not supposed to act like a “5 year old” child when Albertans bring truth #AlbertNextPanel
August 16, 2025 at 9:03 PM
NEXT STEP in my PIPE DREAM!

I’m accepting proposals for a feasibility study to build my east-west pipeline

Since it’s NOT FEASIBLE, I’m going to spend hundreds of millions of dollars anyway to make you believe that it could be. Why?

Because I’m immoral & I lie!

www.alberta.ca/release.cfm?...
August 8, 2025 at 5:40 AM
My 🇺🇸 Mar-a-Lago BFF has shut down PBS for good! Stupid Netflix saved Big Bird & the rest of the Sesame Street gang though. Otherwise it would’ve been a pure win for us Libertarians!

Nothing good comes from non-partisan public broadcasting…especially educational programming🙄

cpb.org/pressroom/Co...
August 2, 2025 at 1:41 AM
ENOUGH! I’m the only one who is allowed to narrate false headlines and lie to the general public. You owe me an apology! #abpoli
July 25, 2025 at 9:00 PM
Check out our recent #UCP post on Twatter!

I’m afraid of Peter Guthrie & Scott Sinclair and the conservative support I’m losing. It’s the FIRST time in 8 years that I published the legacy logo of PC Alberta. I’m trying to get in front of this but flirting with Independence already sealed my fate!😬
July 24, 2025 at 9:42 PM
Yes! I did it! This one’s on me!
July 12, 2025 at 2:55 AM