Mary Heavens
@daddyissuesbarbie.bsky.social
You can windsurf into my life 🎤
If we’ve learned one this this week it’s that young teenage girls are categorically not “fully grown”.
November 17, 2025 at 12:44 PM
If we’ve learned one this this week it’s that young teenage girls are categorically not “fully grown”.
Age yourself with gaming
November 12, 2025 at 10:08 PM
Age yourself with gaming
“Where’s your fuckin…” Oh
Make up your minds please, racists. I’m confused.
Make up your minds please, racists. I’m confused.
November 9, 2025 at 8:40 AM
“Where’s your fuckin…” Oh
Make up your minds please, racists. I’m confused.
Make up your minds please, racists. I’m confused.
November 6, 2025 at 12:14 PM
I don’t mean to boast, lads but look what Kerrygold’s just sent me
November 5, 2025 at 9:23 AM
I don’t mean to boast, lads but look what Kerrygold’s just sent me
We had this walled patio bit in primary school where we’d practise the dances and pretend we were the Pearson siblings. 😍
No lying or making yourself out to be a cool kid. Post the first record you bought. If you can remember the shop or circumstances add that too. Local color appreciated.
No lying or making yourself out to be a cool kid. Post the first record you bought. If you can remember the shop or circumstances add that too. Local color appreciated.
November 3, 2025 at 12:13 PM
We had this walled patio bit in primary school where we’d practise the dances and pretend we were the Pearson siblings. 😍
No lying or making yourself out to be a cool kid. Post the first record you bought. If you can remember the shop or circumstances add that too. Local color appreciated.
No lying or making yourself out to be a cool kid. Post the first record you bought. If you can remember the shop or circumstances add that too. Local color appreciated.
Only mums know true horror
October 31, 2025 at 4:27 PM
Only mums know true horror
Happy Halloween!
October 31, 2025 at 6:52 AM
Happy Halloween!
Why should we have to pay for this?
Fuck the royal family.
Fuck them to hell.
Fuck the royal family.
Fuck them to hell.
October 29, 2025 at 8:38 AM
Why should we have to pay for this?
Fuck the royal family.
Fuck them to hell.
Fuck the royal family.
Fuck them to hell.
Because they have no concept of civil service – ask Clacton
October 28, 2025 at 3:46 PM
Because they have no concept of civil service – ask Clacton
Look at this Standard post from 1971. I wonder if it was written by one of their journalistas
October 27, 2025 at 7:53 AM
Look at this Standard post from 1971. I wonder if it was written by one of their journalistas
Me with my feminizm
October 20, 2025 at 7:11 PM
Me with my feminizm
Spotted in the wild @swansonian.bsky.social !
October 15, 2025 at 6:06 PM
Spotted in the wild @swansonian.bsky.social !
I can’t white put my finger on it, Ed!
October 14, 2025 at 3:40 AM
I can’t white put my finger on it, Ed!
Why are people shocked by this? Go on, get your fucking poppies on next month.
October 7, 2025 at 5:59 AM
Why are people shocked by this? Go on, get your fucking poppies on next month.
My Uber is here
October 5, 2025 at 5:18 AM
My Uber is here
What’s your sign?
September 28, 2025 at 7:15 PM
What’s your sign?
Just getting ready to pose for my compulsory UK ID photo.
September 25, 2025 at 8:02 PM
Just getting ready to pose for my compulsory UK ID photo.
Picture editors doing god’s work 👏
September 24, 2025 at 12:04 PM
Picture editors doing god’s work 👏
Eat shit and die, say the rest of us.
September 20, 2025 at 7:35 AM
Eat shit and die, say the rest of us.
Trump? Windsor?
September 16, 2025 at 4:46 PM
Trump? Windsor?